Don’t let any idea of who you should be get in the way of being who you actually are.
Is "normal" life that safe?
Go and live!
Creating sanctuary from the storm – for everyone
Don’t make your mind the enemy
Arrive
Wonder Woman
I went to the movies for the first time in months.
Bunked off work,
And on a super sunny afternoon we strolled into the cinema.
Wonder Woman if you must know.
No great cultural masterpiece, but how wonderful and entertaining.
How cool to be out at the movies!
Set free from regularity and the "same old same old".
Skipping work and going out and playing.
Just like the old days.
Innocence, the joy of simple things, play.
I figure if you learn to enjoy the simple stuff, the big stuff will be amazing.
But you have to be in that frame of mind, in that attitude.
You gotta have your eyes open and notice.
Otherwise you just miss out as you speed from task to task.
And that would be a shame because you end up speeding through everything and missing out on life itself.
So my words for today are innocence and notice ... and play.
Take a breath, take a moment.
Be aware.
Life is good. Enjoy it.
Go well! Arjuna
PS.
Here's a ton of ideas of how,
A free 7 page guide with 108 simple ideas to keep it simple, no less:
Give and take
Just went for a run.
I'm in Cornwall, and so of course I'm scoffing cream teas.
Cos that's what you have to do in Cornwall.
And I love clotted cream, you see.
And in order to eat many of these delights, as well as the fish n chips and all that good holiday food,
I went for a run up and over some serious coastal paths,
To help my digestion and my appetite.
Balance.
If I did nothing but ate at the rate I'm used to I'd be the size of a house.
Which is fine if I'm ok with being like that -
But I don't want to.
So balance.
Give and take.
Karma, perhaps if you like the meaning being used in terms of cream tea.
It's a necessary in every part of life.
If you're busy working and managing a family,
You need to take time to recharge.
Regularly - To recuperate and retune.
You can't keep taking from your internal "bank account" without giving some back.
Otherwise you fall over.
You don't fall over straight away, but you do start to get frazzled, don't you?
Life gets a bit serious and a bit fraught.
A bit snappy.
You miss out on the simple pleasures.
The things that make life profound.
So if you value your sanity,
If you want to choose to have a good life -
(And the good life IS your choice)
You need to stop and recharge.
How?
Head this way and I'll show you exactly how:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb
Give and take - balance.
Do and don't do ...
Makes all the difference.
Go well! Arjuna
PS. Ascenders!
You have 2 weeks until your day is here.
Why not?
You give a day of your time, and it gives you so much more:
Difficult to practice
Had an email recently,
It said that what I talk about is difficult to practice.
And I get that.
Being appreciative, accepting, self- loving, trusting, compassionate, patient, fun with a great sense of humour …
Is all tricky to do -
In and of themselves.
And if you already feel like you’re trying to be the perfect mum,
For example,
All of this can seem like another nail in the coffin,
Another load to add to your back,
Another standard to live up to -
Of all the things you have to do,
And are good at forgetting and failing at.
Do you know what I mean?
But here is the answer to all questions in life:
Get present,
And everything flowers from that.
Get full of your own presence and awareness,
And you become more of everything -
More alive, more calm, more content, more creative,
Less overwhelmed, frazzled, harsh and judgemental of yourself.
It’s a wonderful thing -
A “buy one, get a million things free” type deal.
So don’t worry too much about all the things you have to “be” (as well as do),
(Though if you realise you have a choice and can choose to be more appreciative? How wonderful)
Just get full of presence.
Keep it this simple,
And life transforms from that.
Hurrah for simplicity.
Here's a bunch of simple, different ways to be more present and mindful,
If you were interested:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb Go well! Arjuna
PS.
And Ascenders already have the ultimate tool in simplicity,
If you’d like a whole day to remind yourself, to inspire to greater heights?
Here you go!
Acceptance
Got sent a really nice quote,
I’m a sucker for good words you see,
______________
“One does not walk into the forest and accuse the trees of being off centre nor do they visit the shore and call the waves imperfect. Why then, do we look at ourselves that way?”
