Holes in my prized underpants

I have holes! So many holes, holes everywhere.

I have a bad case of moths, and they are eating my prized underwear.

It’s not funny, I tell you, at all.

If you’re an outdoor type at all you’ll appreciate how good silky smooth, warm as toast, merino wool is against the skin. How much better it is than smelly old synthetics.

And how expensive that stuff is.

So you’ll also appreciate when the moths move in and munch my fine undergarments, how mad it makes me.

How much heart break it causes.

How much ranting away to my fiancee, cursing little flying creatures I might have been guilty of doing.

But here’s the interesting thing:

I have done nothing about it.

In my wardrobe I have a fine, measured to fit, woollen suit.

I’ve left it in there. But if I found holes in that, that would really make me mad.

It would probably make me so mad I would actually do something about them moths.

A bit late, though … right?

But that is exactly what humanity does.

Most of us won't do anything until the pain of doing it is less than the pain of not doing it.

We don’t do anything different until a problem has created sufficient pain.

There is such inertia to the comfortable path, and that comfortable path is rarely the path that brings us what we say we want.

I see it with my underwear. I am obviously happier whining and complaining about moths than actually doing something about them.

So how often do you do that in your life?

How often do you say this is important to me, but do nothing about it?

In your business, in your relationships, in your health?

Getting what you want requires overcoming inertia. It requires often times doing something a little different.

And some people never gain the necessary momentum to actually live the life they want, ever.

Is that how you want to live your life?

Don’t be happy with compromise, with being so comfortable you never do the things you say you want to do.

If you know you can be better in the head, in terms of being mentally fitter or more flexible, you may well be interested in coming to the Ascension meditation course I have planned.

All the details are here: https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/ascensionmeditation/

It is the one thing that you will do every day that makes everything else simpler.

You can, and should, book on here:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/ascensionmeditation/

You won’t regret it.

If you’re wanting to repeat the course, send me an email for a seat. It’ll be great to have you back.

Let me know if I can do anything for you, otherwise have a fine old day.

- Arjuna

Coffee is the devil’s drink

Sitting in my office this morning, back to a warm radiator with a great cup of coffee in hand. The fiancee has nabbed a bargain on eBay buying one of these fancy pants coffee machines that do it all for you, grind the beans, heat the cup, I think it will even drink it for you if you’re in a hurry.

Love it. Coffee fuels industry.

There was a time when I thought coffee was the devil’s drink. Not quite the devil, but you know what I mean - I thought it wasn’t a good thing.

I thought it was bad because everything I had read regarding meditation and yoga and all things spiritual and all the people on the internet who were the same said “herbal tea”.

Herbal tea this, goji berries that, gluten free everything.

And herbal tea is alright, actually. But I won’t go near those berries.

The point is: I wonder how many people don’t meditate because of the herbal tea idea?

The idea that they have to change something about themselves in order to be involved or to get it.

The truth is that the giving up of anything isn’t necessary, at all.

Sure, you make changes and arrangements to practice, but whatever you do needs to work for you.

Meditation should be a simple practice to reveal the best version of yourself to yourself.

To allow you to be mentally “fitter”, more resilient, more fluid, more able to focus and let go when required.

How much simpler can I make it?

Great efficiency and effectiveness comes from that. Great peace and happiness too.

You may make changes in your life - but only because you want to, not cos you “have” to.

Make sense?

In fact, the only thing you need to be willing to give up is limitation itself.

ie: The ideas and concepts and beliefs that you hold in your head that stop you from fully enjoying each and every moment.

OK? So don’t hold onto an idea that meditation needs to involve anything else.

You don’t need to drink herbal tea if you don’t want to.

You don’t need to chant or burn incense or sit on the floor.

I personally make myself a little nest on the couch with my blankie.

It’s got to be something that’s enjoyable, something that you look forward to doing.

For me sitting on the floor meant meditation was something I was glad was over … but you may be different.

So enjoy - enjoy each and every moment.

Of course my meditation weekend will be extremely enjoyable.

We’ll cut through the nonsense and get to the heart of the matter for you, giving you the exact tools and understanding you need to rise above all limitation and stress.

15-17 April, £200, all support after the course is included.

Email me for a seat.

Talk mo later - Arjuna

ps. another cup of coffee? I know a great little place...

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FREE ebook and email coaching on meditation and mindset for ending stress and self-sabotage, and living an exceptional life:

www.arjunaishaya.com/discovermeditationandmindset

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Have you ever walked away from something that scared you?

When I was a younger fellow, my sister and I went bungy jumping - off a huge bridge, into a gorge below.

That was the plan anyway.

She went first. They hooked her up, she jumped, no hesitation.

Me? I was terrified before I had even climbed down onto the little platform.

