Surviving your own family

So how was your Easter? Thought I’d say hi — I don’t have any message for you, nothing about rebirth, new starts, choosing to hit the reset button and begin again any time you like. Nothing like that. You can take something from that list if you like though, for sure!

I had a couple of days with extended family, just enjoying life. Nice to switch off and do nothing but read a book and chat and go for a walk (and a kayak - although cold, that’s always a joy!) and cook and hang out.

You know, I believe the ability to tune into this precise moment in time and to make the very most of what is in front of you — no matter what that may be — could be one of the most important skills you can ever develop.

To stop dwelling on a past that is gone and a future that is beyond your control, and to thrive now, independent of the circumstances you find yourself in — rather than surviving until your life looks the way you want it to is rare, very rare.

Where this becomes relevant to Easter, is family time. For some, family time together just means you get a bit edgy, tempers start to fray, arguments start or resurface - at the very least.

Amazing how family, like no one else, can poke and prod you and create such a reaction and emotion, isn’t it? So many people ask me about this.

You can’t choose your family, for sure, and so if you need to take time out from them for your own sanity, well I for one think that is a great idea.

What you CAN do, however, is simply love them exactly as they are. A lot of us try and change our partners and our family to a huge degree, and that is always a recipe for disaster — in my opinion.

Accepting and allowing goes a long way with family (with anyone actually) — and means YOU have a peaceful life. Instead of fighting and insisting they are a particular way, you stop struggling and can make the most of who they are.

Perhaps that means you don’t spend a lot of time with them. But for sure, loving them exactly as they are means you spend a ton less energy and time getting upset with them - and that is always the bottom line: you’re setting up your life so that you always enjoy this moment, and the people in it, to the maximum.

How can I enjoy this moment more?

If you find yourself a bit miserable, then so often the answer is to get out of the past and the future and make the most of what you do have, instead of insisting of what you should have.

It's a practice - you have to practice this. You can't just turn it on any more than I can just balance on my nose without practicing. OK?

And there is more to it than that, but for a cheeky blog that will suffice.

For a short “hello”, turns out I had something to say after all. How about that? Wonders never cease, do they?

You’re awesome, thank you for reading, and if there’s anything I can do for you, let me know. Go well! Arjuna

PS. Of course, having the tools to be present, the tools that bring you to a state of enjoyment is super, super useful. Here's my free guide to how to be more present, less stressed and to freely choose to enjoy this moment, no matter what:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

They said I laughed too much

Have you ever been criticised for laughing too much? I know, there are some times that just aren’t appropriate for sniggering like a school kid at the back of the class.

But I really thought it WAS ok to let go a little and, well, chuckle.

( Just like this young lady above, laughing it up with a big simian. I guess you had to be there to get the joke, huh?) You see, and I forgot about it until someone reminded me, a while back I was messing around with recording some talks and a guided meditation for a meditation timer app called Insight Timer.

Insight Timer is super cool - you get stars for when you regularly do a session. Everyone loves stars!

So I’m talking about meditation and awareness and mindfulness and how we get stressed and overwhelmed and negative and what you can do about it. And the whole thing really is a little humorous because we do some daft things in our own heads, believing weird stuff and getting involved in imaginary conversations with imaginary voices, and all the rest of it.

At least I do — and to me that is a cause for a little giggle. A chuckle. Some mirth.

Some of the reviews said it wasn’t a laughing matter, however. And I see it’s ruined my average review rating which, given the nature of this email, I shouldn’t really be grumpy about. Ha!

Taking yourself seriously however seems to be rampant in the world. I can understand when you’re tuning into a guided meditation (as opposed to a talk) and you’re trying real hard to relax and zone out (maybe the trying was the problem?) … but still, a little humour goes a long way.

Can you laugh at yourself?

Imagine all the times when you get stressed, if instead — and you might well have done this before — you just chuckled? Instead of taking offence and wanting to prove yourself right, you giggled, and let it be? It's really good revenge when someone says something that's off to you, and you just giggle. Tee hee ...

I know - easier to say and harder to do, but it IS something you can practice.

Taking things seriously just means you’re attached to a certain result. You're fixed on your plan, and your plan only. You want something to happen in a certain way. You have expectations that are unmovable. You want to be right, you’re insisting on this or that. You have no flexibility. You, grasshopper, are like the rigid oak that snaps in the storm, and unlike the bamboo that bends and bounces back.

And then life gets tough.

So as my Bright Path Ishayas’ Ascension meditation teacher suggests, why don’t you try taking things a touch less seriously today than you did yesterday? Try and prioritise your levels of calm and happiness first.

Just a touch more that yesterday … and see what happens.

Alrighty? Let me know.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. If you want to have a listen then go right ahead. Download the Insight Timer app and search for me. Just know that there is only one guided meditation — where I am super serious and I have my soft and silky guided mediation voice on. It's called “Noticing Now” I believe. The others are talks for your education and entertainment. And may involve me sniggering to myself.

I’m not sure of the quality so excuse that. I was messing around and now I’m reminded I’ll do more.

