“What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?”
— Jesus Christ
A crucial part of living is to not, as Marcus Aurelius wrote, merely think or argue what a good person is, but to BE one.
But how are you guided to be that best version of you?
The idea is to, as expressed by retired US Marine Corps general and former Secretary of Defense Jim Mattis:
“Know what you will stand for and, more important, what you won’t stand for … State your flat-ass rules and stick to them. They shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone.”
It’s an almost old-fashioned idea – that we should orient ourselves to a system of values in order to try to live up to a higher standard.
It’s important because a code of conduct sets you free.
You don’t struggle with decisions, nor do you get lost and confused, because you’ve already outlined what is important and of integrity to you.
Jocko Willink, another ex-military man, is famous for his saying, “Discipline equals freedom”.
Of course, there’s always room for intuition and meeting the need of the moment – and kindness and compassion and understanding are all important facets of your rules – but knowing who you want to be is a powerful framework for living well.
But the quality of a character is something that is becoming increasingly rare in this day and age.
You just have to look at our politicians.
The measure of a person used to be their word, now you can’t believe anything that comes out of our leader’s mouths.
Truth is sacrificed for winning.
It’s about me – and a lesser extent, my tribe – staying on top.
Michael Jordan and Lance Armstrong (even without discussing drug use) were notable bullies and tyrants in the sports world; Steve Jobs and Martha Stewart are just two examples from the business world, Harvey Weinstein (predator too) and Ellen deGeneres are two from entertainment.
They got the job done you may say, but at what cost to their relationships, to their legacy … to their souls?
The sole pursuit of more regardless the cost, has a cost.
I don’t know if that can be measured, but I think we – especially in the quiet moments, when we’re alone and still – we all know it.
Doing the right thing, being the right thing is satisfying in itself.
“A job well done” – there’s pride in that. A knowing you did your best. It’s part of knowing you belong to something greater than yourself. Shortcuts and cheating can’t give you that. All they promote is ego and me.
We know how we like to be treated.
What if we attempted to give this best to others, more?
There are individuals we feel good around, inspired by, who are lighthouses. They don’t even have to say much, it’s their being that speaks volumes.
That’s heroic.
The mainstay of my lived philosophy is Gandhi’s exhortation to be what I want to see in the world. Not because it’s popular, but because it seems the right thing to do.
We are so driven by the market – do this and get more likes – it hardly matters any more if it makes you die a little on the inside while you’re doing it. I don’t think the ends justify the means.
If we want a better world, we have to create it.
An enlightened world starts with enlightened individuals.
This starts with our presence, our inner alignment with the source of Good, and the moment to moment attempt to be a lived expression of that.
You have to walk your talk.
There’s a story of Gandhi being asked by a mother to tell her son to give up sugar. He told them to come back in two weeks time.
Two weeks later he said, “Young man, give up sugar, it’s not good for you” – upon which the mother asked why Gandhi hadn’t simply told the boy to quit two weeks prior.
“Because I needed to give up sugar first,” explained the Mahatma (which means great soul – which is someone who lives their philosophy, amongst other things).
If we don’t walk our talk, we are just as hypocritical as the people we’re pointing the finger at.
And I’m not expecting anyone to master any of this straight away, but just to try to be better, attempt for inner more-ness.
When you attempt the living of the purity of your soul, you win, and we all win.
T.S. Eliot put it beautifully when he wrote,
“To do the useful thing, to say the courageous thing, to contemplate the beautiful thing: that is enough for one man's life.”
So there you go. Something to contemplate for today.
Go well!
Arjuna