I’ve always been afraid of heights - well, jumping off heights. But I had learnt that if I could push my fears by doing stuff like kayaking and rock climbing then:

a) the rush was amazing, and …

b) the sense of certainty and inner peace that came after was extraordinary (I hadn’t discovered Ascension meditation back then)

So I decided that I could actually jump off a bridge, and I would like to.

I got on the little platform, they hooked me up, and with legs a trembling I found that I couldn’t even stand straight. I was leaning way back you see, in an attempt to get away from the drop.

I knew I wanted to do it, I just needed a moment, or two.

The guys operating the jump started mouthing off: “Strap it on”, “Come on you big girl”.

And at that all the magic was gone.

I got them to undo me and I walked away. And didn’t regret it at all.

In that moment I saw the difference between doing something because other people think you should - and are yelling at you to - and doing something because you want to.

Doing something in your way, in your own time and on your own terms, because you know that’s the way you’re going to do it.

I saw the perverse side of me that would rather walk away than do something because “I should”.

I also saw that you can be so filled with fear, but also a knowing that you’re gonna do it anyway despite the emotion, despite the thoughts.

There is such a sweetness in that. Everything focusses, everything becomes super present.

And then some oik shouts in your ear and it all crashes.

Ah, it’s a fun game this life.

The lesson in my non-jump experience? I’m sure there are many but my coffee hasn’t kicked in yet.

But I know experiences like this led directly to me wanting to be the boss of my own mind. To find calm in the face of everything. To know my own mind and do things because I want to, not cos I should.

And so, should you feel the same, I would welcome you on my Ascension meditation course. 15-17 April, £200.

Email me for a very comfy chair.

I’ll leave you with that. Have a superb day!

- Arjuna

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FREE ebook and email coaching on meditation and mindset for ending stress and self-sabotage, and living an exceptional life:

http://www.arjunaishaya.com/discovermeditationandmindset

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I'm so sore

I’m so sore, and it’s all my fault. I can hardly type - seriously.

You see, it’s been 10 years since I have been kayaking on a river, and I spent the whole weekend thrashing myself, in a boat, out on the water.

And what fun it was.

Totally worth the pain and suffering right now.

Funny isn’t it? I’m pretty fit, I run and I lift weights and I do yoga, and yet I found new ways to hurt.

Lessons for you in this all?

Plenty.

As great as my life has been up to now, coming back to something that was the core of my life for so long - I was a kayaking addict - has added a welcome extra little sparkle.

I feel so good this morning.

You need to do the things that you love. You can learn to be content with anything and everything, but you need to get out and do those things that make you shine.

It is far too easy to not do them, to get into a rut of thinking other stuff is more important. It’s not.

When you do that what happens is that a bit average becomes the new normal. And that is not the basis of a great life.

The other lesson was in attitude.

You see the guys I was paddling with were testing me out.

So they threw me in the biggest, safest (read boring-est) kayak they could find. We had lectures on what would happen if someone (ie. me) came out of their kayak. And so on and so on.

And fair enough too, it has been 10 years. But I must confess I was a bit "yeah yeah whatever".

We turned up at the river and the water is barely moving. Hardly challenging at all. It wasn't looking like a good start to a fun day. Boring!

Before, the old me, pre-Ascension meditation would have had a grump, and been bored, and sulked.

And yet I had the best time. It was so fun.

I could have chosen to be bored but I didn’t. I made the most of what I had, ginormous safe boat and all.

Sounding like my dad now, but I made my own fun with what I had.

It was truly a good time. I surprised myself.

I learnt once again that I can be content and enjoy what I’m doing, even when my ego thinks things should be different.

It’s never about the situation, always about your relationship with it.

And they saw me having fun, and invited me back on Sunday for something harder, something more challenging.

Nice one!

No one wants to hang out with Mister Grumpy. Everyone wants to help out Mister Having Fun.

And so my fiancee was left waiting for a pick up at the train station while I was late off the river (“just one more go on that wave”) but it was all worth it.

To sum up?

Your choice matters. Your attitude changes everything.

What you do is important, and how you do what you do is even more so.

Do you have freedom of choice? Or do you get stuck in loops of certain emotion or certain thoughts or certain reactions?

If you want a way out, I have the means: 15-17 April. Give me £200 and I will give you everything you need to have complete and absolute freedom of choice: freedom from your own mind and negative patterns for the rest of your life.

Simple, easy, powerful.

Send me an email and you are in.

Hopefully I’m not still sore by then.

Take it easy! I know I will be.

- Arjuna

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FREE ebook on meditation and mindset for ending stress, struggle and self-sabotage, and living an exceptional life:

http://www.arjunaishaya.com/discovermeditationandmindset

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A little little thing that can make this Valentines the greatest ever

So - assuming you are in a relationship with a “significant” other, this Valentines will mean you are set for a day of goodness with your “fluffy bunny” or “snookums” or whatever pet name you have for them.