PPS. While you’re there, if you want, join the Bright Path Ishayas’ Ascension group. You DO NOT have needed to learn, but I post a weekly homework topic there which sometimes I write and sometimes other people write. It may well inspire you and/or give you something to play with during the week.

PPS. Guided meditations are wonderful. However, if you want to cut the cord and get really independent with this — and it can be soooooo simple — it’s worth while learning some techniques.

Here’s a free guide to what you need to know:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Are you the only one?

Do you ever wake in the middle of the night, unable to sleep, your thoughts going a million miles an hour? You’re unable to shut them up and get back to sleep so you give up, get up and raid the fridge? (yom yom yom -but then that weight goes on which gives you something else to chastise yourself about?) Are worry and doubt and anxiety just a normal part of your day? Do you worry, going over something you’ve said because the way someone MIGHT have taken it? Do you ever just panic, anxiety causing a knot in your stomach and your whole system a buzzing just from some irrational — or perhaps completely rational but debilitating — fear?

Have you ever struggled to do something, anything, because your own head — what a traitor! — has turned against you and is busy shouting what a loser you are? Or you’ve made the smallest of mistakes and your head (traitor!!) keeps going on about it, not letting you move on?

You too? Oh my goodness! I thought I was the only one.

All of the above and more used to be a regular occurrence for me. I knew how good life could be, but I knew how shocking my fear and worry and self-doubt could be too. It was plenty of motivation to do something about my own head's negativity and overwhelm.

If I can get beyond these habits — and they are habits, learned ways of responding to the world — you can also learn to leave them behind. Honestly, you can.

I know what it’s like to look around and think that you are the only one struggling. That everyone else seems to have it all sorted, all easy, perfected. I thought I was the only one sharing a life with a traitor in my own skull.

If I can move beyond it, so can you. Promise.

What it takes it becoming more aware of what the voice in your head is telling you. In this awareness you can come to make a different choice. You can distract yourself from all of the trouble, and focus on what you want to focus on: like the good things of life, the things you DO have, or your actual options right now rather than irrational and/or constant “what if?” fears.

It takes practicing relaxing and training your attention on a regular basis. That is all. If you’ve had enough of negativity and overwhelm, you’ll have plenty of motivation for practicing this awareness and attention shifting on a daily basis. And that will bring you to a different state of being, a different way of living very quickly.

It will. If I can do it, so can you.

But it helps, it does, to know you’re not the only one. And that there’s a way out. And that you are enough, you are wonderful, you are doing a fine job all things considering — no matter what your own head says.

That’s me. Thank you for taking the time to read this. It all begins with a shift within you, a shift you can carry out. Not only does all of your life benefit, but so does everyone around you too. By changing yourself, you help change the world.

True that.

Go well! Arjuna

PS.

People often say, "awareness is all well and good, but what can I DO????" They want something concrete -- things to do, to practice. Here’s what I have for you: www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

PPS.

Questions? Let me know - I'd love to help!

What are you addicted to?

A question from a reader on this fine morning - “Are addictions a means of escaping something deeper?”

And my answer was -

“Could be, most certainly they could be.” (how’s that for definite?- Ha!)

You see, they don’t even need to be very “bad” addictions, like heroin or cheesecake or something. They can be anything to distract or numb or sedate even.

We are very good at attempting to run away from big decisions - somehow sitting on the fence seems so much easier than actually jumping and committing to a course, any course, of action doesn’t it?

We are also very good at avoiding looking at an part of our lives that may not be wholly satisfying too. Where we are obviously compromising and suffering because of it.

Distraction and sedation seems like a great option. “If I dig deep into something else, perhaps the decision or the problem will go away …”

And anything will do - reading, TV, shopping, eating, exercise, travel … knitting … cheesecake ... You can try anything in the attempt to cover up.

What I was personally trying to cover up was this annoying voice at the back of my head that would spout “Is THIS is? Is this ALL your life is about? What is the POINT?” all the time.

It was massively confusing, even depressing, because I had all my external, “facts of life” (not those facts) covered - great house, job, friends, hobbies, everything I wanted, I had.

None of it would quieten that inner voice of dissatisfaction. Weird huh?

I tried so hard to cover it up with more and more of the externals - and nothing worked. The more I tried, the more dissatisfied I got. The fact was that I had no internal wellbeing. No stability at all. No connection with my spiritual anchor. I couldn’t choose to be happy no matter what.

Funny old thing - it took so little to fill that inner hole but it made a huge difference to everything I did. All the “externals” came alive. A little bit of time nurturing my inner self and my outer world got so much more satisfying.

I no longer needed to do anything, I wanted to. A huge difference.

AND all the stress, struggles, overwhelm, the self-doubt and the self-criticism … all of that started to fade away too.

It’s one of the most important things you can do - sort out your inner life … your inner spiritual anchor, get the ability to be happy and at peace no matter what. Because then every decision, every compromise, every cause of stress, every thing gets simpler, more straightforward.

You hide no longer - which is an amazing thing. Your life gets better and better and better.

