How about a four day work week for you?

I see a business recently introduced a four day work week (for five day's pay) across the board for all their employees. Before the six-month trial, just over 50% said they were balancing work and life demands. During the 4 day work week it jumped up to 78%. Stress dropped, commitment and productivity increased.

It’s kinda obvious though, isn’t it?

Less time at work means you can do the things you want to do at home. Being paid to work five days when you work four means the financials are the same, you just have more space.

The question that came for me is, “Would you work less for less stress and way better work-life balance but also less money??”

Would you?

Would you quit that job in the city with the hour commute each way for a lesser paid job that meant when you got home you could actually see your kids rather than them be in bed, asleep?

Would you refuse to answer emails and work calls outside of business hours so you could fully and completely be with your family and loved ones in the evenings, as opposed to constantly being at work even when you’re at home?

What's your "Would you?" ... ?

The next question then is, when is it going to stop?

So many people I know talk about when, as in I’ll do something different “when and then” … when I pay off my debts then …, when I get that promotion then …, when I then I … humans in general live a life of when.

Tomorrow never comes does it? Your goal posts always shift. Which means “then” never happens. Sometimes you have to make when and then now … if you truly want it to happen.

I have no easy answers on this one, no simple follow your heart advice. I know what it’s like to have to work to get cash to pay the bills and then get back to work again because the bills aren’t stopping.

But I also know what it’s like to feel I have to work a job and/or conform to a particular working culture because there are no other options – when in reality, there are plenty of options, I’m just too scared to take them.

I also know contentment and space and peace and enjoyment and balance is worth more than any money.

Changing your life situations is sometimes necessary, but also changing your attitude is just the ticket.

Being present, not focusing on all the things you have to do and getting overwhelmed, is key. Stopping to smell the roses and appreciating all the things you do have instead of constantly chasing the next thing is also a huge part of it.

Working out what is truly important to you – to you – what you’re prepared to do and not do, is another chunk of it. Then you know when it’s time to say NO to one thing so you can say YES to everything else.

So often it appears as if there is no alternative. ut there always is. There always is. It’s just that it’s sometimes unknown – and that can be a little scary. Jumping in a taking a small step into the unknown is worth everything though. And you can always go back!

Go well! Arjuna

PS. I guess what I’m saying is examining your life, your attitudes, your ways of doing things is such a great idea. Taking time, regularly, to see if your life is happening the way you want it to is super valuable.

No one wants to be caught on a hamster wheel, but if you live unconsciously that certainly seems to happen, and quickly.

So stop – take stock. Talk about these things with your loved ones. It might be the most important change you make, and let me know how it goes for you.

PPS.

My six month coaching transformation programme “200% of life” is starting up.

If you want to transform your relationship with your mind and all aspects of your life, to have focus, fun and freedom (and never again bewildered, miserable and stuck) then this is for you.

Get in touch and I’ll give you more details!

Perfectionism, scared of “wrong,” mistakes and failure … advice from the top

If you’re at all interested in the goings on of a tiny nation at the bottom of the world called New Zealand, like I am, you will know that the Prime Minister gave birth recently. How she runs a country and looks after a baby I know not. My hat is well and truly doffed to her. She must have some kind of superpower that I don’t possess. And a husband that is well and truly “in” and helping out.

I read an interview with said husband, a bloke (don't worry – all men in NZ are “blokes”) whose face in pictures is something to behold as he hobnobs with world leaders. He’s like a kid who expects to be discovered at any moment and kicked out, crossed with sheer awe how he managed to gain entrance in the first place. Then there’s the one where he’s with the rest of the leaders’ significant others, a man in a sea of women. Wonderful.

He was talking about favourite pieces of parenting advice... now, mine is don’t listen to any advice (which, ironically, is superb advice), but second best came from this interview.

Apparently while hobnobbing with the Obamas, Barack told him his secret to parenting (and presumably running a country?) is to not panic, and it’s ok to make mistakes.

Isn’t that cool?

The fact is, and this coincides nicely with an article in the paper the other morning …

(https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/jul/17/my-brain-feels-like-its-been-punched-the-intolerable-rise-of-perfectionism)

… that talks about the rise of perfectionism and the crushing pressure it puts an increasing number of people under.

To me? Perhaps it's more to it than this, I am no psychologist (I can barely spell the word), but perfectionism is just another aspect of being afraid of making mistakes, afraid of failure.

A healthy concern for not messing up is a good thing me thinks … But if you, like me, have experienced being terrified of making any decision in case it’s the “wrong” one, or falling on my face in front of an audience of people, you will realise how de-habilitating being scared of mistakes is.

You’d rather hide and do nothing than put yourself in the way of “wrong” or “failure.”

But that’s not a life is it? I’ve learnt you have to get comfortable with the fact that you will make mistakes. In doing anything, you will mess up.

Here’s where YOUR choice comes in:

You can have the attitude that a mistake is further evidence of the end of the world, of your failure and your uselessness … or you can use it as a platform to get better, to improve, to learn from.

One is a downward spiralling mess of an attitude, the other gives you peace now, and firm ground for the future.

How do you change your attitude? Just through practice and presence. Through being aware of your mind and how it will always throw up these perfectionisms and expectations and ideas and insistences and shoulds.

When you are aware of them you have choice, you can ignore them and do something different. But being aware of them is a most excellent thing. You may not like that, I understand that, but without awareness it’s like trying to play tennis against an invisible opponent … almost impossible.

