“I had it! But then I lost it”… lots of people say this.
What is “it”?
Consider this. There’s a sweet spot within you, an inner sense of rightness, of connection. Your mind is clear, you can let go and be present, your sense of humour and play fully operational.
It’s the foundation for the best of life, and you know it when you’re there.
You’ll find it and lose it and find it again. That’s not a failure, that’s just what new looks like.
But here’s the thing.
You don’t lose it because you’re bad at holding on to it. You lose it because everything else you give your time to, however necessary and important, slowly starves your roots. You’re not undisciplined or useless or whatever self judgement will throw at you, at all, you are undernourished.
Your signal is right here, it just gets buried under all the noise again and again.
This is where a practice changes everything.
Not leaning on willpower, not trying harder to be present, but an actual method for getting back beneath the static to the place that never really goes anywhere. Without that, you’re a tourist, visiting the best of yourself and then watching it slip away. With it, you start to live there.
You know that space. You’ve tasted it. But you just give a ton of time to everything else apart from nurturing it.
So, truly, what are you giving time to that is necessary and important, but where you slowly but surely lose sense of who you are?