If you are flying solo, so to speak, do not despair - it doesn’t matter. This will still apply to you.

This is because we are constantly in relationship with someone, romantic or not. Some relationships are more important than others, but interactions are a constant part of being human. Unless you are sitting in a cave right now, with nothing but the birds and the bats for company, that is.

The secret to an amazing relationship - once again, any kind of relationship - is to realise that average Joe relationships are all about “what can I get from this?”.

Given that average Joe is about “me, me, me”, and you, since you have the good taste to be reading this, are as far from average as can be, you should do the direct opposite.

Make every relationship, and especially the ones you want to thrive, about what you can give.

Ensure your approach to your loved one is “how can I give?” and you will be happy forever.

Tip number two is that the best gift is of yourself.

Shiny, expensive things are all well and good, but your full and complete attention, your ongoing appreciation and gratitude, your compliments, your assistance, your understanding and patience, your awareness and presence … in other words, you, is so much more than shiny-ness.

All you have to do is be aware - give, a lot, and constantly. And be aware when you are taking.

And you can’t do it later. Nothing is more important than the important people in your life. Don’t take them for granted!

Job done.

You can thank me later.

Have a great day, love them to pieces.

- Arjuna

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FREE ebook on meditation and mindset for ending stress, struggle and self-sabotage:

http://www.arjunaishaya.com/discovermeditationandmindset

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Lessons in living well from the airport

My time in Norway is at an end. I sit here in departures in the airport, sipping on coffee, watching people sit and walk and do their thing.

Humanity is just the same, everywhere I go.

Every class I teach, every talk I give, I try and ask people what the most important thing to them might be.

Everyone, everyone, says some version of happiness. Not a billion kroner, but peace and love and joy and contentment and peace and an end to struggle and suffering.

A man just walked past with his baby. The baby looked surprised, the man, happy and in love.

Maybe it’s that simple? Make a baby and carry it around?

I believe it’s even simpler. You just have to make sure your happiness is more important than getting stressed, or reacting, or thinking too much.

If it’s important, if you prioritise your peace, then happiness comes quickly.

It comes quickly because you find that happiness has its basis not in achieving anything, but in being content with what is.

Without being able to choose to be content, not even a baby’s soft cheek can help you.

If you understand this one thing then you know that you need nothing to make you happy, you just need to be attentive to this moment, letting go of any wishes or concerns that it was different somehow.

Imagine what it would be like if you had a foundation of happiness, constantly content?

It gives achieving your goals such a solid foundation because you no longer need to achieve, but you want to achieve, for the sport, for the joy, for the challenge. A huge difference.

If you want the tools to do this, I am teaching a fine course which will give you everything you need to:

• be able to let go of every single limiting mental programme you may have
• to be full of contentment
• focus at will
• move beyond all the bits and bobs that you’ve picked up which lead to suffering and struggle and self-sabotage in the first place.

Simple and easy.

15-17 April are the dates for this weekend course, and you are able to resit it, as many times as you like, for free. A excellent deal. Email me for more details and to book your place.Simple and easy.

Till then … keep the Peace,

- Arjuna

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FREE ebook on meditation and mindset for ending stress, struggle and self-sabotage:

http://www.arjunaishaya.com/discovermeditationandmindset

What works best for you?

So here I am this afternoon, writing today’s email yesterday. Amazin’ huh? Organised.

I’ve moved through coffee time earlier this morning and am now into tea time - sipping a nice cuppa Yorkshire tea - with a view for my sofa where we are going to embark on a little Ascension meditation after I whip this email up for you.

I sit on a cushion on the floor and write with my laptop on the coffee table. I love that. Means I get to look out the window at everyone walking by. It means I have to be neat, because it’s our living room and the fiancee said I could be here as long as I vanished my stuff at relaxation time.

She is the boss, and I respect that, because when she is happy, I am happy.

My little office works most of all because I have a radiator at my back to lean and be warm against. I like that most of all.

It wouldn’t work for everyone, but I don’t expect it to, it works for me.

What works for you?

When I first learnt Ascension I was eager to be told what to do. What the perfect way of Ascending was, how should I sit, what I should eat, should I have these magic meditation beads, how about this blanket, should I wake and do it at 4am, would it be best if I woke for the sacred time to meditate, an hour and a half before dawn … ?

So many questions simply because I genuinely was excited to know, and I wanted to do my best, and ultimately “get it right”.

I was a bit put out when the Ishaya simply said: “What works for you?”

I didn’t want to know what worked for me, I wanted to know the correct method of gaining inner and outer peace in the shortest possible amount of time.

Yet everywhere I went in the Ishaya world most questions had the answer, “what works for you?”

