The Dalai Lama supposedly once said, collected in some internet Words of Wisdom, “Dance like no one’s watching”.
And wonderful advice that is.
We get so tied up in “What will they think?”; we get so confused about comparing ourselves with others; we have such over the top concern with whether we’re doing life “right” that everything we do is stilted and rigid and self-conscious, everything we dream of gets squashed before it has a chance to begin, we can get sucked into group think just because it seems everyone is going one way and we don’t want to stand out.
Dancing through life like no one is watching or measuring or caring is incredibly freeing. Just walking down the street without the pressure of self-management and evaluation has soooo much lightness to it, it’s ridiculous.
I still remember those first times that my inner self-manager would go quiet, offline. Maybe after a yoga class, maybe after an adventure away in nature, maybe just a lucky roll of the mental health dice on a sunny Sunday morning … a lack of rigid inner direction meant I felt like I wasn’t walking to the bakery, I was floating. Beautiful.
But.
Then you have some supreme words of wisdom on the other side of the balance sheet; these from legendary basketball coach John Wooden:
“The true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching.”
Would you still be doing and saying everything you do and say if you knew your partner, your kids, someone you respect and admire was watching?
Probably not.
The standards we hold ourselves to can slip so easily if we think no one knows. I got into all sorts of behaviours that I would hide from everyone – or even more insidiously, hide from certain people in my life. Insidious? Well, if I’m doing and saying things to only some people and not to others? What kind of authentic and honest life is that? Or was I just trying to be someone to certain people, playing the game of delivering a version of me that I thought would be most appealing?
My gut knew what I was doing or saying wasn’t right, or true and aligned, but my ego didn’t care. It wanted instant pleasure or to fit in or a sense of power more than anything.
That, I think, is an excellent guide to a truly satisfying and authentic and Good life: You already know.
Bringing that into life, into everything that you do, say and even think … that’s the aim. Getting clear on, and being aligned with, your highest truth is the greatest adventure and mission you can partake in.
And.
As always, there’s a deeper level to all this.
Align with your highest truth, be centred in the source of pure wisdom within you and you care not whether someone is watching, whether you notice it makes a difference to others or not.
You do it and you live it because it is what’s right. Not expedient, not pleasurable, not easy … but because it’s true. But living in truth brings aliveness, it brings freedom, it brings courage, it brings peace.
We start needing laws and rules and guidelines, but then by going within, you need none of these because you become them. You transcend rigidity and “should” and become what is good and right; someone who can perfectly meet the need of the moment, truly anchored in truth.
In an age of confusion and suffering and struggle and division, you become the answer to the world’s problems. You become a lived example of what we need, more than anything.
An enlightened world needs enlightened individuals. So … you on this quest? Salutations! Keep going, even if you fall. Not only is it the most satisfying thing you can chase in the world, it is the most useful.
Go well!
Arjuna