There are things in life that make us feel wonderfully alive.
Running down a mountain. A great conversation. Being with someone you love. More hot sauce. That moment when everything just clicks and you’re completely absorbed in what you’re doing.
And there are things we don’t particularly enjoy. Of course, that’s part of being human.
But here’s where it gets interesting.
We tend to think that the things we love are what make us feel alive. That the experience itself is responsible for the joy, and so when the experience ends, the joy goes with it.
Off we trot, looking for the next thing, always always looking for the next thing.
But what if we’ve got it backwards?
What if the aliveness isn’t coming from the thing you’re experiencing, but from somewhere within you?
What if those wonderful moments simply make it easier to be present which means you can notice what’s already there?
It’s been one of the great discoveries of my life.
There is a depth of peace, joy and aliveness that doesn’t depend on what’s happening around me. It’s not something I have to manufacture by thinking positively, controlling my attention, or arranging life so that everything goes my way.
It’s something I can return to.
And the more familiar I become with that space, the less I depend on life delivering the right experiences before I can enjoy being alive.
It doesn’t mean I stop having preferences. I still love what I love. I still dislike what I dislike. I’ll still choose a mountain over a traffic jam any day.
But the enjoyment of being alive doesn’t have to disappear just because life isn’t giving me what I want.
And here’s the truly cool bit.
Not only do you have that same space within, and just need the right guidance to live from that more, but –
When you stop depending on experiences to make you feel alive, you’re actually freer to enjoy them.
Not less engaged with life, but more.
Sound like a good idea?