And so now I am a teacher myself, I realise the beauty of that.

What works for you?

The best way to practice meditation is the way that works best for you. Because then you’re actually more likely to do it.

If that’s at 5am then wonderful. If that’s 10 minutes in your car at lunch, perfect. If that is sitting in lotus position on the floor, excellent. If it is on your comfy sofa with your blanky, then well done.

What if you couldn’t do it wrong, only simpler, gentler?

What would you do then?

What if the only way of doing it wrong was not to do it?

What would you do then?

You owe it to yourself to work out what works best for you. Feel free to explore, to try, but stick with what works. You also don’t want to be a butterfly, flitting from one practice to another. Little is gained that way.

Keep it simple. The truth has to be simple, otherwise it wouldn’t be the truth.

If you fancy, come and learn to Ascend. You won’t know what simple is until you do.

15-17 April - Richmond, North Yorkshire

Some seriously simple, yet strangely powerful techniques, that give you the ability to choose. Stuck in a thought? Choose an Ascension technique, go beyond it. Simple - it brings you to a state of calm, clarity and contentment - so you can do the things you love even better.

Email me for details.

Until then! Enjoy every minute.

- Arjuna

How a thought can change the world

I saw a very cool TED talk the other day about love and connection.

But before I tell you all about it - one of things that I’ve learnt from my practice of Ascension is that my attitude and thoughts affect what happens to me, even down to what other people say to me and treat me.

Isn’t that interesting?

The outside world depends on my relationship to it - what I think and believe about it.

When I was depressed and insular, the world left me alone. I thought no one cared, and low and behold, no one cared.

My practice of Ascension meditation meant that I was able to shake off the lows quicker, or operate despite them. It meant that increasingly I saw the world as a much friendlier, optimistic place. And for real - I met more and more happy and friendly people, a lot more. It was like the sun came out.

The world isn’t an external thing at all, it very much is dependent on how I approach it.

I think it was the writer Anais Nin who said “we do not see the world as it is, we see it as we are”.

Explained in this TED talk was the very same thing:

The one thing that keeps everyone away from love and connection is the fear of not being worthy of love and connection.

Read that again.

For a richer experience of life, it is only your inner judgement that needs to change. If anything, the only thing you need fear is fear itself.

The people that feel the most love and connection in their lives only have it because they believe that they are worthy of it - that there is nothing “wrong” with them or that nothing needs to change for them to be loved.

As well as “worthiness”, there is a sense of okay-ness or contentment with who they are, as they are, in all their “imperfections”.

These people are able to let go of who they think they should be in order to be who they are.

And in that dynamic of being worthy now, not later when they become a “better” person - whatever that is - the outside world responds; in this case, with love and connection.

This game of life is played on an inner court. Your attitudes change the nature of your interactions and your reality.

Isn’t that cool?

It’s so nice to hear researchers are catching up.

Link to video is here if you want to see it. It’s 20 minutes long, but well worth it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o

If you want that, if you want to have more connection, more meaning in your life, however you live, then know that it’s all about your attitude.

Change your attitude, change your life.

Change the inner reactions, every one responds differently to you.

I love that because the one thing you can change is yourself.

If you want the simplest way to reset all judgements and fear, then come and learn Ascension with me. 15-17 April - come as a day student, or there is a retreat option as well.

Email me if you want a seat - don’t delay! Life is too short to live it half-arsed.

Take it easy out there, and have some fun too, okay?

- Arjuna

The shortest email I have written

Someone pointed out to me that my emails are getting longer and longer.

(You see, if you are reading this on my blog - these go out in the form of emails to my list quite regularly. Want a part of that? - sign up above, or here:)

www.arjunaishaya.com/discovermeditationandmindset

That someone was the fiancee, she who doesn’t really like reading emails so I’m not sure she’s the ideal audience for them, but anyway.

A side story: early in our relationship, when I was wooing her, I tried wooing by email and text message. She wasn’t really playing. And they say it is men that have a hard time communicating to the woman’s satisfaction. Not in my world.

But since the fiancee mentioned it, this one will be short, and concise.

In these emails, I do try and be concise. I also try and be interesting at least, and informative somehow. I figure you deserve that much.

I like my email inbox to contain nothing but fluffy nuggets of joy, inspiration and useful information. And some days I get that when I open it up.

Since I want that, that’s what I try and give to you.

But if you really don’t like them, if they are long and rambling to your dissatisfaction, please unsubscribe. The button is just here at the bottom, always.

Life is too short to be annoyed when an email shows up in your inbox, don’t you think? Especially one that you signed up for, and clicked a confirmation link for, and have a solution to.

I’ll leave you with a question:

What is one thing you will stop doing today that will make your life better in some way?

How will you “detox” one part of your day to give you a little more “ahhhhh” within it?

