Experts Have Said This Is THE Most Important …

It was one of those lists - You know, you’re on the internet,

Surfing aimlessly, heh heh -

And up pops:

“Experts say …”

(Usually a large amount of rubbish)

This time it’s something like:

THE “12 critically important and vital things to prioritise in your life”

I can’t quite recall,

But I am a sucker for those lists.

One point struck me though -

The author said he thought one of the most important things for him to fill his life with …

Was kindness.

He did qualify it by saying it’s not about being a walkover,

But rather treating people exactly how he wanted to be treated by others …

If not better.

I thought -

How wonderful.

If the only thing I am remembered for is kindness, then I’ll be happy about that.

Hopefully there’s more, but kindness is a great start ; )

I realised a long time ago that being aware of my actions and words leads to greater and greater kindness.

The times when I’ve gossiped and been snarky were all when I was completely unconscious.

Unaware and asleep to the result of such words and deeds.

And to be honest -

I’ve also been trying to be cool, to be liked by others.

Do you know that?

That kind of making ourselves feel better by slagging someone else off.

(Rather than actually talking to the person concerned about our problem).

Yup, we’ve probably all been there.

Awareness -

Such a huge thing.

It means you can make different choices:

Being positive and looking to build the people around you up? Amazing.

Coming to a place within yourself where you have nothing to prove and nothing to hide? Such a solid place to live from.

Gossip and bitching? Urggg.

Trying to impress others? Like I spent a large amount of my life doing - always fruitless endeavour.

Awareness of these unconscious habits and deeds and words is the way out.

Overcoming your baser nature is what the inner game is all about.

Being kinder starts with being more aware.

Awareness, awareness, awareness.

That is the answer to everything.

Everything.

(and there’s no end to it either - wahey!)

BTW:

The author of the list also mentioned honesty -

Saying honesty was a form of kindness WHEN the person wishes to hear it.

Of course -

When honesty is forced upon someone, no one wants to hear it. Right?

When you’re open to it though, it’s very welcomed -

So much so you start seeking it out.

Because clear honesty makes you more aware of yourself.

And in that you can’t lose.

That's me, and my thought for the day.

Go well! Arjuna

PS.

How do you get more aware? More mindful?

This here is packed full of ideas:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

The Daily Adventures of the Skeleton Foot

CooL!

I love the weird news.

Makes me feel not so weird -

I can procrastinate for hours like this, you know …

Latest favourite weird thing?

A girl lost her lower leg to cancer.

She asked if she could keep her foot -

Had it cleaned, treated and wired together,

And now her foot skeleton has an instagram page detailing it’s daily adventures.

How awesome -

Having a sense of humour in the face of some awfulness.

What an excellent step forward huh?

“I decide whether I’m happy or not, NOT cancer”

Life can be a bit of a bugger sometimes,

Cancer, losing limbs - probably one of people’s biggest fears, right?

But not taking any of it seriously is a super leap forward in terms of dealing with it.

Also is an excellent early warning sign that you’re getting loaded down,

Stressed and struggling and need to do something different -

Losing that sense of humour is in some ways worse than losing a foot.

Hey - it’s never what happens to you that affects you,

But how you react.

How you deal with it.

That’s what you have control over.

Claim your own happiness, don’t wait to be given it.

Don’t let circumstances take it away from you.

Prioritise and protect it.

It is one of the greatest things you can possess.

Because when you work out how to choose for it,

To get it with it being caused by anything?

No one and no thing can take it away from you.

No one and no thing.

And perspective and clarity and anti-stress come thrown in for free too.

Truly the one of the best things you can have.

Alright?

How?

Right here is what you need, FREE stuff!

108 ways to lose stress and struggle and get calm and centred and more time in your busy day.

MORE time?

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

Keep the peace!

Arjuna

May The Fourth of what?

Totally confused: All day yesterday -

People saying “may the fourth be with you”

4th of May

Stars Wars day?

Geddit?

Yeah I missed it too

Though if you have star wars fans in your family

You couldn’t have missed it.

You would understand.

Is it only males that are Star Wars people?

I guess I’ll find out when Bubba grows up.

May be this is a new departure into a whole girly world of pinkness and unicorns for me?

I’ll let you know how she turns out …

Understanding is important, crucial even when connecting with people

The fact is a great amount of women came last night

To an online training for busy stressed out mums and how to be cool, calm and collected

Even in the midst of it a busy family life

If you missed it, it’ll still be up for a little while (head this way if you want to see it)

Interesting though -

I came in for a bit of criticism before hand

One lady said “I had no idea what mums go through”

And that is absolutely true.

Yet - I’m super good at listening so I’ve learnt a lot over the years

Understanding IS key so you can start talking and support

But yet, to be honest, despite the challenges of life being vastly different to different people,

Say a soldier to a mum …

The solutions are really quite similar.

Sometimes though if you’re offered a solution,

It will mean DOING something different

And that there can be threatening,

Because you can no longer blame anyone else.

Right?

^^^

If you’re a busy mum and interested in DOING something about ending stress and struggle and wot not?

This a great way to get started:

And we'll keep chatting about this stuff so you can really get to grips with it.

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

Questions?

Fire away!

