“A key measure of emotional intelligence is knowing that every virtue taken to its extreme becomes a vice.”
– Warren Farrell
_______________
I recently had to cancel an Ascension meditation course.
It had been planned for months, people had booked travel and accommodation … and then COVID came for a visit.
Now, what it showed me was how much I hate letting people down. I really would like to meet people’s expectations, in fact, exceed them. I have a very real desire to make sure people are having the best time possible from me.
There’s two sides to this.
It’s great to want to help people in the best possible way I can. But, obviously, it’s also a lot of pressure to put upon myself.
I can’t control the way people respond, I just can’t. None of us can. I can play my part as fully as I can, but there are some places I just can’t – and don’t want to be able to – reach.
Balance, right? Too much of anything becomes its opposite.
Assertive is good, aggression is not.
Preparation is good, obsession is not.
Letting go is great, not caring is not.
Caring is great, attachment is not.
Have you ever seen this?
I really got to see my attachment to other people being happy – which is a wonderful thing. I can offer my best but be free of how other people may respond.
More freedom for me, and more freedom for them – because I don’t need them to be any particular way, they are free of my need. Which is a great gift in itself.
Like everything that seems like bad news, there are always wonderful lessons that can be gleamed, huh?
But how do you feel your way into balance and this kind of middle path, not too hot, not too cold, doing your best but not falling prisoner to the extremes?
I think you have to give up on specifics and head to the source of what is best in any given moment.
You see, the Good of yesterday is not the Good of today.
Good is a dynamic thing, it is an alive process that can only be known here and now. You can’t just apply the same mould to a different moment and expect it to fit.
If you want more Good in your life – and it’s a very worthy goal because everyone wins when you’re living up to the Good; no one wins when you’re not – the best thing you can do is be really present to now.
In presence you can see what now needs.
Here you can truly be wise. Here you can do the highest thing you know. Here you can truly help.
And you ARE wise. You DO know; when you take the time to listen, to be present, to feel, to sense life as it unfolds.
It may not be what everyone else is doing, it may not be what you have always done – but all the more power to you for that. It’s your truth, your life.
So show up to now, as best you can. You will know and you will be shown. Act on this – attempting to bring forth the highest thing you know is really so satisfying, it really is.
Seek wisdom itself; it's already within you.
Alrighty?
Go well!
Arjuna