Cut away the unnecessary and you will find the crucial vitality you want, and deserve.

Over and out.

- Arjuna “Senor Concise”

How to be wildly happy - the fail-proof solution to all stress and struggle

The single greatest thing you can do to create happiness in your life - and by happiness I mean for you to put the word that describes your mood when everything is just peachy. It could be content, or fulfilled, or satisfied, or at peace, or anything like that. It is your life so I don’t want to put words into your head…

When I saw this in action in myself I finally saw why I got upset and stressed and struggled. It really wasn’t about the situation, but all about my reaction to the situation.

Every single time.

The single greatest thing you can do to create more happiness, instantly, is work out which things you need to totally accept and which things you can do something about.

You could sum it up by asking yourself: “Right now, what can I do?”

All stress is underlined by the feeling of being out of control. It is caused by the focus on the things that you can’t control that brings you to a place of upset.

You focus so intently on what you want to be different you totally forget everything in your life that is good, and you are in control of.

You spend forever trying to tackle the problem that all your mental and emotional capacity is taken up by the problem. You can’t do anything but focus on the problem. You get more and more wound up. More and more upset.

That’s where acceptance comes in.

In the small things that could annoy you, just being able to shrug your shoulders is such a strength.

In the huge things that might derail someone, just being able to see it clearly - at arm’s length as it were - you give yourself the headspace to do what can do and let go of everything else. Acceptance gives you peace in all trying times.

Acceptance isn’t about not being emotional or not caring or not being concerned, it is simply a clarity to see what you can and can’t do.

Acceptance is shifting your focus from what you can’t do to what you can do. And sometimes what you can do is nothing at all.

Stress is all caused from a lack of acceptance. More accurately, all unhappiness is fighting, actively resisting, that which in this moment in time is a reality.

See what you can change and what, for this moment at least, you simply must accept.

It makes all of life so simple.

Give it a try - see if you can find the acceptance point in all difficulties. Don’t give up, just see clearly what you can and can’t do right now. Maybe it’ll be different soon…

Have a great, happy day. Make the most of it!

A little bit funny story about time flying and regret

The other day I was telling someone how old I was and then the fiancee (still love using that word - so fancy pants) told me I was wrong.

That came as a considerable shock. I am not often wrong, but she proved her case with the clever (and I'm not entirely sure, honest) use of "mathematics" (whatever that is).

How did that happen? I’ve gotten to the age where I have forgotten how old I am.

Just crept up on me I guess.

I was so busy doing stuff, time just passed. My age just passed.

Funny thing time. We think we have so much of it.

Good example - I used to love to kayak on the river. It was everything to me. It was all I talked about, all I thought about. Actually, all I dreamed about too.

I finally joined the local club and got a little practice session in at the pool.

It’s been 10 years.

Something that was once so crucial to my being, and I left it so long.

Obviously I’d moved on, had different priorities so it wasn’t at the very top of my list, but I always intended on joining a club and meeting some people and doing some sooner rather than later.

The mistake with time that I made - and so many people make - is that they will get to it “later”.

The mistake is you think there will be a magic time where you have all this “free time” to do all those things you were going to do “later”.

You think you have will have time. But you don’t.

You just do ... "stuff". Time fills itself.

The sad bit? The things that would really enhance your life? These are the things that are usually pushed aside for something else, to do “later”.

Your inner commitments are reflected in what you actually do. Take a look - it’s a little shocking - but what you are actually committed to is a lot times different from what you say you are committed to.

The upshot of this is a kick in the backside, of the good variety.

If you are like me, you have so many things you want to do. So many goals and things.

But to make sure you do them, you have to actively prioritise them.

Actively remind yourself, and take the steps to make sure those things happen. Do them now, or make a date to start, and a plan.

And do it!

Otherwise you’ll be sitting here 10 years on going, “holy cow! Where did the time go?”

You don’t want to get to “later” and regret not doing it sooner. Make your actions match your true priorities.

How about today?

Do it now. Do it now. Do it now.

Lessons on being present from a half-mad genius

The film “Fight Club” was one of my favourite films for a long long time.

It’s about a couple of guys who essentially are tired of self-medicating and self-sedating with shopping, possessions, alcohol, drugs.

Tired of chasing the empty dreams of Western culture, they instead insist on finding their authentic way of being in order to squeeze the most out of life, in order to be fully and completely alive.

Well that’s my take on it. I’m no film critic.

I loved the film when I saw it in my early twenties, it was just the thing that spoke my language, spoke to me of wanting to grab life absolutely by the bells without compromise..

And it was half mad too. That always helps.

Whether you see the film or not is up to you, the point I want to make is that the author of the book is a genius.

I came across some of his quotes recently and was blown away.