Arjuna

How Much For Dirty Jeans?!

You know when you buy clothes on eBay - (I don't but Sumati does)

And they arrive in the post, unwashed and smelly …

It’s all a bit “yuck” … ?

Well this takes the cake:

Just popped up on my newsfeed:

A pair of jeans that you can buy right now …

That are completely covered in mud -

Absolutely covered …

As if you got a farm labourer to wear them for a week of digging out the muck heap.

They are seriously dirty.

The best thing though?

If you DID actually want a pair of these designer filthy jeans?

They will cost you £331.

Apparently you can buy authentically “pre-stained” underwear to go with them as well …

(My joke - excuse me but lack of sleep is causing a little chaos)

A couple of things here:

In the fashion world, much like the sporting world, or politics … (or every social circle come to think of it) -

You can find people with ZERO lack of confidence and NADA self-doubt.

Just gonads -

You wouldn’t be second guessing yourself trying to sell dirty jeans at that price would you?

And then -

Fashion itself.

Trends …

Not only wear this, but do this, eat this, THINK this …

Why do some people not look beneath the surface?

There’s so many ideas of the right way to do something,

Just because this book or that celebrity guru or your neighbour said so -

But it doesn’t make it correct for you.

Sumati hates reading bubba raising advice.

There’s SO much of it -

And when she’s exhausted it ALL makes her feel like she’s doing it wrong.

That’s why we both got into this game.

This inner game -

Of learning to ignore doubt and worry and “I’m no good thoughts”

And of coming to see what is right for us, as individuals, as a couple.

This I know this for certain -

When you have your own head well trained,

It makes all of life so much easier.

And fun.

Life has to be fun.

If you’d like to know how,

And you’re a busy mum -

Then come along on tomorrow (Thursday 4 May) at 8pm

I’ll tell you how:

https://business.facebook.com/MrArjunaIshaya

See you there! Arjuna

Poo Everywhere!

There I was - sleeping in. Bank Holiday Monday.

Bubba was quiet last night so I took the “not often have chance" to start my new book,

And it was amazing, so I kept reading and reading.

Love that:

Reading late, chatting with Sumati, kicking back and just doing NOTHING -

All because today’s agenda (was) a long big fat nothingness.

That was the plan at least …

Until bubba’s nappy exploded at 6am.

She was in bed with us …

Sumati shrieks as yellow poo somehow escapes the nappy and jets everywhere,

All over the sheets, all over Sumati,

(At least I stayed untainted)

Ahhhh …

There goes my sleep in, up in smoke.

What happened to my life?

I used to have one.

Now it’s nothing but constant nappy-ness.

Can’t remember when I was last in a kayak, on the river.

Sigh …

Guess I should have read the small print, huh?

(I’m being dramatic … I do love this, even though it keeps me on my toes)

This ever happen to you?

Not the poo, but the much looked forward to plan vanishing before your eyes?

I bet.

A fact of life, huh?

Perhaps if I never planned and looked forward to anything I would never be disappointed when it doesn’t come through?

Nah - that’s not the way.

That would be BORING!

Being flexible is the way,

And being rigid is what leads to stress.

It’s holding tight that hurts.

You ever heard of that Buddhist idea of “non-attachment”?

—-> Has very little to do with having no possessions,

And everything to do with not holding tight to life.

The way forward to end stress and flow like a calm, silent happy ninja through the night?

Make plans, have ideas, possess things -

Just don’t let them possess you.

ALL of life gets better then you do.

You actually enjoy stuff WAY more, WAY more.

OK?

Good.

Go well, and flow like water …

(that’s my Bruce Lee impression)

Arjuna

PS.

How?

It’s always the next question.

“But HOW do I actually do that Arjuna?”

Well it all begins with getting a relationship with presence and being, now.

It's actually super simple when you know how.

Takes some practice, but doesn't anything?

I’m doing an online training for specifically for busy mums on HOW too -

Join me, Thursday 4 May 8pm GMT

here:

https://business.facebook.com/MrArjunaIshaya

A Sparkle In Your Eye?

Someone once said that people will forget what you say and do, But they’ll never forget how you make them FEEL.

It's very true.

You know when you meet someone just for a moment and they make such a lasting impression?

(In a good way)

When I first met my first Ishayas, I fell head over heels in love.

Total puppy dog follow them around.

Both were women, both were completely “ordinary” looking -

Yet completely extraordinary at the same time.

Don’t know if I can describe it, but I just wanted to be around them as much as possible.

They were calm but there was so much life in their skin, you could feel it -

It was as if by just being around them they reminded me of how to be like that too.

They were having what seemed like a LOT of fun,

With this sparkle in their eyes, they had a manner that said:

“Self-contained, completely content, nothing to hide, nothing to prove, nothing to fear, absolutely alive”

Which was like an unspoken invitation to me to be the same.

The weekend I spent with them wasn't so much about what they taught me,

(Which was amazing)

But how they were, how they lived and laughed, how they did each and every moment.

That’s what I still remember to this day:

How they made me feel.

Yup - your presence speaks louder than any deeds or words.

It’s not what you achieve but HOW you achieve it,

That’s what changes everything -

That’s what makes a lasting impact on your loved ones, on your community, on all the people around you.

