Don’t wait for life to bring you happiness. Go and bring happiness to life.
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One of my first experiences with mindfulness training was to sit and mindfully eat a packet of raisins – one at a time.
Maybe my mistake was turning up hungry. Maybe I “should” have merely observed these sensations and the desire to consume the whole thing, cardboard packet and all. Maybe …
(There's so many maybes and shoulds in my life, I decided to stop listening to them. How about you?)
What I found more fruitful (did I just make a pun?) an experience was a complete immersion in nature. Given my job as an outdoor instructor and that I lived in a forest at the bottom of a mountain, able to look out the window and see the river that I so loved to kayak, I got a lot of immersion.
You know those times? When you forget everything that bothers you? When you’re just so content and fulfilled to be alive and witness to beauty and rightness that surrounds you?
See, I found those times absolutely in the middle of some stunning nature, but I also found them with my hands deep in soapy water, doing dishes, content to be putting some small order in my corner of chaos.
It was about being present – yes. I had to be in the same place as my body for these sublime moments of clarity to come.
But it was also about an attitude of whole-hearted acceptance, even appreciation and love, for the moment I found myself in.
You see –
Often meditation and mindfulness is taught as a means of, and to, pure observation and witnessing; a tool to learn to focus and direct your attention on the present moment.
A grand thing, a noble thing! But as I just talked about, it can be dry, tasteless, lacking a certain something …
Just as we are beings with two legs, two arms, two eyes and two halves to our brains, there’s two sides to our humanity – a logical side and an emotional side. We may be more comfortable with the language of one or the other, but we possess both.
Feeling is as important as logic.
So in terms of a whole picture approach to your meditation and mindfulness practice, and to your life –
When you remember, return your attention to observation, awareness and focus of this moment – using the breath, a mantra, the Ascension techniques, whatever you like. But I’d also encourage you to deliberately choose your attitude to the practice itself.
What I mean is, try not changing what you see but how you see it. (… and that in itself will change what you see!).
It's why William James so rightfully declared,
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“The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes.”
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Do you get me?
Let me expand a little more.
Gratitude is fantastically good for us.
You know it, I know it.
It makes us less stressed and anxious and more happier and healthier by regularly choosing to see the good, the right, what we have, what is here. It stops us taking these things for granted and dwelling in what’s wrong, broken, and missing; what we don’t have.
Gratitude is closely connected with appreciation, love and compassion – all noble elements of life; all attitudes TO life.
What you focus on, grows, right? Feed the right wolf.
Now –
Our attitude is a choice we make. It’s something we do, something we can practice.
Glass half empty, or half full?
Cause of suffering, or silver lining?
Is life happening TO you, or is it happening FOR you?
“I can’t do it” … ? or “I can’t do it, yet” … ?
Your attitude is a choice that you’re already making – perhaps unconsciously, but you’re definitely making a choice to see yourself, your life and world in a certain way.
So –
Mindfully, deliberately, consciously become aware of your approach to everything. Start in your meditation practice – because it is your training ground for life.
Assume an attitude of appreciation and gratitude – even love – to the process of returning to now, as you’re involved in it.
Don’t get into an attitude of being frustrated about the busy-ness of your mind, or the fact you’ve forgotten, or about the neighbour’s dog yapping away when you’re trying to focus.
Just return, with appreciation for the fact that you remembered, that you’re here now, that you can step back and witness whatever this moment contains.
This is where the satisfaction, the fulfilment, the immersion in life really begins … where observation and appreciation combine.
An added dimension, if you like:
Do it for someone else. Bring in compassion and dedicate your session to another – a beautiful act of service and giving.
All of this means your meditation practice becomes effortlessly easier, smoother. You won’t fight and get in the way of what needs to happen by insisting on what you think should happen.
Your every reaction becomes, with practice, “Good!”, just like Jocko Willink – if you know who he is.
And –
It is the secret to a life of Amor Fati … an end to arguing with reality – and yet not merely accepting or tolerating what is, but loving it.
Rock solid present moment awareness and presence AND appreciation and gratitude and a love for all of life, as it’s happening.
Pretty awesome.
So get going, get practicing – and enjoy the fruits of that.
Remember – you’re not changing what you see, but how you see it – and that is the secret.
And if I can help with anything to do with meditation, mindfulness, and life in general, let me know. I’d love to help.
Go well!
Arjuna
PS.
How much good, important work do you think you could get done if you went away for five distraction free days, surrounding yourself with a team of like-minded people?
Indeed, and that’s what we’re doing here in Richmond, N Yorks, on 6-10 March.
Want more details? Just hit reply and I’ll get back to you as soon as.
PPS.
The February Ascension meditation course is sold out, with the next available dates being 31 March - 2 April (starts 7pm Friday).
More details here – https://www.arjunaishaya.com/ishayasascension, or just ask.
No matter how good that app is, there’s nothing in the world like face to face instruction; nor are the best inner tools and technologies taught without individual guidance.
It’s a grand weekend, and it would be lovely to have you.
PPS.
And of course, if you’re not ready for that yet, my free mini-course in meditation and mindfulness and coaching group, The 200% Dojo, is here:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/708920116904793