If you google “chuck palahniuk quotes” you’ll see what I mean.

Well, it may be personal opinion … up to you to take it or leave it.

One quote I saw from the film is the following:

“This is your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time” - Tyler Durden

And I get it … go now, do it now, don’t wait until conditions are perfect. You can always adjust and fine tune later.

Good advice actually for me who is weaning myself off my addiction to perfection so I actually do something.

Perfection can freeze you in such a noble way: “it’s not right so I can’t send it off now” …

… and so years later I’m still doing the same thing.

Or, I can’t decide on what will be the best decision, and so no decision gets made … Years later …

I don’t know if you know that, but I do well. Nice to see because in awareness I can make adjustments for it.

So - your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time.

True, but equally true is that this is your life and it’s beginning one minute at a time.

You can begin again in each and every moment.

In fact you do - nothing of your past can touch you here, now. Its all gone. All your memories, all the stuff that happened because you were there and you lived through it?

It is now just a thought.

A firing of neurons, a connection of brain tissue, a muscle memory.

No matter if you thought you were awesome or horrible in the past, you get to start again. It doesn’t matter if you were a saint or a sinner, you get to go again.

Good news!

I leave you with the man himself:

“Your past is just a story. And once you realise this it has no power over you”

- Chuck Palahniuk

Keep the peace!

• Arjuna

p.s. if you want to know how to live this as a reality, you really need to learn to Ascend. Simple, does it for you.

When there is no way in the world you could be positive

I’ll put my hand up and say that I am guilty of telling people to choose to be more positive.

I say guilty, but I’m not sorry -  your choice to see things in a more positive light changes many things, not least your enjoyment of life.

I know the more you are positive the more life tends to be seen in a better light, i.e. your filters get polished and life just seems … easier, less of a slog.

You’re happier for no reason, just because you are alive.

Also, saw a study that said feeling grateful means your body almost doubles certain aspects of your immune system, means you have a higher oxygen uptake in your cells, creates better coherence of your heart rhythms.

Pretty cool huh?

What’s cooler is that you body doesn’t know the difference between spontaneous gratitude and mechanically “choosing” to be grateful.

You do it - you just are grateful by sitting down and doing one of them gratitude lists, and even though it may feel a bit fake, your body sits up and takes notice.

So you can fake it until you make it, until it becomes a reality.

But!

I do understand that life isn’t always fluffy rainbows and blessings and unicorns.

I know that sometimes life isn’t that cool and you’re trying hard to be positive and you just can’t do it.

No worries.

The pressure of not being positive is worse than not being positive is itself.

Do you see?

Nothing is a problem unless you make it a problem.

If you can’t be positive, if you can’t see the glass as half full, just settle for being present.

Just be okay with not being okay.

Accept, and in that acceptance, be okay with what is - even if that isn’t that good.

Don’t give up on living, just take a load of pressure off trying to be different.

That there is your choice, the choice to accept and be okay with feeling rubbish.

In a sense, you come to a place of being content … that’s not quite right as I write it, I can’t find the exact word but it’s “contentment-like” …

You come to a place where you can just be here.

The more you are here, the less you listen to the inner troll.

The less you go into the future.

The less you rehash the past.

And most importantly, the more patient you are, and understanding too, when you do those “whatever you do don’t do these things” things.

It’s not going to last forever.

Let it be there, just don’t wallow in any of it. Don’t wholesale dive in, gentle awareness and presence is enough - it’s always enough - until it changes.

Go well, keep the peace however that looks.

Beware the inner troll

You know the troll that lives in your own head? Far worse than the ones on the internet. Or the ones that live under bridges.

It is so easy to fall into harsh self-criticism. Don’t do it. The more you listen, the more it talks.

You think it’s useful feedback, but it really isn’t. It’s just self-abuse.

The times when I’ve been feeling really bad about myself have all been when I’ve done something that hasn't met my standards. I know I let myself down and perhaps hurt someone else.

That sucks, right?

It is such a cliche, but everyone does the best they can at the time with what they know.

I certainly hope that’s true, at least I hope it’s true for me.

Whether it’s true or not, I see “doing the best you can” is a means of accepting what happened, accepting so you can move on. Of not listening to the troll. The troll does not accept.

After acceptance what you need to do is make sure you don’t keep making the same mistakes.

You learn from that, if you want - get five minutes, sit (when you’re in a clear and objective space) and write all the lessons down, and then hit the reset button. Clear the plate and go again:

“What can I do now?”

One of the biggest mistakes you will ever make is listening to the troll. It is one that humans as a whole do a lot, and repeatedly do.

It’s nasty and de-motivating. It will keep you in the past forever recycling mistakes (actual and totally imagined ones). It will create all kinds of dramatic futures. It will stop you learning and getting on with making fresh choices.