And that’s what ultimately gives you satisfaction at a job well done,

A day well lived.

Remember that.

You can have that fulfilment and that impact (though you might not even know it)

It all comes back to your presence.

Your being.

You - not someone else’s way or manner or presence, but yours -

You - resting in yourself, alive to this moment.

Job done.

Go well, ok?

Arjuna

PS.

How do you DO that all the time?

How do you end reacting and being grouchy and stressed?

Two ways you can go about this:

If you're a busy mum who would like to handle her mum-dom

(like a kingdom but a mum-dom - get it?)

With nothing but style and panache:

A free webinar on Thursday 4 May at 8pm,

Click here for details and to register (it's so I can send you some homework and reminders)

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/cool-calm-collected/ OR

If you want something straight away as well,

This will help you get started:

108 Ways to free yourself of stress, guilt and frazzle and get super calm and super happy and super awesome;

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

How A Struggle Becomes A Springboard

Lightbulb moments!

Everyone loves them - do you?

When the light comes on, and it all makes sense.

Moments of clarity.

The fog clears, and you go “aha!”

Well, I love them.

One of my big lightbulb moments?

When my Ascension meditation teacher pointed something out to me.

He’s given me a few such moments, he’s pretty good at switching on lights.

I was going through a rough patch you see,

A bit confused, feeling a bit “broken” - you know, like I’m fundamentally “stuck” and not right some how.

But he said something that really helped, and I wanted to share with you:

That everything I EVER go through,

Every challenge, every struggle, every experience, every seeming deficiency and disability

Everything is:

a) Exactly what I need to become fully me, to fully accept who I am. No apologies, No hiding.

and

b) So I could help other people from direct, personal experience.

And those words made ALL the difference.

Because there were people supporting me at the time -

Who I knew had been through much worse experiences in their lives compared to mine,

They were saying, “don’t worry, just do this, you’ll be fine, you are fine”

And I could trust them because they had been there and done that.

The thought that I was going through it to become more me and help someone else from experience?

Wonderful.

It made sense of everything.

It meant I just needed to put my head down and not wonder “why me?”

Just keep going until I got out the other side.

Which always happens when you have a tool to let go of thoughts and a way forward, complete with support.

So if you’re ever feeling a bit down in the dumps,

Don’t wonder why …

Know that it’s all in hand, it’ll all turn out for the best - a bigger, brighter, better you.

You just keep returning to presence and awareness and be as glass half full as you can.

OK?

Great stuff.

Have fun out there!

And let me know how I can help.

What might help is in the PS, just below

Arjuna

PS.

A advanced warning heads up for you

Thursday 4th May 8pm (GMT)

I’ll be doing a little online seminar, workshop, talk that you might like to come along to

It’s specifically for mums, busy working mums, cos quite a few have been asking

But if you’re a parent (ie a dad, thats the only option left right?) you’ll still get it

It’s about mindfulness, meditation, awareness … yes -

But specifically how to be that in a busy life.

How to keep your centre and not be stressed and listen to those doubt thoughts -

Instead be able to choose how you want to respond and react and do

And live a life you’re satisfied with.

If you want to be there, start here with my "108 ways" (free) guide to being more calm and alive:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

I'll tell you when and how to get to the webinar too.

Good Triumphs Over Evil (Yay!)

Here’s a cool story for you - (And an even better photo that goes with it)

I was overjoyed when I first saw it as a kid.

For it's one of those stories when good triumphs over evil -

And all kids (and adult kids too) love that kind of story.

OK, so ... story time -

KV Switzer just last week ran the Boston Marathon at the age of 70

Which is cool in itself - I would LOVE to be that active at that age.

The best thing is: history was made when KV first ran the same race back in 1967 -

All because KV is Kathrine and women weren’t allowed to run back then.

You know, ladiez being “naturally” weak and prone to swooning and having to carry babies and all that.

She ran anyway -

An enraged official tried to grab her and pull her off the course (this guy was furious)

Except her huge boyfriend is right there ...

(Bigger than Hugh “Huge” Jackman, so that's saying something)

And this beefy guy shoulder charges the forces of evil into the gutter.

Hurrah!

(You HAVE to check out the photos - the faces are perfect), here they are:

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/apr/18/first-woman-officially-run-boston-marathon-kathrine-switzer-50?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other

Kathrine finished the race,

Everything changes in that small part of the world,

Women can now run, if they want. Good!

Why do I love it?

As a kid I knew the world was unfair.

I’m a white boy with a tiny experience of life and already it’s obvious things are not equal.

So it was awesome to see someone getting their own little victory over the bullies.

It was also really inspiring to see someone saying:

“The rules are stupid, screw doing what you think I’m supposed to do - I’m doing what I want”

It made me think -

Despite all the rules and shoulds and “what will people think”s that we internalise so much it becomes “truth” -

eg … “Women can’t run a marathon” …

How ridiculous now - but how many ideas have we held to be “true” that now seem silly?

How many people are thinking right now “I’m getting old, I can’t be running marathons …”

How many unexamined road blocks do we still have in our own heads?