Through awareness you get to see your opponent and learn their wiley ways. A great thing – I get this might not be a comfortable thing, especially if your habit is to try and hide in some aspects of your life.

Knowing your own mind and being able to direct it where you wish is the key to a peaceful and effective life. Closing your eyes and being able to develop freedom of choice is essential.

Meditation then is one of the most important things you can regularly do. You’re not dropping out, you’re actually tuning in to the fullest degree.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. My new baby, a six month mind transformation programme (which I don’t have a name for yet) is due to be launched in the near future.

To be honest, I’m still sorting out details.

But it involves working closely with me over a long period of time and discovering how to transcend the limitations and judgements of your mind.

I went with six months because alongside guidance from me, time spent at the “coal face” practicing awareness and choice is essential. I wish I could give you a magic pill, but I can’t (and even those have un-wanted side effects). I can guide you, but you have to do the simple, and enjoyable, “work.”

If you’re interested?

Just hit reply and I’ll let you know all the details as soon as possible.

How to be free from suffering and live the meaning of life

Wanna be free? Never have a problem ever again? Free of all suffering and stress and anxiety? Love every single moment of your life?

Grab a cup, but gird yourself because it’s a bold idea and you might dislike some of it.

Here’s how:

There are zero problems here, now, in this moment. Honestly. All your suffering vanishes – all of it – when you fully immerse yourself in the presence of Now.

This is a huge idea – and as I said, your mind may hate it – but it doesn’t make it un-true.

Let’s investigate: Assume this moment is the only moment there is. Get super present, be aware of now. Be innocent and fresh. Drop all expectations, insistences, resistances and just meet this moment face to face, as it is. Truly tune in, give your whole being to this moment in time.

What else does your experience of now need?

Nothing. It is full, rich, complete. Now requires nothing, there is nothing wrong … when you are fully here.

Your mind may still rebel.

It may try to negate your experience of now, saying “yes, but …”, as in “yes, but … yesterday I was so full of fear/anger/sadness,” or “yes, but … my daughter is very sick in hospital right now and I’m so anxious about her,” or “yes, but … tomorrow I have to have a really tough conversation with my boss and I’m worried about it.”

One of the mind’s greatest tricks is convincing you that the causes of fear and worry and suffering are present, they are very real now. However, your mind is anywhere but here. It is constantly trying to drag you off into some other place and time, and suffering only becomes real when you follow it.

Suffering – overload, overwhelm, reacting blindly – doesn’t happen when you’re fully present. Your mind will tell you that you’re irresponsible and uncaring if you let go of the events and the challenges of all other places and times to experience the one place your life is, the one place you can do anything about – here and now.

Don’t let your mind convince you.

How useful is it when you are worried or stressed about something you can do nothing about? How caring is it when you’re so consumed in a past or upcoming event you can’t be present with the people in front of you? How useful is suffering to you, or indeed anyone else?

It’s not.

A skilful, joyful, compassionate, meaningful and suffering-free life is being able to let go of all other places and moments so you can give yourself fully to what is happening right in front of you. Here is where life is!

Again, don’t get me wrong – in being present I’m not saying ignore your challenges and what you have to do, not at all.

I’m saying truly see what problems are actually here, now, right in front of you. See how  your mind wants to removes you from this moment to re-hash a situation that isn’t here. See all this mind stuff and ignore it, instead take a half-step back and be present; be fully alive.

Questions? Let me know!

Arjuna

PS. For the tools and techniques that make being present a doddle?

Here's 108 FREE ways to remember:

https://mailchi.mp/60dbe4ffeccf/freedom-from-thinking-so-much

Lost your mojo? Here’s how to get mojo invulnerablity

So often people say, “I’m stressed” or “I’m anxious” or “I can’t sleep because I’m thinking too much” … Do you ever get like that?

The reason you’ve lost your mojo… and it’s temporarily for sure, always temporary, you will come out the other side given time…

But the reason you’ve lost your mojo is that you’ve listened to your head tell you all about a problem and you’ve gotten stuck into all the “why’s?”, “what if’s?”, and “then what’s?” … 

You've given far too much attention to what you need to do and what could go wrong, and it's crushing you.

How to stop thinking incessantly, and get your mojo back when YOU want to, and not just rely on “time”?  The solution is to be present.

Always. The solution is to show up to now. Fully and completely. 

Now, being present is simple. It’s so simple, it’s hard to describe. Be here, in the same place as your body, tuned into your senses not your thoughts and emotions.

OK? Are you doing it, now? Excellent.

How to be morepresent?

Well, you can only be present now. You can have the intention to stay out of a distressing past or future, but you can only be present it NOW.

OK? That’s important. Because you will forget.

That’s not me being a downer and getting all negative on you, it’s a fact. Chances are very likely you will forget.

No deal. Honestly, no deal – this is a practice of remembering. When you remember, there you are! Awake and present. Alive again.

You will forget, you will remember again. Just make the most of the times you remember, ok?

Keep it that simple and you’re home and hosed. Practice as much as you can remember.You’ll develop that kind of bullet proof-ness to those thoughts. You’ll be able to keep them at bay, to drop them when you want to.

Getting great at being present means you can be free from the negativity and overwhelm of your own mind and be cool and calm all day long with a big phat smile on your face.