~ Author Unknown ____________
Acceptance is the basis for all goodness.
Ironically too - when there’s true acceptance,
That opens up the space for transformation,
For change.
Struggling with something?
Accept - fully and completely.
It’s the stepping back that means you can get peace,
And perspective.
Then you can go from there.
Alright?
Good - go well! Arjuna
PS.
Need help with any of this?
Try this free guide, packed full of ideas:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb
Ascenders!
Don't miss this day, just for you.
They don’t come along very often:
The one thing you might do …
If you simply stay with what’s happening right in front of you,
Stay tuned into that -
Realise when you’re racing and getting stressed about it,
And come back to the level,
You’ll have a very happy, calm, effective life. True!
Losing overwhelm, thinking too much, reacting wildly, feeling guilty and regretting ...
The end to that begins right now.
That’s what it’s all about isn't it?
Living well.
Living well = attend to now.
Just now.
Keep it simple, ok?
Go well!
Arjuna
PS.
Want other tips like this one?
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb
PPS.
And if you Ascend?
A whole day for you to remember and be inspired about how simple this really is:
19 Things That Don’t Work
When I was a confused teenager (and adult actually),
Full of angst and self-doubt,
Looking for a tribe to belong to,
Some kind of purpose to get behind,
I often wished there was a guide book to life.
Or some sense of “live like this and everything will turn out right”.
Ya know?
Many adults are still searching for that sweet spot too -
While you actually find that within,
And so there is NO book of guidance,
Here’s some things I see that clearly don’t work: ____________
1. Bottling stuff up, not talking Resentment then explodes spectacularly, taking heads off
2. Talking too much Because there is a time to move on and talking about it endlessly is a pain in the bottom for all concerned.
3. Forgetting what is really important to you Leaving your priorities until last (which means never)
4. Taking stuff too seriously Good sign you’re getting too stressed and/or tired
5. Focussing on what’s wrong, what’s missing and totally missing all that is right and good!
6. Ignoring what’s wrong Sticking your head in the ground in the hope it will go away just gives you dirty nostrils
7. Being harsh with yourself Go on, whip yourself again and see if that helps
8. Holding grudges Eats you up quicker than a stomach ulcer
9. Maintaining ridiculous expectations of yourself (and others actually) You are you are you and while goals are awesome, take a chill pill. And who are you doing it for anyway?
10. Comparison Not so it inspires as in “well, if she can do it, so can I” but so it hurts
11. “Should” (Could and would should be there too)
12. Spending all your time in the past or the future Because life is happening under your nose
13. Worrying about what you can’t control As useful as hitting your head against a brick wall
14. Giving into fear and therefore not doing what you CAN control Not doing and avoidance isn't a path to happiness
15. Fighting, resisting, blaming Because that helps in the face of an undeniable reality ...
16. Gossip It’s only to make yourself feel and seem better - there could be other, better ways, ya think?
17. Feeling guilty for doing stuff that recharges you Why exercise or close your eyes to meditate or read a book when you could be scrubbing the floor?
18. Forgetting to laugh Life's too short for laughing
19. Forgetting to speak out your gratitude and appreciation They can't read your mind _______
There you go ....
And so - what shall you do about it?
I would personally:
Get present, get truly mindful.
Then that will show you when any of the above pop up.
It becomes super clear.
Your regular practice to close your eyes teaches you how to live the best version of you.
Like a block of ice melting in a hot bath,
Your habits and pattens leave you.
But you gotta get in the bath regular so it happens.
Want more help on that?
You got it ——————> https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb
Go well Arjuna
PS.
Ascenders!
No excuses:
A whole day for you.
These don't happen very often.
A champion of the world
A buddy of mine died during the week.
A fellow Ishaya, he’d kept his cancer quiet, he didn’t want anyone to know.
I just assumed I would see him again this year, but no.
So much for assumptions huh?
A sterling dude with a huge heart -
He was built like many North American guys I know,
About as wide as he was tall,
Solid as a brick dunny.
I remember coming around a corner once and bumping into him -
Bouncing would be a better word for I hit this man wall and flew back some way.