I realised:

There was stuff that is externally unfair and the rules and stupid “truths” that just didn’t make any sense -

But the chains of “truth” in our own heads create a prison more than anything.

The “I can’t”, “I’m no good”, “What will they think of me?” or “I’m too old or slow or stupid” …

These things held you back more than an external “The Man” or “Mr Smith” or other bully or force of evil.

Because it sounds like your voice in your head, it seems like THE Truth.

You know?

But it is the one place you can free yourself from -

When you see it clearly.

It’s true:

When you clear up the mental debris,

It clears the way for you to live a life you’re proud of,

That satisfies you.

In doing so, it helps others do the same (if they wish)

There’s much to be done in the world for sure,

But the one excellent place to start is your own head.

When you’re free up top, you’re really free to make change in the world.

Alright?

On that - go well! Arjuna

PS.

I have 108 different ways that you can get calm, present and mindful

Clearing any limiting beliefs out of the way so sweetly and smoothly.

If you'd like a huge friend that gets rid of obstacles for you,

Here's how to get a free copy: https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

Freedom From Fear

Recently had a conversation about fear - It’s the biggest struggle everyone has, isn’t it?

In life, freedom from fear is one thing that is definitely worth searching for.

It is the one thing worth having because then you truly have life.

And the most amazing thing is you don’t need to be an adrenaline junkie to get it.

Freedom from fear is not about facing extreme situations.

In ordinary life your mind can throw up so many things to be fearful about.

That noise late at night.

The bank account, the bills, the future of your career.

Your and your families health …

“What does everyone think of me?”

“Should I do this or should I do that?”

Not to mention the “big” topics: terrorism, war, environmental disaster …

You know?

The first time I drove Sumati and little bubba home from hospital?

You bet I had a flash of realisation of how infinitely more precious my cargo now was.

And how extremely careful the drive home was.

But that’s the thing isn't it?

A concern to ensure freedom and life and the good things -

Can become an obsession about what might go wrong and the loss of them.

Your mind gets so wrapped up in protection and possibilities you completely lose all freedom.

You freeze.

You get anxious, worried, panicky, stressed -

And all about a potential. An idea. A possibility. Something that is not true right now.

Your concern spins out of control and turns into a prison of your own making.

You want happiness and ease and security but your mind leads you on a dance into the exact opposite.

You grip so tightly to life you lose it.

What to do?

Recognise what’s happening.

Recognise the loss of freedom and life from the excessive process of your own mind.

Notice how your mind races off into the future creating all kinds of dramatic stories.

Do you want to live like this?

Get present.

Get out of your head.

It is end of all fear and the source of all life.

Here’s some (in fact 108) super simple ideas to make that a reality:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Go well! Arjuna

PS.

I used to be so afraid.

Afraid of what people thought, of money running out, of doing something wrong

When I realised the biggest source of fear was my own head and it’s shenanigans it made going beyond it so much easier

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

Willing To Go Through Hell? (you’re doing it all wrong)

“You willing to go through hell to get what you want?” “You ready to bleed for this?!”

Really?

I’m not interested.

How about you?

I see it all the time around and about,

(In fact I used to be a little like that myself - to be honest)

A kind of level of extreme, head first, no prisoners approach to …

Well, many different things …

Weight loss, fitness, business, and even good old mastery of one’s mind.

You know, because I've tried it I can say with 100% authority and experience:

It just doesn’t work.

It’s fine if you’re that kind of gung ho “smash it” hulk personality … or you have the steely discipline of a super ninja robot,

But even then it wears out.

Because it’s harsh.

And harshness isn’t fun, nor rewarding.

(unless you’re hardwired for some masochism, I guess …?)

And if it isn’t fun or rewarding you just aren’t going to do it on a long term.

You’re not going to make it part of your life.

Therefore there's no transformation.

But the fact is you don't need to anyway.

Here’s the thing when it comes to mastering your mind.

Conquering physical challenges is one thing, i.e. making friends with discomfort.

Being able to direct your focus, ignoring certain thought patterns and choosing others is completely different.

There’s not a lot of cross over there.

There isn’t.

So many people think mastering their minds lays in mastering physical discomfort.

When I tried this approach I found I was so focussed on the physical I couldn’t move beyond it.

I couldn't get to deeper levels of calm and centredness and joy and inner presence.

There was just relief and gratitude that I’d finished being "disciplined".

OK?

So the question isn’t “are you prepared to bleed” to overcome the whiney, negative, anxious, reactive part of yourself …

NOT: "are you prepared to go through hell to get to heaven?",

But are you prepared to go through heaven to get to even greater levels of heaven?

Are you prepared to make it supremely easy, and in fact joyful?

If so?

You’ll like our approach a lot:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Keep the peace! Arjuna

PS If you’re not yet sure if you can make it simple and easy and joyful?

Why not let the reins loose just a little?

Just to say you’ve tried it …

Put a smile on your dial, be a touch gentle with yourself?

You can always go back if it doesn’t work.

What If You Just Quit The Internet?

Just got internet supplied to our new house. Look who's back! Wifi’s back!

It’s taken since January - at least 3 whole months of being without the wide world web in the house.

I’m ecstatic.

Overjoyed.

Thrilled even.

