Friday 13th! Shock and horror? or Awe and wonder?

Friday the 13th! Loving it. Is it bad luck? Was that black cat walking in front of you good luck or not so good luck?

I can’t remember for the life of me.

What I do remember - and love - is when I realised that I created my own luck.

When I was a young fella I told myself that every time I saw a bird that it meant I was going to have a wonderful day.

Had quite a few great days starting from that basis.

Then there was the time I decided that every thing, every single thing that happened to me, all of it was so I could grow bigger and better and bolder and have more fun.

And do you know what?

Everything that happened from that point on was clearly so I could learn more and become more! Amazing huh?!

Everything was so I could be more bold, or more humble, or more present, or more fluid, or more clear, or more forgiving, or more communicative, or less whiney…

Amazing how it works...

It was like I had miraculously enrolled in some crash course in evolution.

“You want the greatest life possible…? Coming right up!”

Boom, boom, boom.

It’s your choice whether you let something define you or whether you define it.

What do you want?

Are you going to allow something to control and shape you? Or do you say, well actually here’s how I see it? Do you shape it how you see fit?

Good news or bad? Disaster or opportunity?

Which one was it again?

Keep on going out there. You can do this.

Mastery in action, practice makes perfect.

What is your priority today?

So in your urgent list of things to do today, what will you make your foundation? You may have sorted the “what you need to do”, have you sorted the how?

In other words, what mode of operation are you prioritising today?

Is it get everything done, no matter what?

Or stay calm, clear and centred, no matter what?

I’m not saying don’t be busy, don’t get excited, don’t get passionate, or be real and honest…

What I mean is don’t lose it - whatever “it” may be to you.

Feel yourself winding up, getting a little tense at work?

What is the priority of today, of your life?

Take a moment. Come back down.

Feeling a little down, or negative? A few doubts or worries running amok in your head?

Are you going to entertain them, or choose to do something different?

Take a moment, shift your attention.

Life is too short to get wound up in the little stuff.

Or even the big stuff for that matter.

Stay cool, keep having fun.

It is a habit you can create, for sure. And it’s worth everything.

OK?

Today, prioritise peace first.

Tomorrow, you may want to do the same thing.

Cause for regret? or cause for hope?

We’ve all had things that we have done, or have had done to us, that cause regret, anger, dismay. But have you ever considered that your past - all of it - has brought you right here, to this moment, to being the person who is looking through your eyes at these words?

Without your past you wouldn’t be here, right now.

It can be a cause for hope. From your past understanding you can create a different future.

Knowing what you know, given that you can choose to see the glass as half full or half empty, where do you want to go now? How do you want to play this?

It’s never too late. You can create a different future for yourself and everyone else anytime you wish.

My Ascension meditation teacher - a very wise man - once told me that the reason I experienced everything in the past was so I could help others from experience.

When someone sits with me and shares a story about their past that relates to mine, it’s simple. I know because I have lived through it too. If I hadn’t lived through it, how could I hope to relate?

Sometimes the silver lining is in the understanding.

Because of your past you understand to a deeper level. Because of the understanding, you can truly help another. Theory is nothing, experience is everything.

If you regret anything at all, it’s simply because you are now different. You wouldn’t regret it if you hadn't changed.

You can regret the time spent stumbling in the dark, or you can embrace the fact that right now, the light is on.

If you are still doing the same things that cause you regret, when are you going to get help to make sure you change? Doing the same things and expecting a different result is lunacy.

Now, you can make any decision, any choice you wish. You may have habits and addictions to the contrary, but why not start by making the choice to do and see life differently?

The more you make a different choice, the more that choice will become habit. A habit is a word that means natural - easy in other words.

You only stand to lose regret, anger and dismay yet you stand to gain everything - hope, joy, contentment, presence, expansion, Life.

Each and every moment can be filled with contentment, clarity and calm. Every moment. Why not start now?

Keep it simple.

Focus on the simple things. Best advice that I have ever been given.

Life is so easy when you keep it simple. And becomes so extraordinarily tricky when we don’t.

Saw something I posted on Facebook years ago. It was actually a nice reminder.

The image had the following words on it:

Why complicate life?

Missing someone? - Call them Want to meet up? - Invite Want to be understood? - Explain Have questions? - Ask Don’t like something? - Say it Like something? - State it Want something? - Ask for it Love someone? - Tell them

A little cheese perhaps, but how often are you this straight up and clear?

We actually think too much about things, and often times in the thinking create a problem that doesn’t exist.

We create unnecessary drama, all in our own head.