Alrighty?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Are you here, now?

PPS. Good stuff.

PPPS. Tools and techniques to make you present, for more of the day?

Here's a fine list for free, simple to read, easy to do, fun too - https://mailchi.mp/60dbe4ffeccf/freedom-from-thinking-so-much

What I learnt from being like Simon Cowell

Simon Cowell - he, the “nasty” judge of the X-Factor TV talent show - is doing the complete opposite of my idea of what an entertainment busy bigwig does: He’s given up his mobile phone for the last 10 months, and all to try and do something to benefit his mental health.

Cool huh? Also cool that he’s so public with the fact that he suffers from stress and negativity and overwhelm, just like everyone else.

I did the same thing and gave up my phone - for 10 days.

It was while I was away on retreat in Patmos. I locked my phone in the hotel safe, and only brought it out for 15 minutes a day.

So basically I cheated, a little. 

But I tell you, I learnt a lot. I could have better interactions with people, was more mindful and best of all - felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders, one that I didn't know was there.

It was spectacular to have huge chunks of my day where I just didn’t concern myself with anything to do with the world of the internet.

I found that large amounts of my “essential” must check this, “must find out that” flicking was a complete waste of time, and a weight on my shoulders.

The other thing - 

I think I'm already pretty good at not using my phone when there are other people in the room. I think conversation and connection is an art and if you don’t practice it, you end up unable to.

Jumping on the phone when there are other people around - people that I want to have a great relationship with - just means they get ignored and the relationship suffers. It does. And the crazy thing is you don’t really realise it.

Without my phone being around I saw that even more so, and I was given the ability to truly be with someone and to connect with them. That's really important to me.

But most importantly I found on my phone I wasn’t so mindful. It’s hard to be present. And that is the most crucial thing to me - staying alive to the presence of Now.

This is the one moment I’m alive and losing it to trivia is not how I want to live. Wasting time on click bait and rubbish and gossip is not how I want to fill my days.

Don’t get me wrong - entertaining trivia is wonderful in small doses. I love that. But I realised I was getting to a point where trivia was taking over.

“Just 5 minutes” was turning into half an hour … you know? Staying on my phone for too long and I started drifting, drifting into unconscious dream land.

So … for your consideration.

Mobile phones are amazing. It’s just I would say, from personal experience, be careful you don’t fall into being a slave to them. You don’t want that.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Meditation and mindfulness should be a very simple set of tools and techniques that align you with the Presence of Now - no matter where you are and what you are doing - making you come Alive to life and be able to drop negativity and overwhelm, any time you wish.

If you want to know how, I have a whole list of things that will help:

https://mailchi.mp/60dbe4ffeccf/freedom-from-thinking-so-much

Mayonnaise - Satan’s condiment?

"Mayonnaise is a tyrant of a condiment, and very arrogant. It thinks it makes everything better but it does not."_______

So said a man recently in the news who obviously dislikes mayonnaise ...

And I’m with him.

Mayo? No thanks. It’s a bit like whipped cream. That I do not like, no I do not. Not at all. It’s just too … cloying. All pervasive. It takes over. It is indeed a tyrant. Now clotted cream on the other hand … that there is nectar of Gods.

(In the picture - note the evil mayonnaise lurking in the background, plotting ... and to be childish, for sure, do you see the brand? Of course. I rest my case)

However - I'm not here to chat about condiments or scone toppings.

I want to talk about complaining ... because it works.

The above man estimates politely (key word) complaining about the mayonnaise being thrust upon his food in restaurants, even when he has clearly stated that he does not want such a thing, means he has been given around £1000 a year in free dishes or discounts as way of apology.

Yet so often we put up with something that is unacceptable. Have you had that? Of course you have. You clearly state “x” and you get “y”, and yet “I don’t want to make a fuss” you might say.

On holiday in Greece I heard a man saying the exact same thing while concerned bystanders were trying to help him with the (small) heart attack he was having.

"I don’t want to make a fuss, I’ll just die quietly here in the corner …"

Or someone treats you in a way that is appalling and you think it’s your fault, or that it doesn’t matter, it’s not important, you’ll just let it go … and yet clearly it does matter as it eats you alive inside your own head for the next 3 days.

Complaining, or having the courage to attempt to change the things you can, is a great thing, a wonderful thing, an important thing.

How will anyone get better if they don’t know what you feel about the matter? How will your life be if you never stand up for yourself and/or do those things that may well be within your power?

Indeed - it needs to be tempered with the serenity to accept that sometimes, perhaps often times, people won’t change. But at least you’ve spoken up for yourself in a timely manner.

Maybe you are given a free meal, maybe someone will shout at you.

What I know for sure is sometimes the truer the “complaint”, sometimes the more extreme the response from someone can be. When something hurts, sometimes that's a great indicator that it’s true. Ouch. You’re not as good as you think you are, but - as I said above - how will you improve if you don’t know?

Now this is all very different from whining and whinging.

That is a focus on what is wrong and is so boring and tedious. Be very careful with that. It means you’ve become a victim to what you think is wrong, and aren’t doing anything about it except for letting your trap run.

Do something or don’t, but just drop it. Whining is no way to live.

So have the courage to change, and the serenity to accept.

But how do you find the wisdom to know the difference?

Well - that’s where life gets exciting. That’s where the spiritual rubber meets the road of life, as a wise man once said.