You gotta stay present and away from your troll. Don’t let it get a grip on you.

The inner game is you versus your troll. He may win a point here and there, but don’t let him win the match.

Game on!

What if stress, struggle and compromise was optional?

Whatever you do, however you live, what if it is possible to be completely and constantly free of doubt, worry, fear, self-sabotage and compromise?

You never have to struggle again.

Wouldn’t that be nice?

Someone wise once said that in life “pain is inevitable, suffering is optional”.

Honestly - Things can happen that you would rather not, but they don’t have to affect your peace.

They don’t have to stop you being calm, clear and content.

When you know this, all stress becomes an option.

You may not know how to live this way, but simply hold it as a possibility - what if you were able to live this way?

Holding it as just a possibility is the greatest beginning.

Then…

Have a look at yourself first - “what choices am I making that mean I get stressed?”

“Do I want to be stressed”?

“What choices can I make that will create a different result?”

It’s easy to point the finger and find the source of stress and struggle outside of yourself, but you can be sure you have also made choices that bring you to this point.

If you want a fast path, assume that stress isn’t about the outside at all.

It is totally about your perception of events.

You are in control of your own perception and judgement.

That you can change.

Change your perception, change the fixed nature of your future plans, change your insistence that other people change… all this means you don’t get stressed.

Don’t lose your peace.

You can learn to be totally present, accepting of what is.

In that stress becomes an option.

Why not? Why not explore that? Wouldn’t it be worth being stress, struggle and compromise free?

I say it is.

Keep on truckin’ - keep on moving in that direction and you’ll get there.

Powerful motivation can come from regret

One of the most powerful realisations for me in my life was that the things I considered important, such as peace, love, not compromising, being honest, being true…

I wasn’t prioritising them.

It was like someone gave me a big slap simply because I referred to these things a lot, and yet I wasn’t putting my money where my mouth was. I wasn’t walking my talk.

I know when clarity comes, sometimes it comes with a bit of discomfort. Like a tweak of regret, or even anger towards the source, something like that.

Do you know that feeling?

But it can be good - you can use it as motivation not to compromise, to actually prioritise, to keep going.

A guy called Pat Flynn wrote about this recently. I don’t usually quote people, but it was perfect for what I was writing about this morning so I stole it:

“True motivation comes from knowing you can do better than you are, now. It's actually a little painful, like this slight twinge in the back of your neck or spleen, and it moves around. But it's there. And I think it might also called regret. You don't want that.

Motivation is all but a hedge against regret I think. It is knowing how immense you are, and believing in it, and doing something--almost, literally, anything--to prove it.”

For me motivation came just like that - in the form of wanting to avoid regret. The last thing I wanted to do was feel any regret, ever, and that really got me going.

Now I know regret it also a habit, it is a pattern of thinking that many of us have.

It isn’t useful to entertain, but it can be useful as a kick up the bum to put those important things first.

Avoid suffering, and prioritise the important things.

Simply because it’s important.

And since I am a Bright Path Ishaya meditation teacher - here is my blatant pitch:

Learn and practice Ascension.

It is the one thing that makes it easier to avoid all suffering.

It is the one thing that makes it simple to prioritise the important things.

If you keep doing the same things you’re going to get the same results. Just so you know.

Whatever you do though, enjoy yourself, ok?

Keep the peace!

Arjuna

I have courses coming up you really want to be on:

• Stroud, Gloucestershire 29-31 Jan
• Scarborough 12-14 Feb

and a mini-retreat one here in Richmond, North Yorkshire coming up in March (meaning you can come and stay with the family in home comfort, totally awesome)

Let you know dates asap.

But for everywhere else: go here and you won’t regret it.

Hit the reset button

You know - every single one of you can, at any time, at any stage, reset.

By reset, I mean simply start again - be fresh, try again, go again.

No matter what has happened, and I mean no matter what, you can begin again.

It is the simplest of things, all you have to do is be prepared to reset. All you have to do is be prepared to let go of the past and restart.

It was a revelation for me to be told that I could.

It was like I was given the permission to do my best and then no matter what just happened, clean the slate and go again.

It takes the sting out of failure - it removes that idea completely.

It becomes more about “ok, what next?”

That’s the promise of a new year too, isn’t it?

The ability to be “born again”, to go from here, to be new and have another try.

What next? No matter what happened, what is your journey?

But reset more often - make it not just a once a year deal.

Apply the reset consistently.

Start again in each and every moment - no matter what just happened, whether you think it was great or terrible, what does right now have to offer you?

Reset!

- Arjuna

ps. the greatest reset tool?

You know it:

the Bright Path Ishayas' Ascension meditation. It gives you the tools to let go. To actually get out of the loops of thinking about the same past moment.

It means you can be aware and to make another choice. It was life changing for me, and for everyone I know that just does it.