We don’t just declare what we want. We expect people to give it to us, to mind read. Ever do that in a romantic relationship? (No? Are you sure?)

We read into comments, facial expressions, actions and in-actions, and interpret intentions and feelings and then create a future that isn’t actually real.

We take a lot of things personally. “She’s looking grumpy and it’s all because she thinks I’m an idiot.” Nope, she just has trouble with her digestion.

All a waste of energy.

Keep it simple.

Be as clear as you can.

You want something? Ask clearly as possible, and see what happens.

Think someone thinks badly of you? Go and have a quiet chat, see if it is so.

Appreciate what someone does for you? Make them aware of your appreciation.

Uncertain? Seek clarification, sooner rather than later.

Have something to say? You have to say it.

You have to contribute to your life, otherwise you are just a spectator, and likely to be an increasingly frustrated one at that.

Be bold and keep it simple!

You will have more fun and have more energy. And you will help others to the same.

The Silver Lining.

What is a good result?

Is it getting what you want in the short term? Or having a deeper understanding, a better perspective, “growing as a person” because you didn’t get what you wanted?

Have you ever lived through something that wasn’t pleasant at the time but now when you look back, you’re actually glad it did happen, simply because a lot of good came from it?

When my mum died, fairly young, of cancer - that wasn’t a good time. But it was the most amazing of times too, simply because I got to know her on such a deeper level. It was quality time, indeed. The same with my brother. I am so much closer to him now than ever before.

The silver lining, and one that may not have happened if mum hadn't gotten sick, is that I no longer have the mediocre relationships I used to have with my family.

The other thing that became so clear was that any future thoughts, with all the doctors’ prognoses (of which there were plenty) and lots of worry about mum, only led to suffering. I had to be very present otherwise I would instantly dissolve into a ball of worry and anxiety.

I got to see my mind clearly, and didn't go there. It was too painful.

So I was super present, and was able to be with mum as she was, not as I thought she would be in the future. We actually had a lot of fun.

The fact is you can frame any experience any way you want. It can be good, it can be bad. That label changes you.

I say always choose to see the good. If it’s a challenging situation you especially need to find a silver lining. Find a benefit to you and focus on that.

There is a story that my meditation teacher tells. He doesn’t tell it so often anymore, probably because he knows that his students steal all his best ideas quickly, so he has to constantly come up with new material.

But it’s about a villager who, to cut a long story short, has an amazing thing happen to him. He shrugs his shoulders and says “Good news? Bad news? Who knows?”. The next day the amazing thing has lead to something terrible. Again, he shrugs his shoulders and says “Good news? Bad news? Who knows?”. The next day the terrible thing turns out to be a blessing in disguise, and again, he simply shrugs, and says “Good news? Bad news? Who knows?”.

Who knows why things happen? Who knows what will happen next? I don’t.

Just assume all is good. In this moment focus on the silver lining. Make the most of what you have. Be wide open and see what happens next. You may be surprised.

Have a great weekend - enjoy each and every moment of it.

___________________________

Want the greatest tools for being mentally fit, fluid and free? Weekend retreat in Richmond, North Yorkshire, 20-22 November Coming would be one of the best decisions you ever make...

Stay inspired.

"All the effort in the world won’t matter if you’re not inspired"- Chuck Palahniuk

One of my daily rituals is making sure I stay inspired. I think in this game of life it is one of the greatest things you can do to make sure you play well.

It’s easy to let the humdrum and the routine mean that another day fades into the background. A week passes, a month, a year. You postpone, you do the same things, it’s easy to forget what you are living for.

Inspiration is your life-blood, it is the thing that ensures you live the life that you want. Without it, it is a grey life indeed. Without inspiration you have nothing.

Inspiration is reminding myself of my most important thing so I keep it as a priority in the day.

Many things clammer for attention, but what is truly important to you?

What is the bottom line of your life?

For me, above all other things, it is living a life of connection. Of choosing to be filled with presence and contentment. Of appreciation and gratitude for the simple fact that I am alive. For being of service in some way to other people. For being as clear and honest as I can be. For that sense of aliveness and connection to this moment that means I am all of these things and more.

What helps remind you? What inspires you?

Surround yourself with the greatest people you can find. Whether that is in person or via phone, email, text, it doesn’t matter. Tap into that goodness.

Read and watch what inspires and educates and motivates. With the internet, TV, and books there is so much out there to use.

Go places and do things that inspire and excite you. Every now and then see if you can take time out to retreat and re-prioritise. Whether that’s half a day or a week, find the time.

