Tim Ferriss, the author and podcaster, often asks his guests, “Who is the most successful person you can think of?”
It’s a mighty fine question – What IS success, to you, anyway?
My idea of a successful life, while it’s not the only thing, first and foremost is to be free of suffering. One of the greatest guides to being free of suffering lies in the Serenity prayer:
“Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.”
— The Serenity Prayer (as used by the Alcoholics Anonymous and other Anonymous recovery groups)
I love these words. To gain all of these attributes is one of the reasons I embarked on a spiritual search, it’s one of the reasons why I became a monk.
There’s no better foundation for life.
If you could pay attention to these three things and move forward in them, life gets significantly easy, quick. Master these things and you’re golden, you’re set up.
It’s about taking care of your responsibilities and making a difference in the world; but equally it’s about keeping your centre, your inner sense of peace, and not flying off the handle or giving into negativity and overwhelm or limitation while you create the life you want.
It’s about balance isn’t it?
A balance between courage and serenity, change and acceptance, action and patience, passion and peace, doing and being, seeing what could be better and gratitude for what is, chasing more and having enough.
These things aren’t opposites as our culture commonly holds them – they are different sides of the same coin. Both are necessary. When balanced, applied at the right time and the right place, they enable you to create a life you’re truly proud of and excited by. One completely free of suffering.
Balance is so critically important, yet so lacking in the world today – just because we think serenity and courage, peace and passion are opposites.
They’re not, they’re really not. Once you know they’re not opposites, they become fairly self-evident. We know serenity and courage when we’re aware of the need for them.
Therefore:
Know that they’re important to foster. So when you’re aware you’re getting frustrated or anxious, you dial it back sooner and easier. Or when you’re avoiding or procrastinating or just plain doubting your ability, you jump in, you move forward before the fear gets too big and stops you.
The Serenity Prayer doesn’t give you the how, but it does show you the what, as in what’s important to pay attention to.
So: pay attention, and then wisdom will come from there.
More on that next week.