“If you want real control, drop the illusion of control. Let life live you. It does anyway.”
— Byron Katie
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We love control. Control, we believe, is power.
Yet it's not.
It’s a recipe for struggle and strain, pushing and force, over-thinking, fear and frustration.
Think about it – when did rigid control actually bring you what you want? And if it did, what was the cost of hanging on so tight? Honestly?
As Byron Katie says, with 100% accuracy, life lives you anyway … so why not surrender to it?
Let me say that again: Life lives you anyway.
Look, life absolutely does. Despite your best efforts to control and force what you think should happen, life has a logic and timing and a precision all of its own.
If you want to effectively make your way in the world, with total peace and joy, you have to work with, not against.
The fact is the idea of surrender scares us silly. Terrifies us.
Yet despite what we may believe, surrender is not weak, it’s not being a doormat, it’s not being uncaring or discarding your responsibilities and goals, it’s clarity.
It’s seeing what you can control and what you can’t. It’s seeing what is too much; but it’s also seeing what is too little. Surrender gives you wisdom; you can meet the need of the moment precisely. Exactly.
Want perfection?
Perfection is never when, it is only ever right here. Perfection comes when you jump into the Goldilocks spot of completely forgetting what you think should be, and complete alignment with what is.
Zero stress, zero strain, zero force. So consider these things warning bells when you’re not in alignment.
Now – that’s easy to say but harder to experience.
Mainly because it takes practicing the right things, and we don’t commonly a) know what these things are, or b) prioritise them as the most crucial things we can do to make our lives better, simpler, easier.
If I wanted more effectiveness and enjoyment in my life, the biggest question I’d be asking is this:
“When am I the wisest? What is the source of clarity, of my wisdom?” And – “How can I live from there more often?”
Well – already said it.
Your power source is deep in the present moment, it is when you are aligned and centred right here in the presence of now. There’s the smallest of switches, of “tuning in’s” that occurs when you get it right. Small it may be but by diving deep into your Self, you are given all that you need to respond to each and every moment in time.
You live life best when you are aligned; it’s the greatest thing you can do for any part of your life because you’re aligning with the source of all life.
As Desmond Tutu once said,
“We are only the light bulbs, and our job is just to remain screwed in.”
I know this sounds a little mystical, but you know what? It is. Kinda. Flow and perfection. Effectiveness, ease and joy. Dancing. True adventure. Walking your true path. The end of suffering.
Why not you?
Truly – go within so you can go beyond. Let go to get more.
And the people around you will love you for it.
Let me know if you want help with that. I have ways and means that work beautifully.
Go well,
Arjuna