How about that then?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Getting the ability to be able to sort out your inner life and choose your own happiness - to have it uncaused - is simply a matter of practicing the right things. Few people actually know these things. If you want to know?

I have a free guide here, detailing exactly what you need to do:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

The wisdom of a child is a wondrous thing

Every morning I sit with Bubba and have breakfast. I used to cover her in a kind of backward shirt so she wouldn’t get food stains all over her, now I cover myself. Proximity to someone who is learning how to throw is a dangerous business. <---- This one IS trouble, I can tell you.

But to get to my point. One day I found myself - in a moment of awareness - repeating parental mantras. These have little to do with meditation and everything to do with desperation … “But you LIKE avocado!!”

I have realised Bubs will not eat what she does not want to. Being a female, and related very closely to Sumati, she knows her own mind. One day egg is the flavour of the day, the next I’m dodging as it’s being flung at me.

There is no routine is what I’m trying to say. And I may be giving lofty spiritual attributes to something that has none - but it would seem she eats according to an inner wisdom - what she needs not what she wants. Some days she eats nothing at all, some days she eats like a rugby team.

It’s not about “its breakfast time, I SHOULD eat” but more like “what do I really need right now?”

We all have this inner wisdom, down deep beneath all the accumulated layers of belief and cultural instruction and past experience. It’s whispering to us all the time, it just gets swamped by everything else. Your ideal life comes from listening to and living from your innate wisdom. Trouble and strife only comes when you start listening to those second and third thoughts that doubt. “But what will everyone else think?” …

That is why I don’t put much stock in moral codes of behaviour. As soon as someone starts telling you to live this way and not that way, you’re getting quite divisive. How about this moment and that moment? How about these people? There’s always an exception, always an "us and them" is created and then what? What does your moral code say then?

I was told I should always eat breakfast. How’s that for a moral imperative? Turns out my body often functions better without it. Especially when I’m coming down with a flu or whatever - a quick fast can heal things quite nicely before it gets worse.

Bubba shows me that all the time.

So meditate - one of the greatest things it will give you is the awareness and the clarity of your own course of wisdom that is precisely matched to the moment you find yourself in. You become super familiar with it - and it’s always there, meditation gives you the space and the silence to tune into it.

What is possible for you - yes, you - is an ideal life, lived in perfect response to now, in perfect flow with - and never against - this moment. And you have to do so little to gain so much.

Alrighty? Go well! Arjuna

PS. I’m chuckling to myself because the book I'm finishing off is a kind of instructional manual to end overwhelm and negativity, be the best version of yourself, and have a darn tooting great life.

It could be seen as a set of moral guidelines - and yet! I start with Buddha who talks about being a scientist about everything. Listen to advice, test it out if it seems like something you agree with, but don’t agree simply because of authority. Fully try it and see if it works for you. And in all the best moral guidelines and practices will always point the finger back at your own heart: What do YOU really know?

PPS.

You'd like to know how to meditate? How to be more aware and tune into your own inner source of wisdom, avoiding struggle and overwhelm and negativity?

Here you go:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Facebook is evil! (perhaps)

People are currently talking about Facebook and how addictive it is. They're talking about how impressionable (young and old) minds are being swayed this way and that. They're talking about how perhaps Facebook should be forced to do this and that, and perhaps generally not be so interesting. Maybe. I'm trivialising and being dramatic. All at the same time! Ha!

(And look! That guy is lifting not one, but TWO Facebooks!)

Here’s my take on the monolith that is Facebook - and in fact, all the "evils" of life. There perhaps is a place, on a case by case basis, for management of access to certain things that may be addictive. Especially in the young. Alcohol, drugs, sugar, guacamole … you know, all the fun things.

Or maybe we should just equip each and every person with a mentor. Someone wise and experienced who will explain and guide and yet allow people to make mistakes and work out that some things just take you in the wrong direction when overdone. That would be super cool.

However, before we get to that, I’m going to talk to you, as you are, right now - yes, YOU and what you can do for yourself.

In order to make your journey through life more comfortable, you can try and carpet the whole world … or you can put something under your own feet.

Ironing out ALL the wrinkles and challenges and sticky sharp things in the world is tricky, probably impossible. Putting something under your own feet? Super simple, right?

You can delete Facebook, throw your phone away, pack your job in, shift to a tropical island to avoid traffic and other people … OR you can learn to change how you react to these things. Wouldn’t that be simpler?

In a world where you will be externally out of control at least some of the time, if not many times … why not learn to control what you can?

Actually ... What can you control? What can you learn to control?

The stuff of life, the circumstances, the events, the people? Not always, not often, sometimes never. But you CAN control your choices, you can control your habitual reactions. At least you can learn to control them.

And that is where a regular practice of something like the Bright Path Ishayas Ascension comes in.

You get to see where your choice lays - how ultimately all of life begins from your attitude, your response and reaction to circumstances, your blaming or taking responsibility for your own actions.

Start there.

Unchain yourself from your reactions, your addictions, from your limitations, from the things within you that are holding you back and then see what life becomes, what Facebook becomes, what stress becomes.

Pad your own feet first and then see what might be done with the wrinkles of the world.