In little and large ways, create a bath of inspiration that you can soak in, so you stay committed to what is important.

You gotta stay inspired, and only you know how that best works for you. Let inspiration be the basis of all your actions.

Keeping the important things truly important.

I got an email from Brasil (spelt with an ’s’ of course) the other day.

I’m impressed about that, and I’m probably showing off by mentioning that the writer is from Brasil. It might appear that I'm attempting to impress upon you that I’m very international, but I am telling you of this, fundamentally, because the writer asked a very cool question.

On the back of the blog of the other day about non-seriousness, what do you do when you are in a serious situation, like when you are fighting an injustice or saving lives (not from death, but from less than optimal conditions)? Which she is - she’s not just posing a hypothetical “what if?”

How do you take action but not be affected by these very serious, very real things?

Well, it depends what the bottom line is for you.

The core of any solution will be the thing that is most important to you.

Do you know what that is for you?

At the end of your life, when you look back, what do you wish your life to be filled with?

Chances are that most important thing is something like peace and happiness and love.

If that is the case, then no matter what you do - in everything you do - have your priority as peace and happiness and love.

It doesn't mean don't take action, but don't lose sight of what is the most important thing. Otherwise you lose everything.

Don’t lose yourself in the circumstances of life, even when the circumstances of life appear important, crucial even.

The true test of a lady or a gentleman of the highest standing is their ability to hold the important things truly important, and not let seemingly urgent things take precedence instead.

To do so, it can help to treat life like a game.

Play to win, but know it is a game. Seriousness only comes in when you could win or lose. Play well and play fully, but the fact is that in the great game of life the only time you lose is when you forget your connection with what is truly of the highest importance to you.

And so keep peace and happiness and love as a priority in all things, have a smile and a light heart, and see what happens from there.

The right course of action always reveals itself from this foundation.

It's mastery in action so don't worry if you forget. You will get better at remembering. The only thing that is truly important is that you remember in this moment.

________________

By now you probably heard that I’m having a meditation weekend here in Richmond, North Yorkshire.

I’m excited about it, I love sharing this stuff. To be able to teach the Bright Path Ishayas’ Ascension over a whole weekend is even better. A privilege.

You see the techniques are so simple, yet so powerful. The truth always is. If it’s not simple, it simply isn’t the truth. I would like to claim that quote but a much wiser colleague of mine got there first.

But these techniques have given me so much, and continue to do so, that to be able to teach them to others is a supreme joy.

If you want to live the best possible life, I recommend booking on the weekend. You won’t look back.

20-22 November 2015 - Friday 7-10pm, Saturday and Sunday 10am - 5pm.

It’s closer than you think too - by fast train 2.5 hours from London and 2 hours from Edinburgh, and then a little drive out to the venue.

And you can come stay if you want (necessary I would have thought if you live down south or up further north) meaning your bed is 30 seconds from the course. Awesome. Roll out of bed, coffee/tea and then the day begins.

For more details click here, or email me, I’d love to chat.

Resistance is futile - there is an easier way.

"You are the only problem you will ever have and you are the only solution." - Bob Proctor

Resistance is the thing that kills all enjoyment and effectiveness.

The cause of all your problems is resisting what is happening.

I get to talk to a lot of people so I get to have a good overall view on what causes people pain and suffering.

Every time any one ever has a problem - and I mean 100% of the time: not even most of the time but all of the time - the problem is caused by resisting what is happening.

I will talk to them and they will use words like “should” or “could”, some kind of idea that involves their ideal present moment.

I will nod, and politely agree, that actually this ideal would be nice, but what is happening right now is different.

Do you see the difference between what is happening and your idea of what should be happening?

The only time you have a problem is when you can’t give up the should.

When you come to terms with what is, when you fully accept it, all your pain goes away.

Then, and only then, you can work with what you have, rather than wishing for something else, or insisting that something else should be happening.

Non-resistance isn’t giving up your dreams or living a passive life, it simply is seeing the clearest way through. It’s full acceptance of the current situation yes, but it doesn't mean stop walking towards what you want. That's giving up.

You really are the source of all problems and all solutions. When you see how you create all peace or pain in your life you will learn true happiness.

It's all within you - which is cause for rejoicing. You are the one person in the whole world you can actually change.

Taking nothing seriously - the most important thing you can do.

The one single biggest thing you can do to have a better life?

Take nothing seriously.

It's such an old Ishaya principle, it's almost a motto.

But it is such an uncommon skill amongst humanity it's worth repeating, frequently.