Huge man, huge smile, huge heart, huge compassion.
He had an amazing journey.
He was an US soldier and did tours in Iraq and Afghanistan.
What he saw and did affected him greatly,
So much so by the time he stopped being a soldier he was “a bit of a mess” -
All the drugs and the doctors and the specialised counselling couldn’t put him together again.
As a bit of a last chance effort he learnt to Ascend,
And the more he practiced the more he found he could put his skeletons behind him.
His levels of medication dropped and dropped and kept dropping until he could quit everything the doctors had him on.
At that point - when I met him - I thought he was unstoppable.
The kind of guy who would live to be 100.
Full of energy, full of fun, full of love and lust for life,
The kind of life force that you often see in people who have had a second chance,
When given another opportunity they seize it and fully make the most of each and every moment.
Now-
I turn 43 this year.
There’s plenty of things I still want to do and get better at,
Things I want to experience and become.
I hope there’s plenty of future for me.
Yet I know,
I have no idea of how much time I actually have.
In this, it’s the simple things that mean a life becomes a Life,
Now - and not when I get x, y or z.
The appreciation, the gratitude, the love, the remembering to be alive and awake to this moment, the sense of presence and stillness at the core of my being …
Without those all the achieving in the world won’t mean anything.
With them, everything I do becomes satisfying, complete, full.
And then there’s room for more. Always more.
Whoever and whatever you are, no matter your history, you always have a choice.
It might not seem like it, but you do.
Find it, make the most of that choice - it is the one thing that changes everything.
It's the one thing that will make a difference, no matter what you do.
And so I say, with feeling,
Go well!
Arjuna
Have you ever … ?
Have you ever spent hours thinking about what they might be thinking?
And how you might counteract that?
I know.
You say one thing, they make a funny face and you think they think you’re a bit of an idiot,
Or maybe you’ve offended them somehow,
Then you get into thinking how you might make it better,
If you could send them a text with a clarification,
But perhaps that be too obvious?
So maybe you’ll try some other approach …
And it's true:
You ARE such an idiot, why did you have to say that?
I know.
You spend all night thinking about it,
And when you finally see them again they have no idea what you’ve been on about.
I know.
All that nervous energy and for what?
I used to do it a lot.
Needless and endless worry about what other people thought.
The way out is to learn to be able to put those thoughts down.
To let them go, as the popular parlance has it.
To do what you can when you can,
But until that moment, IF that moment happens
Stop stressing about stuff you have no control over.
Like other people's opinions.
Your mind is trying to help -
But it just ends up weighing you down.
Learn to master your mind and everything gets simple.
How might you do that?
Well -
This very short, but info packed and free guide that you can return to,
Time and time again,
Is what you want:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb
Go well! Arjuna
PS.
If you know how to Ascend -
Then this day will be a huge springboard to you being able to let go whenever you want:
Switching off a busy head thats getting frantic
Do you have a busy head, that thinks too much?
I know you do!
99% of all humans have a head that is far too busy.
And busy in a way that is full of stress and negativity.
Sleep problems are through the roof, mental illness and anxiety on the rise.
I heard that the average human thinks something like 70,000 thoughts a day.
At least.
Before the coffee kicks in.
Now, what to do?
How do you have a calm, nice head -
One that means you don’t feel guilty for spending a little bit of time for you,
That you don’t snap and react in ways you later regret (especially with your kids),
That means you don’t spend hours thinking about what they’re thinking about what you said (whew) ...
and how you might counteract that,
Getting deeper and deeper into that anxious feeling in the pit of your stomach.
You CAN sedate with gin and tonic and/or Facebook,
That works in the short term.
But you tend to be upping the intake of both and that’s not a great long term strategy is it?
Especially when you have young kids,
And you wake with that cotton wool fog ache from a little too much alcohol and social media well into the night.
The best way is all about distraction.
Which is nice - it’s not about force, it’s not about stopping your head,
It’s about giving yourself something else to focus on.
Which is super good because you can’t stop your mind thinking.