Wisdom can only come when you tune into the need of this moment in time. Not the last moment, but this moment, here now.

When you do that you are given wisdom. And it’s all about playing and exploring and seeing too. Don’t be afraid to make a “wrong” decision. You’ll be paralysed that way, too scared to do anything, and that’s no fun.

Just tune in and see what this moment needs. Alrighty?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. It always comes back to now, doesn’t it?

All of life, all of it - here, now. Get good at living here and now, and all stress, overwhelm, negativity and whining fall away. 

Peace, clarity, effectiveness, contentment and fun reign.

Here's 108 ways to get super present and mindful and stay cool, calm and collected:

https://mailchi.mp/60dbe4ffeccf/freedom-from-thinking-so-much

Drained and stressed OR Alive and blessed?

Want to be a smiley yellow ball? Of course you do! Read on ... To live a life where you’re excited rather than stressed and drained, content and grateful rather than dissatisfied, fully present and focused rather than spending all your time regretting the past and worried for the future, being a wonderful role model, anchor and inspiration for your loved ones, as opposed to letting that snappy, grumpy beast out …

When you stop and put your mind to it, when you nurture that, this life can come quite simply. It does.

The Good is always here, and many times it just takes a reminder to open your eyes to see it. When you see it, you live it - every part of your life responds.

How do YOU remind yourself to live the Good, nay Great, life?

What do YOU do to stop and connect with and nurture that really best version of you?

I know it’s easier, sometimes, to just go through the motions of life. I know it can sometimes be easier to grump and whine and all the rest of it. I know it can sometimes be easier to get into a habit of rushing around trying to get all your jobs done and responsibilities out of the way and “then I’ll get to take time to connect and nurture the inner …”

But I know this for sure:

Look after the inner first and the outer follows sweetly and smoothly.The inner connection makes everything Great, and Greater. It means you can sail through the tough times.

If you like quotes, because I certainly do, Meister Eckhart, that groovy German monk from way back, once said the very same thing: ________

“What we plant in the soil of contemplation, we shall reap in the harvest of action.” ________

So see it as a practice. See it like brushing the teeth of your soul, nutrition for your Being. Something you do everything single day.

Put yourself in the way of inspiration and reminders and the Good, and reap the benefits.

(That’s your homework for today by the way.)

Go well! Arjuna

PS. It’s the very reason I close my eyes and meditate every day. It’s the very reason I hang out with fun, inspired, inner anchored people as much as possible. It’s the very reason I teach and share all this stuff:

Inspiration and reminding and deepening of the Good in every moment and in every part of my life.

Here's a free guide on exactly how to do that:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Want to wake up the easy way or the hard way?

Lance Armstrong, that incredibly driven cyclist character, once said something about perspective and attitude. Now he’s is probably second best known for his recovery from cancer, but about that he said: _______ “I take nothing for granted. There are only good days and great days after chemotherapy.” _______

When you live through something has nasty as cancer and chemotherapy everything becomes a bonus.

And yet here we are with a pretty good life, and it can be so easy to fall into complaining, into taking things for granted, into focusing on what is wrong with our lives.

Isn’t it?

When you face challenges of any kind, they can serve you (as in being of service to your highest good) to highlight what is good and great about your life. Things formerly unnoticed start to come into focus. All of a sudden it can become clear how wonderful your life actually is, now, as it is.

And yet you can get through the average day without even appreciating how good it is just to be alive, to taste the coffee and breathe the air and walk across the Earth.

If I exist for one thing, it’s to remind people (and as I remind you, I remind myself) of how great things already are. The importance of, instead of waiting for a better moment, loving this one ...

Not so you don’t do anything, but so you can be of the greatest use to the world, free from stress or struggle or negativity.

Because you don’t want a wake up call like cancer. You don’t need it to wake up. Choose to wake up the easy way.

It just takes a little reminding now and then, it takes prioritising what is truly important to you, and practicing now, when the going is good.

The more you practice, the more you remember. The more you remember, the more you become what you practice. Doing this means overwhelm and negativity and feeling lost becomes a memory. A memory. You free yourself from all of that.

Alrighty?

Thank you for you, and go well! Arjuna

PS. Join me for some tools that centre you right in the heart of not taking anything for granted? That make all your days only good or great? Here's your free guide to get you started:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Surviving your own family

So how was your Easter? Thought I’d say hi — I don’t have any message for you, nothing about rebirth, new starts, choosing to hit the reset button and begin again any time you like. Nothing like that. You can take something from that list if you like though, for sure!

I had a couple of days with extended family, just enjoying life. Nice to switch off and do nothing but read a book and chat and go for a walk (and a kayak - although cold, that’s always a joy!) and cook and hang out.

You know, I believe the ability to tune into this precise moment in time and to make the very most of what is in front of you — no matter what that may be — could be one of the most important skills you can ever develop.

To stop dwelling on a past that is gone and a future that is beyond your control, and to thrive now, independent of the circumstances you find yourself in — rather than surviving until your life looks the way you want it to is rare, very rare.

Where this becomes relevant to Easter, is family time. For some, family time together just means you get a bit edgy, tempers start to fray, arguments start or resurface - at the very least.

Amazing how family, like no one else, can poke and prod you and create such a reaction and emotion, isn’t it? So many people ask me about this.

You can’t choose your family, for sure, and so if you need to take time out from them for your own sanity, well I for one think that is a great idea.