Start within, then move without (though don’t wait for perfection, you’ll course adjust as you go).

Awesome, you're awesome, I’m done - and have a great day!

Go well, Arjuna

And here’s how you learn to have freedom of choice. It's a free guide so you can get started right now. But ask me if you have any questions too:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Stop it!

If there is one thing I could tell my younger self, it would be the following. It would save so much heart ache, stress and delay I can’t tell you how much. I feel it’s possibly very important for you too, that’s why I sat down and tapped this out. So pay attention - yes, you at the back, you too!

I don’t have much more of a story around this, so let’s get started:

My practice of the Bright Path Ishayas Ascension could be seen as a practice of transformation. It’s a practice that allows you to become that great version of you. Any meditation practice worth it’s salt (which, if I’m brutally honest, there are surprisingly few, actually) will do the same.

The fact is that great version of you already exists. Right here, right now.

You ARE it.

A practice such as Ascension takes away the blocks that stops you from being and living that, right now.

It may well transform you in ways you might not even know, but the beauty, the simplicity, the truth is that you are already what you seek.

Stop waiting.

It’ll take courage. It will. I don't care how brave you think you are, this is the real test.

One of the most courageous things you can do is live like there is nothing wrong with you, that you ARE enough, that you need NOTHING else to live the life you’re supposed to.

(and if you do need something? You’ll be shown it, you don’t need to seek it out).

Stop waiting for change. If you can’t change it now, work with what you have. This is it, stop postponing, stop waiting for a better future moment, a better future you.

This is not a practice of becoming, even though you become.

This is a practice of no-holds barred LIVING, because there is no time like the present, because there is no better version of you coming in some better future moment.

Grip the bull by the horns and dance, by the light of the moon if you like poetry, but dance now. Don’t sit on the sidelines, WAITING … OK? Good. Go well!

Arjuna

PS. Want a piece of THAT pie?

Here's 2 free guides to get started, right now:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

PPS. Hows the picture for a shaggy dance partner?

Why you should be kind to yourself first

(<--- Here's a picture of how being kind to yourself which allows you to be awesome might look) Last blog I talked about President Obama and how he constantly taught his daughters to “be kind, be helpful”.

But how can you be kind and be helpful to others unless you also are kind and helpful to yourself?

I feel like I talk about this a lot, but it’s such a big thing.

It really IS a big thing - honestly - the voice in your head is so unforgiving about you and your mistakes. You will drive yourself into the ground trying to prove all manner of things to that voice and what you believe the people around you want you to be.

Being kind and being helpful to everyone begins within you.

Understanding that the voice of harshness and criticism doesn’t need to be listened to is a great start. Being aware of it but not following it (the half-step back) is super kind and helpful - to you.

Then it can run out of steam, run out of momentum - no longer are you swimming in negativity and you can also shift to appreciation. You can celebrate what you have done, what you have achieved, how great you actually are. You can understand that you’re doing your best and tomorrow you’ll do better.

When you do master that voice, you are truly able to be kind to anyone and everyone. Without mastering that voice? You cannot be truly kind, not fully.

Any worth while project in life always has its foundation within.

Mastering the inner game means you master the outer game. Take the time to come to grips with all your learned and limited beliefs and habits and you’ll be able to live as the very best version of you.

Alrighty? You’re awesome.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Mastering the inner game … being able to be kind even to that voice of harshness and doubt and criticism and negativity? Here's a free guide to doing just that:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Words of wisdom from an ex-President

I was reading an article by former President Obama’s official photographer recently. This guy lived in Obama’s pocket for several years, so got to know Obama very well. The thing that struck me was what Obama repeatedly told his daughters - and given the world and it’s seeming current emphasis on division and trolling and arguments and “I’m right and you’re wrong”, I think it’s particularly apt. Obama always told his daughters: “Be kind, be helpful”.

You’re never too big to help and to be kind. In fact, the more success you enjoy, the more important it is to help where you can and to be kind.

It takes so little to think of someone else but it makes a world of difference - not only in creating a better world but also for you. Countless studies have shown the personal power of having an attitude of being of service, of giving to others - you win when you give.

So why not, why not have an attitude to be kind and be helpful, where you can? What you give is exactly what you tend to get.

The things that will stop you doing this and make you self-absorbed? Exhaustion and tiredness is one. They mean you get snappy, you get selfish, it all becomes about you and what you can get. And that is a very small, grey world indeed.

Take time to recharge so you can live the life you want to live, be that awesome version of you.

Alrighty?

Go well, Arjuna

PS. Let me know if I can help with any of this, ok? PPS.

“Be kind, be helpful” is one of the things that come very quickly just from a practice of meditation and mindfulness. I've written a snazzy (and free) guide for you, if you're interested:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

What can you learn from exhaustion?

I’m back from my holidays! How wonderful is it to travel? It is one of my favourite things. I love seeing new places and eating new food. That’s the main reason - I think my life revolves around food. Food, food, and more food. Oh - I’m getting distracted. Here’s what I learnt in my travels:

Flying to New Zealand from the UK takes a) a very, very long time, b) awesome amounts of luggage for a being that is so small (see picture for a representation of what Bubba packed), and c) a certain kind of insanity to believe you’ll get any rest with a 1 year old in tow.