There is so much that the internet can give me - 

Kayaking videos

Music

Fail Army

Facebook

Googling “is my baby's poo supposed to look like that?”

You know - cool stuff!

Sumati’s mood has improved considerably too. Heh heh.

Technology is a joy -

But it can be a curse, right?

Witness the walking dead -

The zombie apocalypse of former humans now brain dead,

Endlessly scrolling through their mobile phones,

Ignoring all peoples, all traffic, everything around them,

Relationships dying as they forget how to converse with a live person.

That fine art of asking interesting questions, telling interesting stories, listening - really listening.

So often people will say:

“Detox! Get rid of it all”

And talk about the simplicity of a life without technology, a life without constant updates, of such contact-ability.

Getting away from it all -

It’s a nice idea.

But throwing it ALL away is never the answer.

It’s realising that it’s not about the phone or the computer or the TV or being constantly in demand,

It’s about how YOU use all of that.

Your mobile phone can be a power of good, if you’re aware.

My personal rule for mobile phones?

If there’s someone else in the room - and it’s not a waiting room or a bus stop room,

Get off my phone.

Talk, practice the art of conversation.

And it is an art.

You don’t do it, it dies.

Never a mobile phone in bed.

Great time for some “connecting” of at least one variety …

That is a wonderful way of making sure my relationship stays alive and vibrant and close.

You see, all of this is a choice.

Your whole life is a choice.

You may not realise where your choice lies, exactly - but just seeing that you play a role in all of it is a huge step forward.

When you do want more choice, you might be interested in this:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Keep the peace!

Arjuna

Go Easy On Yourself

I just spent a wonderful day with a group down in Worcester. Beautiful location with awesome, inspiring ladies -

A group of Super Mums,

(and they were - they had capes and all, I swear!)

All wanting to be better.

To be more fun, more flexible and fluid, more productive in their lives.

Don’t we all?

(Hope so if you’re reading this!)

It became apparent that in the pursuit of being better we can be pretty hard on ourselves.

You know?

And sometimes you know you could do better.

You know you let yourself down. Maybe someone else too.

And reacted, speaking angrily, or ditched your fitness regime or diet or whatever.

But - it’s no deal, honestly.

Just get up and go again when you’re ready.

Yelling at yourself, beating yourself up, calling yourself an idiot?

I know that inner voice ^^^

Mine was particularly nasty.

It does you no good at all.

Does it?

Give yourself a break.

High expectations and goals are wonderful -

But realise it’s going to take time and persistence to wear down some habits.

They're just old patterns. It's the old you, the one you're leaving behind.

No deal,

Just don’t stop.

Therefore getting better is not so much about talent or skill or even motivation.

It’s about gentle persistence that gets there because it’s unstoppable.

No rush, no pressure to achieve, just a certain will to do what you can do today to get there.

Today is a write off?

Not a problem.

Leave it.

Go again tomorrow.

No one, no one at all does anything full on, all the time.

Some people would like you to believe they do -

But they don’t, simply because they can’t.

Slow and steady gets there.

Getting up again does it.

Putting it down to learning - not failure, not wrong again - will make it so enjoyable and simple you cannot NOT get there.

OK?

Keep on.

You got this.

Keep the peace! Arjuna

PS.

Oh - almost forgot!

If you want a beautifully simple and fun way of retraining your brain away from harshness and self-violence,

This could be just the thing you’ve been looking for:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ 

Avoiding Petty Stuff That Creates Havoc

Baby names - what a nightmare. Baby is 4 weeks old and she has no moniker.

Well, she has plenty of nicknames:

Missy, Shrimpy, Monkey Bum …

But nothing official.

Trouble is I suggest something and Sumati recoils in horror (as is her manner when I come up with a really good idea)

It’s apparent I’ve suggested something on par with “Adolf” or “Trumpina” or “Wartface” or some such.

Sumati suggests something and I politely tell her what it rhymes with -

Because my brain works like that,

And she, again, recoils in horror telling me that no one in their right mind will think of that, and why did she marry me anyway?

Except I did, and I bet someone else will, and she said yes to my proposal so it’s all far too late (nyah a ha!!)

So I’ve kind of stopped suggesting names.

The lesson behind all of this?

Sometimes you just have to give up.

Especially in relationships, you know?

I see so many people fighting over nothing,

Over wanting to prove their point really.

And yet in wanting to be right,

Happiness and harmony gets chucked out the window,

You end up arguing so much you forget why you liked the person in the beginning anyway.

Sure, you pick your battles.

But when you start prioritising your peace you realise your “I must be right on this one particular point” really is a very small list indeed.

When you're at peace your significant others are at peace too -

So it’s not a selfish thing at all,

Though some people think so:

“I’m getting stressed because I want you to have the best life”

Kids and partner, dogs and goldfish,

They actually all want you to be happy and at peace.

It enables them a point of reference in this sometimes crazy, chaotic world.

An anchor of stability.

An oasis of calm, and love, and good humour.

So they can remember theirs.

Want that?

It’s a skill - a skill you can develop.

Here’s the way to get “peace fit”:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Keep the peace! Arjuna

PS.

Imagine your partner and/or family, how would life be if they were all at peace.

Wouldn’t that be fun?