What you CAN do, however, is simply love them exactly as they are. A lot of us try and change our partners and our family to a huge degree, and that is always a recipe for disaster — in my opinion.

Accepting and allowing goes a long way with family (with anyone actually) — and means YOU have a peaceful life. Instead of fighting and insisting they are a particular way, you stop struggling and can make the most of who they are.

Perhaps that means you don’t spend a lot of time with them. But for sure, loving them exactly as they are means you spend a ton less energy and time getting upset with them - and that is always the bottom line: you’re setting up your life so that you always enjoy this moment, and the people in it, to the maximum.

How can I enjoy this moment more?

If you find yourself a bit miserable, then so often the answer is to get out of the past and the future and make the most of what you do have, instead of insisting of what you should have.

It's a practice - you have to practice this. You can't just turn it on any more than I can just balance on my nose without practicing. OK?

And there is more to it than that, but for a cheeky blog that will suffice.

For a short “hello”, turns out I had something to say after all. How about that? Wonders never cease, do they?

You’re awesome, thank you for reading, and if there’s anything I can do for you, let me know. Go well! Arjuna

PS. Of course, having the tools to be present, the tools that bring you to a state of enjoyment is super, super useful. Here's my free guide to how to be more present, less stressed and to freely choose to enjoy this moment, no matter what:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Are you the only one?

Do you ever wake in the middle of the night, unable to sleep, your thoughts going a million miles an hour? You’re unable to shut them up and get back to sleep so you give up, get up and raid the fridge? (yom yom yom -but then that weight goes on which gives you something else to chastise yourself about?) Are worry and doubt and anxiety just a normal part of your day? Do you worry, going over something you’ve said because the way someone MIGHT have taken it? Do you ever just panic, anxiety causing a knot in your stomach and your whole system a buzzing just from some irrational — or perhaps completely rational but debilitating — fear?

Have you ever struggled to do something, anything, because your own head — what a traitor! — has turned against you and is busy shouting what a loser you are? Or you’ve made the smallest of mistakes and your head (traitor!!) keeps going on about it, not letting you move on?

You too? Oh my goodness! I thought I was the only one.

All of the above and more used to be a regular occurrence for me. I knew how good life could be, but I knew how shocking my fear and worry and self-doubt could be too. It was plenty of motivation to do something about my own head's negativity and overwhelm.

If I can get beyond these habits — and they are habits, learned ways of responding to the world — you can also learn to leave them behind. Honestly, you can.

I know what it’s like to look around and think that you are the only one struggling. That everyone else seems to have it all sorted, all easy, perfected. I thought I was the only one sharing a life with a traitor in my own skull.

If I can move beyond it, so can you. Promise.

What it takes it becoming more aware of what the voice in your head is telling you. In this awareness you can come to make a different choice. You can distract yourself from all of the trouble, and focus on what you want to focus on: like the good things of life, the things you DO have, or your actual options right now rather than irrational and/or constant “what if?” fears.

It takes practicing relaxing and training your attention on a regular basis. That is all. If you’ve had enough of negativity and overwhelm, you’ll have plenty of motivation for practicing this awareness and attention shifting on a daily basis. And that will bring you to a different state of being, a different way of living very quickly.

It will. If I can do it, so can you.

But it helps, it does, to know you’re not the only one. And that there’s a way out. And that you are enough, you are wonderful, you are doing a fine job all things considering — no matter what your own head says.

That’s me. Thank you for taking the time to read this. It all begins with a shift within you, a shift you can carry out. Not only does all of your life benefit, but so does everyone around you too. By changing yourself, you help change the world.

True that.

Go well! Arjuna

PS.

People often say, "awareness is all well and good, but what can I DO????" They want something concrete -- things to do, to practice. Here’s what I have for you: www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

PPS.

Questions? Let me know - I'd love to help!

Facebook is evil! (perhaps)

People are currently talking about Facebook and how addictive it is. They're talking about how impressionable (young and old) minds are being swayed this way and that. They're talking about how perhaps Facebook should be forced to do this and that, and perhaps generally not be so interesting. Maybe. I'm trivialising and being dramatic. All at the same time! Ha!

(And look! That guy is lifting not one, but TWO Facebooks!)

Here’s my take on the monolith that is Facebook - and in fact, all the "evils" of life. There perhaps is a place, on a case by case basis, for management of access to certain things that may be addictive. Especially in the young. Alcohol, drugs, sugar, guacamole … you know, all the fun things.

Or maybe we should just equip each and every person with a mentor. Someone wise and experienced who will explain and guide and yet allow people to make mistakes and work out that some things just take you in the wrong direction when overdone. That would be super cool.

However, before we get to that, I’m going to talk to you, as you are, right now - yes, YOU and what you can do for yourself.

In order to make your journey through life more comfortable, you can try and carpet the whole world … or you can put something under your own feet.

Ironing out ALL the wrinkles and challenges and sticky sharp things in the world is tricky, probably impossible. Putting something under your own feet? Super simple, right?

You can delete Facebook, throw your phone away, pack your job in, shift to a tropical island to avoid traffic and other people … OR you can learn to change how you react to these things. Wouldn’t that be simpler?

In a world where you will be externally out of control at least some of the time, if not many times … why not learn to control what you can?

Actually ... What can you control? What can you learn to control?