Now I’m pretty level headed. I don’t get thrown by much, truly. It's not because I'm special, simply because I made it my mission to not be. Since practicing and teaching the Bright Path Ishayas’ meditation malarky for nearly 15 years it’s given me much in terms of not being automatically triggered by people and situations.

The thing that I saw in my travels was how wild my emotions and reactions started to get just due to good old exhaustion. Snappyness - that short fuse that shows itself to no one but your nearest and dearest … and depression - that aimless, soul-less, juice-less greyness of “there’s no point” all due to just being plain old knackered.

Rest is an easy solution, job done - although to many people that is the last thing they will let themselves do - but when you have another 7 hour flight to go? Being aware of what’s boiling away inside and not taking it seriously is the way forward. You can safely ignore it, it doesn’t need any attention, it doesn’t require you working out “why?”, it’s all simply because you are tired … you see?

In awareness you just become extra careful in not following those internals. Easy peasy - when you’ve done the work before hand. That’s the real thing about a meditation practice. It DOES slow and eventually end negative reactions like anger and depression and anxiety but it also means you become MORE aware of them arising within you sooner.

Being more aware is a great thing, but many people misunderstand it. You WANT to be more aware. All so you can not let anything take you over and do things that you regret later on. All so you can shift your attention to that still silent presence that is beyond all these things.

I hope that makes sense, I’m still jet lagged, but its an important point. You don’t need to stop thoughts or emotions - that is HARD work, and ultimately impossible - you just need to start having a different relationship with them.

They don't need to go. You just need to be aware of when you're getting lost in them. Freedom from negativity and limitation is, in part, having no care whether these thoughts and feelings are there or not. And it just takes practice. It’s a kind of internal strength and flexibility you see, a skill you can practice.

All it takes is you sitting down and closing your eyes regularly. A small sacrifice for freedom in your life, is it not? Let me know if you need help with what to do.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. The thing I will recommend to get started with is right here, after this link. It's a free report on all the hows you need to get going, complete with FAQs:

https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb

Don’t invite this person to a movie

Ever seen a film that you really wanted to see and you’re really getting into - and you have that annoying friend who keeps asking: “wait - what was that about?” - wanting to discuss and question and analyse the whole thing, the whole time, pulling you out of the magic of the film and making you miss so much? Oh boy, they never get an invitation again - do they? The funny thing is that is just what your mind does to your life. You’re less IN it and more sitting back and analysing it and questioning. Sure sucks out the magic real quick.

In your most alive moments, you have no care for questioning and analysing. You’re too busy, wide open mouthed, going “whoa!!”

All of your life CAN be like that - a most amazing thing that you’re super excited to a part of, super immersed in. Ironically you don’t need to change a thing about your life to get that. Your life doesn’t need to change, just your attitude to it.

Have the attitude of not wanting to miss a single moment … “Sorry I can’t get upset, I don’t want to miss what’s going on”

“Sorry I have no time to wonder why that happened to me, because it’s all happening right now!”

“Sorry, I don’t want to analyse what she said or what he said or what they could possibly be thinking because I have a life, and it’s happening and I DON’T WANT TO MISS A SINGLE MOMENT.

That single attitude will change everything.

Life is happening right in front of you - except we think the future will be better and so miss out on right now for something that is imaginary.

Don’t lose reality to imagination. Dreams and memories are important but this here is everything.

Alright?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. and as always, let me know how I can help.

If you want the simplest most powerful tools that erase all the blocks to you being present and here and making the most of this?

Come along and I’ll show you everything you need to know and nothing you don’t. https://www.thebrightpath.com/course/first-sphere-mini-retreat-option-united-kingdom-richmond-north-yorkshire-0

Oh I know, BUT your opponent isn’t really your opponent

It can be tough this path. You’d think being present and making the most of life is a simple thing. Well - actually it IS simple, it’s just that your opponent is a little tricky. And when I say “tough” I don’t mean it takes effort - but having the stubbornness of a mule is a useful trait to cultivate. Your opponent? What do I mean? For sure, it’s not a battle but a game - the inner game. The foundation of your life has little to do with outside forces and everything to do with how you view it. When the best version of you is in charge, everything about life is peachy. When the opponent is in control, it’s tougher.

And like all your loved ones, your inner opponent knows precisely how to push your buttons. So you react like never before to the voice in your head. It knows exactly what you fear the most and exactly what you dislike the most, so it will bring it up as often as possible - usually at 2am when you’re exhausted and/or going through a tough life experience - perhaps a breakup or serious illness to someone you love.

This is what I know …

You will get there. You will get to a place where you can ignore each and every negative or overwhelming thought. You will.

The biggest spoiler of all is that everything turns out ok. It does. But your job is to simply keep going. To focus on what you want to grow. Stay as present as you can - you will get distracted but with all the gentle stubbornness in the world, jump back on track.