Wouldn’t that be smooth and drama free?

Yes indeedy.

Now you can’t make your loved ones like that, but you protecting your peace is the biggest thing you can do to help them get that.

Actions speak louder than words.

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ 

Screaming Babies Incoming At 3 O’clock

Having a three week old baby has shown me something, very very useful. She’s the perfect thing to develop more mastery of my own mind and reactions -

Getting super good at how to choose my response to challenge, and all with a smile - even at 3am.

Let me tell you:

Challenge is part of life.

How YOU deal with it is everything to your results and how much fun you have.

People talk about how sweet and innocent the little baby is,

And she is pretty darn cute, most of the time (she came from after all - natch!)

But she’s also got a will of iron.

She wants something?

She’ll be very loud until she gets it.

(Unfortunately the diagnostic panel isn’t working so it can take some time to work out what that is)

There is no end of possible challenge here.

Avoidance isn't an option in life. You can’t run - you can’t hide.

I can’t ditch this baby.

I can’t run to a cave.

Well, I could, but the truth is no matter where you go you’ll find something you disagree with.

A dank cave with nothing but leaves and roots to chew on?

That’ll get old quick.

The best way, the most productive way, is to learn how to deal with stuff you don’t like.

And this is where you have an advantage -

If you’re reading this, you’re interested in doing things better.

Better is good.

You see - you can blame and point the finger all you like …

“It’s the baby’s fault I’m stressed!”

“It’s the world’s fault I’m stressed!”

Or you can look at yourself and see what you can do differently.

A big difference.

One is weak. One will keep you in a cycle of complaining and blaming and doing nothing but getting stressed.

The other is strong.

You’re looking at yourself and seeing how you can free yourself from the chains of reaction.

You know there is the event: “Baby crying at 3am!”

And there is your reaction to the event: “mrgggghhh - wtf?!”

The event you have little control over -

The reaction?

All the control in the world.

One you can change, one you can’t.

If you’re smart, and you are - you’ll work on the things you can change.

You’ll realise that getting stressed and overwhelmed is not a good option.

But mastery of yourself?

An excellent one.

It can be done - it takes patience and consistency.

And it takes humility - a willingness to look at yourself.

Not many people have that ^^^

It also takes a tool that means you can ignore certain thoughts and reactions,

And choose to focus on thoughts that you do want to grow.

Head here to get such a “tool”:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Go well!

Arjuna

PS.

Baby is an amazing teacher of choosing to be flexible.

Amazing.

I have a plan, she fills her nappy.

Hah - dirty nappies come first, no matter what I want to do.

The Secret Of Happy People

As my wife has a small human attached to her breast most of the day it seems, I have been run around boy.

Fetching and getting and plumping pillows and cooking and changing nappies.

Previously I would have hated that.

“What about ME? What about what I want to do?” …

I would have moaned and whinged …

In the process causing myself great dissatisfaction and stress,

And further destabilising my relationship by being a grumpy selfish bugger.

I’ve learnt many things about the power of giving in my time as an Ishaya monk.

You see the research has shown, time and time again, that the secret of very happy people is giving.

All super content, satisfied and fulfilled folk have found a ways of regularly being of service.

It is also an antidote to depression, anxiety, stress and certain effects of old age:

Simply helping someone else out.

Why?

Well, take for example cooking a meal for your family.

An attitude of giving means what was previously a chore, perhaps even a pain in the arse, becomes totally different.

It becomes a feel good thing - a chance to nurture and help and spread some love to your family.

Which is nice because your loved ones win,

But more importantly, YOU win because you’ve flipped your attitude around.

The same thing that NEEDS to be done becomes a opportunity NOT a drain.

Do you see what I mean?

It's more than that -

You ALSO become fully present on the task in front of you,

Not wishing you were somewhere else in some imagined place that you imagine will bring you more enjoyment.

You're not hurrying to the next moment before it's even got here,

You see what needs to be done, you can meet the need of this moment.

In giving every act has the chance to become enjoyable - every single moment.

And that’s not all.

Not only do you drop the constant chase to get somewhere else,

Your problems?

They get bigger and bigger when you’re self-absorbed in them, when you’re IN them, thinking and chuntering and struggling.

But you actually forget them when you’re giving.

Honestly you do - because you get out of your own head, you get out of your problems, you get out of self-absorption and pity and the “poor me’s”.

The more you give, the more you get perspective and relief from all that stuff.

So find ways to give!

You get extraordinarily happy extraordinarily quickly,

Lose stress and struggle on the way,

Realise that you are richer than you ever knew,

And also create really vibrant, alive, close relationships.

Don’t take my word for it, do it and see what happens.

Sound interesting to you?

It’s all part of the benefits to your life you’ll find when you jump into this Ishayas’ Ascension meditation business.

Head this way and I'll tell you more:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Go well,

Arjuna “How Can I Help?” Ishaya

- PS.

Seriously, how can I help you?

Just ask.

You help me help myself.

A Bit Of Honesty?

OK, so I am nearly there with my computer. It’s been giving me grief.

We had one of “those” chats.

A clearing of the air, if you like.

And I think we’re back on better ground for moving forward.

Honesty and clarity is important in any relationship.