The stuff of life, the circumstances, the events, the people? Not always, not often, sometimes never. But you CAN control your choices, you can control your habitual reactions. At least you can learn to control them.

And that is where a regular practice of something like the Bright Path Ishayas Ascension comes in.

You get to see where your choice lays - how ultimately all of life begins from your attitude, your response and reaction to circumstances, your blaming or taking responsibility for your own actions.

Start there.

Unchain yourself from your reactions, your addictions, from your limitations, from the things within you that are holding you back and then see what life becomes, what Facebook becomes, what stress becomes.

Pad your own feet first and then see what might be done with the wrinkles of the world.

Start within, then move without (though don’t wait for perfection, you’ll course adjust as you go).

Awesome, you're awesome, I’m done - and have a great day!

Go well, Arjuna

And here’s how you learn to have freedom of choice. It's a free guide so you can get started right now. But ask me if you have any questions too:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Why you should be kind to yourself first

(<--- Here's a picture of how being kind to yourself which allows you to be awesome might look) Last blog I talked about President Obama and how he constantly taught his daughters to “be kind, be helpful”.

But how can you be kind and be helpful to others unless you also are kind and helpful to yourself?

I feel like I talk about this a lot, but it’s such a big thing.

It really IS a big thing - honestly - the voice in your head is so unforgiving about you and your mistakes. You will drive yourself into the ground trying to prove all manner of things to that voice and what you believe the people around you want you to be.

Being kind and being helpful to everyone begins within you.

Understanding that the voice of harshness and criticism doesn’t need to be listened to is a great start. Being aware of it but not following it (the half-step back) is super kind and helpful - to you.

Then it can run out of steam, run out of momentum - no longer are you swimming in negativity and you can also shift to appreciation. You can celebrate what you have done, what you have achieved, how great you actually are. You can understand that you’re doing your best and tomorrow you’ll do better.

When you do master that voice, you are truly able to be kind to anyone and everyone. Without mastering that voice? You cannot be truly kind, not fully.

Any worth while project in life always has its foundation within.

Mastering the inner game means you master the outer game. Take the time to come to grips with all your learned and limited beliefs and habits and you’ll be able to live as the very best version of you.

Alrighty? You’re awesome.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Mastering the inner game … being able to be kind even to that voice of harshness and doubt and criticism and negativity? Here's a free guide to doing just that:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Patience and other boring things

Apparently the average human has the attention span that is less than a goldfish. What a joke that is.

No focus, no patience, no immersion in this moment. No flow, no satisfaction ... nothing and nowhere.

Bored already? Well leave this here, cos this isn’t for you. But it could be the greatest thing you learn to do. If you're bored, you're wasting your life.

For sure, patience sounds boring. Like something your gran would tell you to do.

But when you want something to happen and you’ve done all that you can, patience is your greatest friend. If you want to do something but have no idea what, patience is your best buddy. If you have a problem and need an answer, looked everywhere and can't find one, then patience is your BFF …

However - If you’re waiting at all, then stop … why wait? Why delay your life AT ALL until a future moment comes along that you hope is better, bolder, more beautiful?

Patience. It’s not even the opposite of waiting. When you get good at it, you no longer need patience. Weird huh? Patience is only necessary when you’re begging for the future to arrive, now.

Same deal with boredom - it always exists when your mind’s attention is in the future.

Master future surfing, master your mind, master waiting, impatience and boredom. And a host of other things ...

Honestly - life is far too short to waste on waiting and being bored. When you get aware and mindful your life really starts to come alive. Not WHEN your life changes in someway, but simply because you fully show up to now to you life, exactly as it is.

Discover what it means to truly be alive. How wonderful would that be?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Try these free guides out - we talk so much about the way you’re living life and how a few adjustments mean you can make it a completely different affair. Impatience, boredom, stress, negativity, wasting life … all flipped on their heads, for you:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Doorway prayers and pauses

Ages ago I read of a group of Zen monks who would go through a very complicated set of chants and prayers every time they went through a doorway. “How bizarre”, I thought to myself, “Imagine if I did that every time I entered a room - it would take forever to get any where” … and it would.

But the purpose of doing that is not praying to the doorway, it's for the monk to make sure they don’t forget and mentally run off. Doorways are always opportunities, you see - to leap into the future of where you are heading, or stay present and aware to the moment you find yourself in: In your head - lost in thinking, or in your body - aware and living.

There’s always a choice, and remembering to make your choice is everything. Mental activity is the heavy stuff. No matter the event, the thinking about it is infinitely more stressful.  And - while being constantly ahead of yourself means you feel busy and overwhelmed, being present means you do one thing at a time and you feel calm, regardless of how much you have to do. One of these choices causes drama and exhaustion, the other means you can wend your way through life smoothly and efficiently, with a smile on your face.

I mention this story because why not? And a fine fellow was telling me that he has just started to do what his father did, every day before he set off for work. His father would make sure everything was ready, and then stand at the front door, staring out the small window - sometimes for ten minutes or so.

Why?

He was making sure he was ready for the day. Taking the time before he stepped out on the street to pause, to collect, to get that half-step back before he got caught up in the busy, in the go go.

My dad would do the opposite - as in at the end of the day. As a kid I would hear the car pull up and wait at the window for my dad to come in. He would sometimes sit in that car for ages. Later on I asked him what he was doing and he said he was listening to the sound of silence … letting the day go so he could join his family anew, without the events of the day and all the wouldda shouldda couldda’s clinging to him.