Know and expect the inner voice of doom and gloom and worry. Give her or him a name - it’s your pet monkey and it’s a little nervous right now. It isn’t even your opponent, it’s something that needs reassuring, to feel safe - that’s all.

One step at a time and you will get there. Just keep going. Especially when times are tough, you may feel like giving up, that you’ll never get there - just make it about one moment at a time. You can manage the greatest of challenges, one step at a time.

You will get there, everything will turn out just fine.

Alright? Let me know how I can help.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. If you’d like to come and learn the tools I use myself every single day? Come along and I'll tell you everything I know and give you all the support you want and need, for life: https://www.thebrightpath.com/course/first-sphere-mini-retreat-option-united-kingdom-richmond-north-yorkshire-0

Don’t half-arse it

The thing about humans is that we are incredible time-travellers. We need no machines - we’re all over the place in our heads. We are SO good at time travelling, we rarely spend any time here. True! It’s the world’s greatest problem. Being able to be fully here for any significant length of time without being distracted by the next shiny thing ... Ooh shiney! So instead of just making a cup of tea you’re thinking about what you should have said to that woman this morning. You’re sitting with your partner and yet you’re back at work. You’re on the phone talking with someone yet trying to find that date when you’ll be free whilst making toast for your kids. You’re listening to someone yet you’re not listening - you’re already replying in your head.

We’re constantly half-arsing life. Trying to do at least two things at once, and all of them suffer for it.

Stress ends and life gets amazing when you show up for it. Showing up for it is completely related to your ability to:

1. do one thing at a time 2. give 100% attention to that one thing you are doing

It is that simple folks, I promise you!

Think about it - how good is that film when you’re also on Facebook, flicking through? Flick through Facebook or watch the film. Either / or - not everything at once. You can’t do it.

One thing at a time, give it your full attention.

Great stuff! Nice chatting with you, put that into practice, ok?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. A decent meditation technique, of course, gives you the ability to develop this one thing at a time approach to life. 100% attention means you can focus on what you want, and ignore what you don’t.

So very good. Here’s a free guide that I put together so you can master your mind and have more fun than ever before:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

How you can master the negative, whiney, stressed part of your mind

There is a very wise man called Dan John. His specialty is training people to get strong (I guess - my specialty is not, so I’m not 100% sure). What I love is that as well as being into muscles, he’s a philosopher as well - he lectures in Religious Studies at a university level. I love soaking in the wisdom of wise people. The kind of people like Dan who you wished were your uncle or your neighbour, so you could hang out and get wise through just being close to them.

He said that there 3 things you need to do to get good at anything, anything at all - and this goes very well with mastering your mind. Why? Because it is the exact same process as learning any skill.

Are you ready? They are:

1. Show up - i.e. be consistent, no one is an overnight success at anything 2. Don’t quit - i.e. be stubborn enough to keep going until you get there 3. Ask questions - i.e. be courageous enough to risk looking silly and ask everything you have

And at the risk of ruining a wise man’s words by adding my own, I would throw in:

4. Enjoy the process -

i.e. it’s your choice whether you’re miserable or content, whether you’re so far ahead of yourself and lost in your future goal or whether you are present to each and every step along the way, whether you enjoy this moment or not where ever you find yourself.

What do you reckon about that? Keep everything that simple and you'll fly.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. And of course, if you’d like to learn what I use to master my mind, to keep the overwhelm, the nastiness, the worry away? This is what I recommend:

https://www.thebrightpath.com/course/first-sphere-mini-retreat-option-united-kingdom-richmond-north-yorkshire-0

PPS. I'm still travelling about in New Zealand, and having a lovely time thanks. Turns out these will be less frequent in coming, but rest assured I do still love, appreciate and respect you. If you need anything? If I can help? Please just drop me a line. Talk more soon.

They know where you are, ALL the time

Listening to the radio the other afternoon - Sumati likes to have music on when she’s in the kitchen. And she is a great cook, so whatever she needs to get in the zone is fine with me, you know? Usually I don’t like listening to radio DJs, they tend to prattle. However this one time was very interesting to me.

You know there’s a feature on your mobile where your loved ones can tell where you are at all times? Like a locater rescue beacon but perhaps more sinister.

The story came that the DJ was in the gym and noticed the guy, the same guy every time, just sitting in the corner on his phone. He asked phone guy what he was up to.

Phone guy explains: “Well, you see my girlfriend knows where I am. A while back I promised to go to the gym because she wanted me to, and now she checks. So I come here and watch Netflix”.

Ooh.

Is it just me, or is there something a bit mad about that? I get doing things because Sumati wants me to, I get the “giving-ness” of doing that when you’re in a relationship with someone. However, I WANT to. I want to do the things that are really important to her. It’s really no biggie if I tidy away the toilet roll inners rather than following my natural tendency (which is to build a little cardboard pyramid with them) … And yet - if I’m doing things for her or anyone and in my heart of hearts I really don’t want to, then resentment builds … right?