But not at the expense of appreciation and gratitude …

You know what I mean?

I know a couple who like to clear the air regularly.

Like every single day …

It’s a nightmare to be around -

Because it’s all based on “you change, no YOU change” …

They forget - regularly - to mention why they like each other, why they got married in the first place.

Dude, that gets old quick - just watching it.

Anyways - this wasn't going to be about relationships.

But seeings as I’m on a roll …

I know guys in particular don’t like to talk about this stuff.

It’s to their loss.

Simply because they don’t know how relationships work.

Especially at home.

Many guys expect everything to be amazing just because they go home at night and put bacon on the table.

Then they’re left scratching their heads when their wives and partners want more and so run off with the milkman.

If you get that bit about appreciation and gratitude then your relationship and your life will be so much easier.

You’ll have a solid foundation for when you need to be straight and honest.

But the bottom line is - everyone likes to be liked.

It’s not quite manipulation, and yet …

heh heh, evil master mind stuff here,

If you let them know how much you do like them, they will be willing to move mountains for you.

This “works” in your romantic relationship, with your kids …

But I saw it first in my job.

I would do anything for this one boss.

Simply because he took the time to tell me what a good job I was doing and how valued I was - and often.

When he had things he’d like me to do differently or had some overtime he needed doing?

I jumped on that. No hesitation.

I was young and impressionable - but I tried the exact same thing with the guys under me.

The result?

We had the best team at work -

We were slick and smooth and efficient, and just as importantly we had a TON of fun.

It was obvious to our clients as well. They commented on it endlessly.

A relationship is founded on what you bring to it.

It all begins with you - giving (probably more importantly - remembering to give).

It’s worth it: what you give tends to be what you get back.

So there you go - one big tangent this morning.

If you’d like the skills to make appreciation and gratitude and having really quite wonderful relationships an everyday “it’s just what I do” part of your life?

Go here and we'll get you started:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

Keep the peace! Arjuna

-

£300 - On Goldfish Surgery!

So the Daily Mail tells me that a family has spent £300 on vet bills - To fix their ailing 20 year old … goldfish.

Such a tiny thing, and so expensive!

Mind you, the Daily Mail has just been excluded from Wikipedia’s list of trusted sources of truth,

So you never do know do you?

The comments after the story were loaded with people saying what a waste of money it was.

But here’s the thing that I liked about this family:

Priorities.

They said “Goldie” - (not actually sure that is the fish's real name) -

Was important to the whole family and so it was a no brainer (to use a Kevin Bacon-ism) to spend the cash.

Good on them.

To some people it’s important to spend their hard earned dosh on cigarettes or Sky TV or new trainers or whatever …

For me it’s pork pies, from the Noted Pie Shop.

(If you’re ever in Darlo or Richmond you probably know what I’m talking about)

but - who is to say what should be important to you?

It’s a good sign of your priorities though, isn’t it?

What you spend money on -

And what you spend time on.

Time and money.

If you want to work out what’s happening in your life and why,

Look there first.

Because it will show you what you are prioritising, what you put your energy into.

Prioritising your mindset, your attitude and your freedom of choice?

Is a worthwhile “investment” -

Simply because it gives you so much in return.

It’s the foundation to your whole entire life.

Quite simply, with a solid foundation -

Not only can you combat stress and struggle and self-sabotage and exhaustion,

Meaning you can enjoy being calm and clear and content and creative,

(So many ‘C’s!’)

But you’re great to be around.

So many people I teach Ascension meditation tell me that it’s their partners and kids that tell them to go practice,

To prioritise it -

Simply because they’re nicer and less grumpy and more inspiring to be with.

If you know how to Ascend?

Make sure you practice.

Let me know if you need help with that. I have a cool little system to make it a habit.

If you don’t know how?

Well, by golly, you’re missing out.

Head this way and I'll get your started on meditation and we'll talk more about this Ishayas' Ascension meditation business:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Have a lovely day! Arjuna

Cause And Direct Effect

Let’s talk chicken and egg. What came first?

What caused what?

Cause and effect -

Or karma in some places,

is a wonderful thing to get clear on.

Because then you can see where you have choice and where you don’t.

Life is ALL about choice.

And getting truly FREE choice - 

Removed from all your self-imposed limitations

Of bad habits,

Dodgy internal programming,

And snappy, reactive, trigger based emotional responses,

Is what the Ishayas’ Ascension is all about.

(and what other meditations SHOULD be about but often fail to provide an effective means to do that)

Ooh - was that a little … bitchy?

Probably. I know I’m biased, I am.

But I know what I like, and I like what I know.

Maybe I'm just a bit grumpy this morning.

(Do you know what? -

"Standard” meditation is so much harder to teach than Ascension meditation? Super simple, Ascension takes the person by the hand and directly points them where they need to go. Which makes it quickly obvious for the person practicing. Which is great for everyone!)

Anyhoo - got a little distracted there:

Ascension meditation is about wiping your slate clean so you can put whatever you want on it.

Choice -

What causes ongoing suffering?

An event?

Or your reaction to it?

An event - such as stepping on your kids Lego, right up to being diagnosed with cancer (let’s say for dramatic effect)

The event may be painful.