So you know I’m a big fan of closing your eyes and meditating because that brings you the choice for a large amount of calm extremely quickly, but if you don’t want to do that you now have something else.

I call it "the Pause", and whether done before the day, during and/or after, it is always worth investing in. You can be reassured that meditating AND the pause combined together are huge.

And why not? No one is going to make the choice for the half-step back for you - are they? Maybe you should get going on that for yourself.

Questions? Let me know, as always I’d love to help.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. I put together a very easy to read, yet I believe rather compelling, list of ways of practicing more mindful and enjoy being less stressed and struggling. It's free, and you can get a copy here:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb

A very nice tale about fish

After Christmas - and its a lovely time to relax and perhaps take a little introspection. A little examination of how you doing at all of this. After all, New Years is coming and bringing with it all of the resoluteness of being inspired to do things different. So - Why do you do all the hard work you do?

There’s that classic story of the business guru chatting to the fisherman. You might have heard it?

The fisherman wakes early, catches a few fish for his family and friends and then heads back to eat and enjoy time with his family and friends and explore his world.

The business guru suggests that he can help the fisherman be more successful. If the fisherman works really hard for a period of time, expanding his operations and employing more people, he could be rich, really rich.

“What would be the point of being rich?” the fisherman asks of him.

“So you could retire, wake up early, catch a few fish, return home and enjoy your life at your leisure”, replies the business guru.

The fisherman is puzzled, “Isn’t that what I’m already doing?”

Sometimes we do stuff the long way around. I see it all the time, people struggle and push and try and strain … and all for what?

So in some future moment, you can relax and be happy? Why not relax and be happy NOW?

Have a little look at what it means to be successful - to you. Not to anyone else, but to you. What is success? What are real riches, in your eyes?

If it’s exactly what you’re doing right now, carry on. If not? Why not make some changes? Life is too short for anything else, right?

Let me know if I can help, with any of this.

Go well, Arjuna

PS. One thing I know for sure that will help you live the life you want to live, is this: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

The horror of first world problems

Imagine my horror this morning as I awoke and found the coffee machine not working! What is one to do? And what will Sumati say when she get no coffee handed to her in bed? Big trouble, I can tell you!

I know, I know, serious first world problem, so don't fly off the handle. And it’s ok, I managed to make the coffee and awake the Sumati the easy way. But it was a close call, I can tell you.

The trouble with life is the unexpected. When things don’t go according to your plan. Sheesh! And sometimes that is just no problem, right? “Oh shucks” you’ll say, quickly followed by “oh well” as you fully accept your plan will look a little different than you thought it would.

Other days? The smallest thing, the smallest first world problem can be just the latest in a long list of grievous attacks on your person. You don’t say “shucks” you say other, more “grown up" words. Maybe you kick and scream. Or at least you want to.

I think one the greatest things you can do to enjoy more calm and ease - even in the middle of hard work - is to monitor your internal state.

When things are winding you up, noticing this and realising it would be useful to back away, even for a minute or two, just to get stuff in perspective. It is just a coffee machine but it has potential - if you let it - to destroy everything you hold dear. I’m being dramatic - but perhaps it does have that potential. Anything does - to ruin your good mood and make you irritable and chuntering and full of anxiety about what your Sumati might say when there is no coffee.

And it all seems to work out, doesn’t it? But staying calm means you can at least chuckle about it all, rather than lose it completely.

So - monitor, stay calm, enjoy being awesome. Thats me!

Go well - Arjuna

PS.

Perspective, clarity, calm - all wonderful things. Here’s how to get more and make sure you look after your own mood

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

The 2 things that cause more trouble than anything else

Money and relationships are the two things that will cause most people the most grief. Worries and anxieties about money. Worries and anger and resentment at other people. Grrrr … And this time of year they collide in spectacular ways - what with Christmas and various celebrations going on, don’t they?

I kind of understand why some spiritual traditions totally give up money and relationships - perhaps because they’re seen as too hard work.

But they are so valuable, extremely valuable, and not to be avoided at all. They will show you so much about yourself and as such can be an excellent source of evolution …

If you are willing - and that is the key part - if you are willing they will show you …

Your fears, your prejudices, your past experiences, when you hold tightly to something or someone, your jealousies and comparisons …

Where you’re not being present to this moment, where you’re blaming someone else for your reactions … and so much. Where you fly off the handle in outrageous ways …

Where you can claim back more choice for you - freedom of personal choice - and not let your mood be dictated by anyone or anything.

So look carefully at these things. What can you learn from them? Perhaps it’s simply to be more present, worry less about the things you have no control over? Perhaps it’s to ask for what you want from someone else, and not hold back so you get angry and resentful? Perhaps its to make sure you look after yourself, take even a few moments just for you, to regroup, to get present, to get calm?

Welcome these things, don’t hide from them. This is the university of life - it will help you master your mind so you can end all stress and suffering, and have the most amazing of lives.

Isn’t that wonderful? I think so. Questions? Lemme have them!

Go well, Arjuna

PS. If you want to make your next 7 days spectacular, amid the chaos and busy-ness of the season? Try this little mindfulness challenge:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

Feel like you’re out of control? Join the club

So I’m writing a book. You may have heard me say that before, perhaps years ago - and yes, it’s the same book. However, it’s finally on the final leg to completion. The editors will have it before Christmas, which is exciting.