Doing things you really really don’t want to just because you don’t want to communicate it out is a recipe for disaster. Sucking it up and keeping the peace is one thing, a great thing, and yet sometimes you have to be honest. Because if you’re not honest about the things that you really do and don’t want to do now, you’ll be forced to be honest about them later. And that is quite often significantly explosive and messier.

What kind of life is it not truly living your life?

Indeed. Go well! Arjuna

PS. Free guide to meditation and mindfulness? Why not ?… Be warned though, it has the tendency to change your life. If I would say one thing it has given me, it is the ability to be authentic while being able to give to others so much more. Finding that balance of “me” and “you”:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Patience and other boring things

Apparently the average human has the attention span that is less than a goldfish. What a joke that is.

No focus, no patience, no immersion in this moment. No flow, no satisfaction ... nothing and nowhere.

Bored already? Well leave this here, cos this isn’t for you. But it could be the greatest thing you learn to do. If you're bored, you're wasting your life.

For sure, patience sounds boring. Like something your gran would tell you to do.

But when you want something to happen and you’ve done all that you can, patience is your greatest friend. If you want to do something but have no idea what, patience is your best buddy. If you have a problem and need an answer, looked everywhere and can't find one, then patience is your BFF …

However - If you’re waiting at all, then stop … why wait? Why delay your life AT ALL until a future moment comes along that you hope is better, bolder, more beautiful?

Patience. It’s not even the opposite of waiting. When you get good at it, you no longer need patience. Weird huh? Patience is only necessary when you’re begging for the future to arrive, now.

Same deal with boredom - it always exists when your mind’s attention is in the future.

Master future surfing, master your mind, master waiting, impatience and boredom. And a host of other things ...

Honestly - life is far too short to waste on waiting and being bored. When you get aware and mindful your life really starts to come alive. Not WHEN your life changes in someway, but simply because you fully show up to now to you life, exactly as it is.

Discover what it means to truly be alive. How wonderful would that be?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Try these free guides out - we talk so much about the way you’re living life and how a few adjustments mean you can make it a completely different affair. Impatience, boredom, stress, negativity, wasting life … all flipped on their heads, for you:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

When it's so complex you can't be bothered even starting

In life there are those who want to measure and study something from a distance and then there are those - bless their souls - who want to get face first in and experience it. Taste it!

Take chocolate - or a fine whisky - or a sunny day - or anything you love ... you can analyse the heck out of it OR you can get down and immerse yourself in it.

Just think about it OR fully experience it it? What would YOU prefer?

I know what I prefer.

Every now and then I go onto various meditation and mindfulness forums and see what’s happening, see what’s being talked about, see if I can learn something, see if I can lend a hand or some advice to someone.

Every single time I’ve quit within ten minutes. 5 minutes actually. Perhaps I should persevere but some of the denizens of the internet just bore me super quick.

There is a bunch of people trying to make meditation and mindfulness so complicated, using foreign languages and jazzy terms and arguing about this state of being and that state of being … doing anything it seems EXCEPT for actually experiencing what they are talking about.

Because when you actually experience it you have little concern to argue about it. You kinda just shrug your shoulders and walk away and go and hang out with people who taste it - because they are so much more fun.

Simplicity is the height of gloriousness. Simplicity is good, simplicity is true, simplicity is what you deserve. Complication, on the other hand, kills all enthusiasm, and I believe, denotes wanting to measure something rather than actually face first experience it.

Being stress free is your natural state of being. Meditation, believe it or not, is your natural state of being. Mindfulness and awareness, is your natural state of being. Being content and calm and clear with a half-step back is your natural state of being.

Kids do it - you’ve forgotten it. That is all. Don’t complicate this, please don’t … there’s absolutely no need. It’s the simplest thing in the world. And experience it! Experience now. This is it. You cannot think about it, you can only do it. Freedom from all suffering lies within you, right here, right now.

If you have a “formal” meditation practice great. If you Ascend, great. If you do “the pause” and regularly just stop as you listen to music (or silence) or drink tea or read or breathe or exercise or knit then wonderful.

Whatever you do, switch off regularly, get to know the comfort and the calm that comes with your own presence and you are golden.

Keep it simple, and just do it, ok?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Of course, I think of an eyes closed meditation practice as an incredible boost to your sanity. If you want to be the sanest person alive, a simple meditation practice will furnish you with that quickity quick. Here’s a few things I wrote for you, and it's free:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

The advice of the wise is often lost on the ignorant, such as myself

Back in the day when my Ishayas’ Ascension meditation teacher had only a few students I would get the chance to talk to him by phone. This was awesome. A supremely wise expert, on tap. I remember, as is often the case with the advice of the wise, it took a while to filter in through the various stages of cotton wool that seems to exist in between my ears.

We would be chatting and I would say, “you know, I really have trouble staying present and using the techniques you taught me when I’m on the computer”.

“Are you on the computer now?” he would ask.

“No, but this morning I was, and it’s a real problem because I get stressed about this and that and when will I get good enough blah blah blah …” I would prattle on.

“Are you present now?” he would ask.

“Of course I freaking am, I’m talking to you” I would THINK, but because I don’t like to swear too much: “Absolutely boss, certainly, incredibly, there’s no one more present than me right now, apart from your good self of course” I would actually SAY (or something similar).