You think because you’re alive!
Alive, I tell you!
What helps is being aware of what you’re thinking about.
More mindful and present,
Because then you shift your attention sooner.
And not let the monkey between your ears build up momentum and become a run away train.
That’s why exercise helps SO much with stress.
You’re so focussed on just making it through your pilates or your run or your swim or your gym session.
Breathing becomes the only important thing -
But there are other ways too,
Faster, simpler, smoother ways at that.
Download this (for free) and it'll give you a bunch of ideas:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb
Go well! Arjuna
PS.
Ascenders have their own day workshop at the end of the month.
Times to retreat, even just a day are priceless to switching off
Happiness is having a bad memory
I saw that ^^^ on a coaster last weekend.
I guffawed.
Because it’s true.
Ignorance is bliss.
But not in the simplistic way you may think it is:
In reality,
What you focus on grows.
The ability to forget the bad and focus on the good?
Essential to happiness.
When I was depressed?
The other way around, it was.
(did that sound a little like Yoda?)
I forgot the good and could only remember the bad.
That’s why they say “think positive”
“They” being those people who say such things …
Because it’s a kind of mental and emotional fitness.
When you need it most,
It can come through.
But it’s totally true.
You direct your attention -
It doesn’t mean you’re being irresponsible and sticking your head in the sand,
Oh no,
You’re actually giving yourself solid perspective and foundation so you can deal with the bad simply and easily and with a light heart.
So give happiness a chance -
Forget!
Go well Arjuna
PS.
How do you forget?
Easier said than done, I know.
Let me help.
Click here and you can download numerous ways:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/
You’re an Ascender and want a whole day to learn how to forget?
Here you go:
Taking Your Own Advice?
“My husband is a pain in the ar$e and I’ve had enough … what shall I do?”
“How do I tell my kids about the Manchester bombings?”
“I need to ask my boss something and I’m not sure how to do it”
“How can I learn to say ‘no’ more?”
…
I get to talk with a lot of people about problems,
And I love it, I really do.
I get to help and I love that.
The funniest thing is that I’ve become aware that the source of all problems …
(I have a weird sense of humour - but it’s born of a joy in seeing how I am the cause of ALL my problems. I find it ironic or something ...)
Is NOT really confusion or uncertainty of knowing WHAT to do.
If you find yourself confused it’s highly likely you already know what to do,
The problem is that you’re not sure you CAN,
Or you SHOULD,
Or ---> “But what will people think?”
Or you’re asking for permission to do what you know you need to do.
That ^^^ is the kicker with all problems.
Not the lack of solution,
But the doubt about applying the solution.
Do you see the difference?
I know this because when I ask the person “what advice would you give your best friend on this issue?”
Out comes the wisdom and the solution … easy.
The hard bit is getting over yourself and just doing it.
The hard bit comes when you start over-thinking it.
The hard bit in all of life is not out there in the world, in the problem,
But here, upstairs, between your ears.
So when you master what's between your ears, all of life gets supremely simple.
And so, as I saw on Facebook the other day by a very wise man:
“What would happen if you took your own advice?”
I thought "how excellent!"
I’ll leave you with that.
Take it easy! Arjuna
PS.
Want an easy peasy way to start mastering your mind?
Have a look here, there's 108 ways in fact:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/
And advanced workshop day for Ascenders only
(correct link, fingers crossed!)
Make Sure You Enjoy This
A really cool thing about having a baby,
Is all the strangers wanting to stop and chat.
As well as a oogle at bubba.
So many people love little bubba!
And they take the chance to give advice -
“Ooh, it’s colic …”
“Do it like this and you won’t have to do it like that …”
I think I said this recently but the best advice we got was to ignore all advice.
And make it up as we go along.
But one piece of advice has been consistent - as well as good:
So many people stopping and saying:
“Make sure you enjoy this phase”
Which is super smart advice.
You see -
We all look for the next best thing.
Which is cool, but it’s at the expense of now.
Especially with a baby that is true.
So many mums feel like they're little more than furniture -
And can’t wait for the bubba to be more independent.