However - the curious thing about writing a book is finding that it’s all been said before, by other people, and better.

Really what I’m doing is collating the right stuff from the right people - really I’m not writing, but doing a compendium of genius that I approve of. Perhaps you might approve of it too, or a least cause you to think differently, and approve of different things. I’ll let you know when it’s ready.

But I came across a quote yesterday, and a beauty is is: ________

“Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control, and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can't control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible”. Epictetus ________

What ARE you in control of? Can you even control your own mind? The answer is (and here’s a big tip for you meditators) - no, no you can’t. You can learn to ignore it, be indifferent to it, but you cannot stop it.

You can shape your thoughts in many ways. You can strengthen certain brain pathways meaning you’re more likely to respond to life with appreciation, gratitude, love and compassion rather than judgement, anxiety, anger, negativity.

This is nice, indeed.

The real key to life begins in becoming aware of what is beyond your thoughts. Becoming aware of the ocean that your fishy thoughts swim in. And that the ocean and your awareness, your consciousness is the same thing.

You can focus on the fish, or you can focus on the ocean.

Now that really is a thing.

So I’m done - see what you can control, stop fighting what you can’t. Be at peace, be effective, be joyful.

Easy life.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Interested in nicer thoughts and/or this ocean of presence?

Here’s a thing for you:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

I love great questions, don’t you?

Got a great question on the back of a recent email - The email was all about the importance of being fluid, of finding out what works for you - of not shying away from hard work, but avoiding harshness and rigidity like the plague. In other words, making sure you do what you do because the bottom line is more and more joy. ________

"A follow up question. Is there scope for rigour in our practice? I don't mean strictness or punishment. I'm just thinking about disciplines which do require followers to push themselves in order to achieve enlightenment." ________

This is such a great question. Here’s what I said:

Absolutely, there is space for zeal and commitment and integrity ... but it needs to be in the most useful direction. So often zeal is misdirected into activities that have no use in helping you become filled with presence, dissolving into that lovely state of clarity, stillness and peace.

AND ... quite often zeal and commitment becomes forcefulness and self-violence. It can be easy for many people to fall into suppression and rigidity and harshness and even out and out brutality. The fact is ANY SORT of controlling, trying, straining just slows your growth down.

Read that last line again ^^^

This path we’re talking about - one to greater and greater calm, contentment, fulfillment, joy, freedom … it requires no harshness or self-violence or even seriousness of any sort. You cannot have a more heavenly life travelling via hell.

Stubbornness? Yup - A very useful trait  - but it needs balancing with patience and gentleness and fluidity.

OK?

So take a load off. You keep stepping in the direction you want to go, keep practicing those right things, and you will master your mind, and enjoy all the benefits there of. With a bigger and bigger smile on your face.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. You will find your point of balance with all of this. Tune in, get present, and see what the best course of action for YOU is. You’ll have to give up the shoulds, and what everyone else is doing - but no one really wants them anyway, AND you shall find what works for you.

PPS. Tuning in, getting present, seeing what works for you? Head this way to get good at that:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

How to avoid knocking someone unconscious in a Peppa Pig rage

Did you see recently - in the scrum to see a giant Peppa Pig down London way, one mum was knocked unconscious by another? I know Peppa Pig is serious business, but getting SO uptight you’ll punch someone to gain preferential access to a 8 foot tall pink pig is taking things a little too far, in my humble opinion.

I also know that rage, blind fury, snapping and flying off the handle, even reacting and roasting your loved ones with some anger or sarcasm is ALWAYS a recipe for regret ... and jail time if you’re the punching type.

How do you NOT though?

How can you stop losing your cool? - at work, at home, on the road, on the sports field, where ever … ? Even just a little bit, how do you stop the frazzle? Because it's possible.

Typically during your day it’s never one big event that causes you to lose it, is it? It’s the dozens and dozens of little frustrations and imperfections and failures and let downs and thwartations (new word I made up) - those dozens of little cuts that when they all build up - that's when you see red when someone cuts in front of you in the line to a giant pig.

The thing is, you have to practice dealing with life’s downs in a different way. You have to notice them building and do something to release the pressure. Instead of letting them get to you, meaning they build up and up until you explode, developing the “Meh” factor is all important - the shrugging of your shoulders even when you sorely wish something went differently.

Saying your peace if necessary, of course, but in a calm, measured way, not with a fist - or it’s verbal equivalent.

This takes practice! I need to say this again - this takes practice. Getting to a point where you’re aware of how frazzled you're actually getting so you can choose to bring it back down ... this all takes practice.

So what can you practice, if you don't want to explode? 2 things:

Meditation - simple, easy, and practiced right is the thing for gaining a bullet proof Meh factor. I would say learn to Ascend. Absolutely. I’m not teaching anything until next year, but you may find a course you can travel to here:

https://www.thebrightpath.com/courses?t=75 Want something right now?

I understand - I have a natty little handout on meditation so you can get started asap, if you so desire. You can gain it by downloading it here:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb

AND/OR …

Become more mindful and present and calm with your eyes open. More awareness means you notice the frazzle sooner and can back off BEFORE it is too late.

And I have just the thing for you right here, a challenge to super increase your levels of this, and all within 7 days:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ Questions? Let me have them!

Go well, Arjuna

PS. I mean it when I say if you have any questions hit me up. True!