“When I get present and manage to end stress and negativity I wonder how cool my life would be? What do you think?” I would enquire.

“Can you choose to be present now, make the most of this and let the future you sort itself out?” he would say.

And so on, and so on. I just wouldn’t get it. Sometimes the truth is so simple it's easy to miss. But fortunately he stuck in there, kept saying the same things in different ways, and now, I do. I do get it.

This is the only moment you can do anything. Here it is. You can ponder about all manner of things, you can wonder how you might live this moment better, but ultimately what beats all of that is simply and absolutely just showing up to now.

This is it. Doesn’t matter what happened this morning, doesn’t matter what you did last night, who cares what you will be like when you’re enlightened, the moment you have is now.

Now, now, now, now. Oh - and now.

This is the path and the destination. Just now. Keep it simple and soak in it.

Alright?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. I have some free guides and a Facebook group that - if you liked the above words - and also want to live forever present, will help you in numerous ways. Head this way:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

What sacrifice would you make for the perfect life?

That title is a touch dramatic, isn’t it? But after talking with someone the other day, I realised an important point. One that is so obvious now, but perhaps isn’t that clear to many people.

Now - I realise some of you are busy. I realise you sacrifice a lot already. I get that - read this carefully. Don’t add to your weight of life by misunderstanding what I’m saying, ok? I want to help you live a lighter life, not a heavier one. And if you have a question about this, get in touch. Alrighty? The important point is that to get anything, anything at all, you have to sacrifice something else.

To lose weight, you have to sacrifice certain foods, as well as time and effort to do some exercise. To learn to master your mind, and overwhelm and negativity along with it, you have to sacrifice time and a small amount of effort so you can practice it. You have to sacrifice those times when everyone else is watching Netflix - for example.

Or, perhaps you really want to watch the Game of Thrones with everyone, so you decide to wake up early and practice before everyone else has awoken. But then the sacrifice is having to get up out of bed early, when you’re sleepy and cosy, and it’s dark and cold.

There is always a sacrifice to be made in order to gain anything.

The trouble happens when you focus on what you’re sacrificing. You become so fixed on the missing the Game of Thrones (with that glass of wine) that you COMPLETELY miss what you’re gaining from your sacrifice. You miss the joy of improving, of becoming greater.

You don’t appreciate what you’re getting, and that is the reason why you pack it all in and go back to the same old, same old. I got this from Bubba - she who must be obeyed --->

I realise that I will never have a sleep in again. I will never just throw my kayak in the car and head off for a 5 day adventure on the spur of the moment. I will never be able to leave my book on the floor where she can chew it to pieces.

Now - I can resent her for making me make that sacrifice, or I can enjoy what she gives me - which is a huge amount of joy and a reminder of being constantly in the Now. And who could resent that cute little zombie face?

This goes with anything. Everything has a price. But - if you’re smart, you’ll see that everything has a reward too. You can resent the price, or you can enjoy the reward.

All this means is if you’re going to do something, make sure you really want to do it. Make sure you really focus on the reward, not on what you’re giving up.

And then it’s not really a sacrifice is it? It’s just a means to an end. It’s following that which gives you greater and greater joy.

Focus on the silver lining, always. It will transform your life.

Questions? Let me know, I’d love to help out if I can. Go well! Arjuna

PS. After all that, learning to master your mind and the chaos that goes with it requires very little sacrifice. Sure - you have to sit down and close your eyes consistently, but it’s such a pleasurable thing. Relaxing, time to yourself, recharging, it really is simple.

Gandhi said once reason he meditated was because it gave him more time in his busy day.

So do something! If you're interested, here’s some things I put together for you, for free:

www.arjunaishaya/freestuff

Perfect slice of wisdom for you

One of the members of my Facebook group for my free 7 day mindfulness challenge said something there recently that is pure magic: “When you get present and aware, you realise that the small things are actually the big things”.

That is SO true, and such a rewarding perspective. What a slice of wisdom (my favourite slice, closely followed by pizza slice) -and she knows it because she experiences it, it's not just a nice bunch of wise words - they are lived. All the seemingly big "important" stuff? All the stuff that takes up most of your attention? Your to do list with all it’s haste and hustle and bustle and what not?

They ARE important, but at the same time they aren't really that important - at the end of the day - are they? ... and that is the clarity you get.

The small stuff, the things you probably take for granted? Like when Bubba is trying to get my attention and I just want to finish one more line of ... this. She won't be trying to get my attention forever ... yet her little smile is the most important thing in the world to me.

When you practice mindfulness and meditation you actually start to live a life aligned with what is TRULY Important to you, and that is a very very satisfying way to live life.

So this isn't just a nice trick to deal with stress, it's the way you discover what it means to truly be alive. Then you can really shine!

That’s what I reckon anyway - why not give it a try and prove me wrong? Go on.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Here you go - some things you want to learn that will make you wise. Simple, powerful, relaxing, transformative:

www.arjunaishaya.com/freestuff

Live the wisdom! Be the wisdom!