It may cause short term shock and physical pain.

BUT …

The long term suffering comes from your reaction to it.

—-> The ongoing processing and thinking and chewing over it.

Like a scab you keep picking, it never heals and just gets full of pus and scar.

Yuck.

People think events cause suffering.

Thus they are controlled by these external, uncontrollable events, which trigger a response in them.

Like a monkey on a chain, being pulled this way and that.

But if you see this within yourself,

You can start to unchain yourself from the effect of painful events,

Gain control of what you can control,

And therefore avoiding suffering.

Being free from suffering?

Imagine that …

You may still not like the event -

No one likes being told they have cancer.

No one likes standing on Lego in the dark.

but it doesn’t cause continual mental and emotional … (and from that physical - because the body follows the mind) … suffering.

Life can be tough.

But you make it absurdly tougher because of your habits of choice.

Reclaim a better, easier, less dramatic, more fun way of living and responding and choosing!

What do you have to do to have a life where you are free from suffering?

Go here:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Keep the peace now.

Arjuna

PS.

Just wanted to say hello and thanks for reading this far.

Good on you!

Let me know if there's ever anything I can do for you.

True! Just send me a msg.

Trust What You Know - You Already Know

Last week I was talking about challenges. It’s interesting because you know the habits and programmes and challenges that face you.

And many of you also already know, because you told me -

You kind of already know how to get around these challenges.

You know a lot -

It's just that sometimes it takes someone else to tease it out of you.

And also -

Quite often life turns into a little bit of survival mode,

Just getting through the day - heading for the weekend.

Rare is it that we take time to really sit back and get clear on the important stuff.

On where we want to go and how.

Taking time to rest and see and be clear - getting an overview - is so valuable.

Without it you turn into a little rodent on a wheel.

Round and around and around you go.

You may know I’m going to say this -

But my Ishayas’ Ascension meditation practice gives this to me just in terms of a mini-break during the day.

A complete physical and mental rest which means I reset.

Perspective is regained -

Just through resting, disconnecting for a moment or two.

It is a luxury to some, to be able to take even 10 minutes.

But all because they don't realise how necessary it is to stop and get perspective.

They think - get jobs done then rest.

It never happens.

Does it?

You go in smaller and smaller circles.

From that, if you’re smart, and you ARE because you’re reading this -

You might realise the benefit of stopping and getting such an overview.

Because you already know what to do, what you WANT to do, and how to do it.

It’s just that it always gets pushed back, time and time again, for the hustle and bustle of doing stuff.

Carve out the time - you need it.

To help with this I think you should learn and practice Ascension meditation.

It is super simple -

And brings great clarity and perspective.

It doesn't take away your problems - it makes them easier to deal with.

Opt in here and I'll give you everything you need to know,

Starting with a free super simple Quick Start guide to meditation:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ Go well!

Arjuna

PS.

Your intuition often tells you what is right for you in a particular moment.

It just gets over run, doesn’t it?

Another valuable reason to stop and see and rest and gain some space -

So you trust what you know.

An incredible gift.

PPS.

Next Ishayas’ Ascension meditation course date is set -

12-14 May (starts 7pm Friday)

Note the date down in the diary,

Email me if you want a place.

Bookings will open as soon as I organise myself free of some boxes …

soon!

Do You Hate Mistakes Too?

I don’t know about you but I’ve made some mistakes. The trouble with mistakes is not in the making of them, but the harshness and criticism that goes along with them.

The head is a vicious little bugger …

If you excuse the term,

But I think it’s a suitable one as your mind can be so incredibly violent.

Trouble is - you never learn anything if you don’t make mistakes.

Right?

But if you listened to your head you wouldn’t ever do anything to put yourself in a place where you would learn anything.

Make sense?

It’s not fear of failure - to be more precise it’s fear of other people witnessing your failure.

I can fail in private all I like and it doesn’t matter -

It’s when you step up and try something and fail in public,

That’s when the mind wants you to cease and desist and “what were you thinking anyway?”

If you listened to your head you would stay the same, forever.

That’s ok for some, and I FULLY understand why -

But I think it’s not for you because you’re reading this,

And you want more from life than staying the same.

The rewards of managing the brutality of your own thoughts are huge.

I think that’s pretty obvious.

One side effect that is relatively unknown though -

Is that you become more understanding and less judgemental of others.

You get nicer to yourself and more forgiving and patient and knowing of how you tick -

And it automatically follows.

You become a better parent, leader, teacher, mentor, friend to any one.

Because you’re living it.

You’re IN it.

I can’t recommend learning and practicing meditation enough.

It truly is a life saver -

And means you can do the things you want to do while managing the self-sabotage as it tries to come.

The Ishayas’ Ascension meditation in particular is easy and simple and powerful, and enjoyable to practice as well.

Learn it and jump in: practice it and see how far it’ll take you.

Interested in more?

Go here and we'll get you started with a free guide to meditation.

Simple, powerful, easy to follow:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/

Go well! Arjuna

PS.

Mistakes are essential things.

Unpleasant to the ego -

But pleasant when you get used to being uncomfortable in that.

A small trade off - a slight squeeze, but one that boosts you forward.

If you’re watching and interested, that is ...

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