The ones that think about doing it? Not much happens. Just the same.

The ones that actually get down to business and do it? Ever increasing freedom of choice. The ability to reset and take control away from the “evil” brain within us all.

I have courses coming up you really want to be on:

• Stroud, Gloucestershire 29-31 Jan
• Scarborough 12-14 Feb

and a mini-retreat one here in Richmond, North Yorkshire coming up in March (meaning you can come and stay with the family in home comfort, totally awesome)

Let you know dates asap.

The power of your own mind - for good and for "evil"

You know, it’s clearer to me than ever the power of your own mind.

What thoughts you believe changes everything.

The story that you tell yourself, the tale that you believe to be true.

Your attitude - your mindset…

All of this has the most powerful effect on your whole life, more powerful than anything else.

It filters and colours everything.

You can change your life just by seeing clearly.

You can change your life immediately just by seeing where you limit your own self…

And making another choice.

Perception is everything.

Without clarity, by blindly believing your own mind, without a good, positive, solid, inspired glass half full attitude…

Well… nothing is enjoyable, nothing gets done.

The plan fails because you hit the smallest bump and give up.

You don’t hit your goals, your resolution is irresolute.

You stay on the (figurative or literal) couch and do the same things.

Born for greatness and total enjoyment, and you talk yourself out of it.

Now I know you don’t want that.

So:

Examine your mind carefully - nothing, nothing, nothing is true in there, it is only an option.

Don’t believe the story that you tell yourself, “That this is simply the way life is.”

It is just an option.

Choose another perspective. Choose another option.

See clearly, act clearly.

Life is in your hands.

“I do not fear death, but not living fully” - Wim Hof

The one thing that sneaks up on you that actually means you're doing great

Self-development - isn’t it a funny term? I never usually use it but somehow it popped out of my fingers this morning as I write.

You see you are already developed.

A more accurate term would be self-remembering.

In this game of self-development or self-remembering you get the clarity to remember and to be who you really are more and more.

It’s a nice thing when you realise because there can be such a push to become like someone else. To “evolve”. The pressure to be what you “should” be takes away all the fun.

If you already are developed, then it is a matter of slipping back into some familiar slippers and simply being that best version of you.

Any path worth it’s salt should be all about you being aware of those barriers to being the best version so in that awareness you can go beyond them. Ascend them, if you prefer.

However, in this game the one thing that will always get you is the belief that nothing has changed, that you’re still the same old person with the same old bad habits and bad reactions and badness in general.

Be careful when this thought comes up. I say “when” because it seems to come up for everyone.

It’s not true, just because it’s there. Nothing is true, just an option.

It’s just this option is particularly tempting to believe.

The fact is that you are not the same person you were. If you keep walking your path of remembering, you become that great version of yourself more and more.

In the remembering you lose the ability to compare. You are simply you more and more. You don’t realise how much you are you because there you are, right here, right now.

There is nothing else.

The ability to compare dies because you increasingly simply are, you have no interest in who you were or who you “should” be.

You see?

Perhaps not, but no matter - don’t listen to that voice.

When you hit a bump, it could be easy to look back and think nothing has changed. The fact is that everything has changed, you just can’t tell any more.

It’s a funny little quirk of this self-remembering lark - but the way out is to have that rare species around you known as “trusted others”.

“Trusted Others?”: People you can trust to give you feedback, advice, support. More valuable than gold, they are. But find them and use them.

Take their feedback more than your own mind’s. Because many times other people can see you clearer than you can see yourself.

Enjoy it all - don’t listen to that mad man or woman in your head.

Right. Gotta go!

Enjoy, enjoy each and every moment. Do you promise?

When all the pies have been eaten, what next?

And so we come to after Christmas, that period when we slow down the eating and drinking, take stock, wonder what promises and resolutions we might make - and which ones we’ll actually keep - for 2016.

2016! Where did that come from?

If you do make a resolution, back it up with a plan. A series of tick list type steps as in “do this, then do this, then do this”.

You see, if you just have a goal but no plan there is no way you're going to get there.

When you have a plan - if you stick to it, you cannot fail. 

Unless it is the wrong plan, but that is another matter. Make the right plan!

And then get support.

No one becomes greater by accident. It takes a desire to have more, and it takes others to nurture and support that desire.

Someone like a mentor or a coach is invaluable to shaping and directing and providing clarity.

Two things for you to ponder and then to collect about your personage:

Who are your mentors?

Start looking for one and they will come. When the student is ready, the teacher appears.

And…

Who do you actively look after? Who do you nurture?

It's easy to complain about the state of the world today, but what do you do to make a difference?

Find the answers to your own questions…

Make a plan…

Get support…

Carry it all out…

Be awesome…

Be even more amazing than before…

Repeat.