The focus on when things will be different means you miss out on right now.
Now is - at best - endured -
Or at worst, struggled through -
Until some future moment that - let’s face it - MIGHT be better.
A life lived through endurance at best and stress and struggle at worst?
Constantly in the future, wishing for something else?
That’s no life.
No one wants that.
See what you're doing here.
See where your attention is -
Enjoy this phase, because this is it.
This here is life itself.
If you do tune into what’s happening right in front of you?
Whatever is happening gets simple and stress free, and even fun, no matter what mayhem and chaos it may contain.
The future might be better, but now?
Just dandy, thanks.
Good stuff,
Go well! Arjuna
PS.
Want to know how to enjoy each and every moment?
Free from thinking too much, free from overwhelm, regret and guilt, and enjoying more time in your busy day?
This free guide will help you in so many different ways.
Get a copy here:
Standing In Your Own Stink
You have to excuse me,
I’m feeling a little feisty today.
This blog may seem a little harsh,
But in no way is it intended to be.
^^^^^
And in fact, if you are of a certain mindset you will actually find it inspiring,
So let's go:
Life is short.
It’s never seemed shorter.
Bombs. War. Soldiers on the streets of the UK.
Not sure where any of it’s coming from, what will happen next.
Uncertainty - as always - is always around, but it seems more uncertain than ever before -
Given that,
What do YOU want from YOUR life?
Are you interested in living a life that is worth living, squeezing the most from it?
Free of stress and struggle, full of freedom of choice, independent of being pulled like a monkey on a chain, dynamic and alive and fun … ?
Or are you happy to spend your time here on the planet small and pointing the finger at everyone else:
Blaming, judging, complaining and being fearful, stressed and miserable … ?
You see,
You HAVE to decide what you want.
And IF you decide to make the most of your time here, you need to realise something:
__________
"I've never seen any life transformation that didn't begin with the person in question finally getting tired of their own bullshit.”
- Liz Gilbert __________
You are the source of all your problems.
And when you get tired of your own stories, then and only then can you move on from them.
Being sick of the negativity of your own mind is a good thing.
Getting tired of spinning around, thinking too much, flapping, reacting, being stressed and worried and anxious is a good thing.
Seeing all the past choices that you’re a bit ashamed of IS a good thing.
Because then you can do something about it.
And what a celebration that is,
For it is the beginning of freedom.
Well done you.
Go well! Arjuna
PS.
If you’d like help with this?
Here is a bunch of ideas:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/ PPS.
If you did find this harsh, perhaps just take a moment and ask yourself:
“Why did I react in such a way?”
There might be something in it for you.
But if you’re not prepared to admit that perhaps you make your own choices,
And therefore you could be responsible for how you feel,
Then these emails won’t make you any happier.
Life is too short to read stuff that doesn’t enliven you in some way.
Daily Doings
What are your rituals, your daily doings that make sure you live the life you WANT to live,
Rather than a life you kind of stumble through?
What do you do that reminds you of the bigger picture?
That allows you the headspace and perspective that means you don’t get triggered and react like a flailing drunk at 3am?
What are the things that you do that give you quality of life?
That mean you’re more mindful and present, rather than in a past or a future you have no control over?
Fresh and recharged, feeling like you’re on top of things rather than struggling to stay afloat?
More appreciative and grateful, rather than judgemental and stressed and focussed on what’s wrong?
More understanding and compassionate, rather than judgemental and prejudiced?
More good humoured, with an ease and a smile on your lips, rather than snappy and grouchy?
Life is short.
What do you know you should do but don’t?
What aren’t you doing that you could do?
I know all these things take a bit of time - but done right they give MORE time, every time.
Seems like everyone has time for surfing Facebook or Instagram …
But no time for the truly important things.
Why not change that around?
You have the power to change your whole approach to life.
And you PROBABLY already know what to do, it’s just that you’re not doing it.
If you need help on the what or making sure of your daily doings, head this way for a whole collection of quick ideas that is free to you:
https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb/
Keep the peace!
Arjuna