Taking nothing seriously is crucial to the full enjoyment of life. Obviously. As the joke goes, none of us are getting out of here alive, so why not fully enjoy it?

But it’s also not just being a goof.

When you have a sense of lightness it automatically means you have things in perspective. Perspective means you have clarity, it means you aren’t getting sucked into the thing.

You can then be fluid, adjust easily, be wide open to different ideas. You can make the most of what actually is happening rather than trying to stick with some plan of what “should be” happening.

When you take things seriously it’s the spark that invites a fight.

Instead of laughing and letting it slide, the resistance builds and the fight blows up - unless you back down.

But when you don’t play the game, you are removed from the game. Job done. There is no struggle, ever.

So don’t even invite a fight, just take nothing seriously. Stop playing the game.

Keep what is most important to you as a priority. And that isn’t being right, it’s being happy.

I imagine. Unless being right is more important to you than your mental, emotional and physical health and wellbeing, in which case go ahead and try and be right.

Take nothing seriously. Be aware - learn to laugh at everything, most crucially yourself. If you are able to do that you'll have a source of entertainment forever.

The wisdom of choosing to be happy.

"Oh, I don't really think about that, because it's wasted energy, isn't it? What's done is done, we can't change that, but we can change the way we cope with it."

- Diane Piper, mother of Katie whose face was burnt in an acid attack, when asked how she felt about the attackers

Everyone has challenges. Everyone has troubles in their life.

But what amazes and inspires me is seeing people who have lived or are living through horrific things and yet who shine, full of gratitude and love for their life, as it is.

You might call them “glass half full” people.

Then there are those with comparatively event free lives who grumble and complain through every little inconvenience: “Glass half empty” people.

Why is that?

You constantly choose your response to life.

This choice defines how you live, regardless of the circumstances you find yourself in. This choice is total: You decide whether you live in peace or in suffering. No one and nothing can cause you to suffer; you decide to suffer.

I know it doesn’t feel like this. No one wants to suffer, everyone is looking for a way to avoid it. The trouble is we don’t know how.

Furthermore, suffering has become normal, it’s almost expected as “part of life”.

Being constantly happy is viewed with suspicion by some. If you decide not to suffer it’s almost like you’re not being “real”, whatever that is.

Once, a friend of mine who realised it was her choice to be totally at peace with the world was taken aside by a acquaintance in the street and asked if she was on drugs.

Bizarre isn't it? Happy lady, walking down the street = must be on drugs.

But definitely those, like Buddha and Jesus, who have transcended suffering are elevated to a mythical status, beyond humanity.

Actually, it’s your human birthright not to suffer.

Your birthright is to have absolute sovereignty over your responses to life. Complete freedom from suffering is simple.

It all begins with you deciding to take responsibility for how you feel, how you react to life.

Don’t take this decision lightly - it means you can never blame anyone else for anything. It’s all on you.

Then, decide that nothing will make you happy - you won’t delay your happiness for a future moment, you’ll find happiness right now, however your circumstances.

No longer will you wait for your partner or a new TV to make you happy. Now you’re going to choose to have happiness that is uncaused.

That is it. Take responsibility for your own happiness, and then choose it.

You will come to a point where you'll realise that to choose anything else is madness. And therein lies true wisdom.

Your life is your attitude.

"We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms -- to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." -Viktor Frankl

Sometimes I get accused of being unrealistic, harping on about the need for living life with the glass half full. People say that having a constant positive mental attitude is a nice idea, but sometimes life isn’t like that, that positivity is sometimes ignoring reality.

But what is real? What is reality?

Here’s what I see: You shape reality by *how* you see *what* you experience. It is all about your perception. Nothing is real, beyond your thinking about it.

Do you realise this?

Here is your life, and here are your mental processes about your life. They are the same thing. Your life isn’t different from the filters that you maintain – the judgements, the beliefs, the attitudes.

You, and you alone, define your own life. That’s what you get to choose, and no one can take that away from you. It is your internal attitude that shapes and makes everything. This choice is total – the experience of hell or heaven depends on you.

Your life isn’t about the circumstances, your life is always about your response to these circumstances.

You decide how you will respond to everything. Engage this choice, it is one of the most precious things you possess. Choose to see the good, to appreciate. Choose to be thankful. Choose to love.

Choose and choose again until it becomes a habit. And then choose once more. You will come to a place where nothing can make you suffer, unless you consciously allow it.

Heaven or hell? It all starts with your attitude.

Fear is more closely related to love than you know

A wise man once said that the opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference.

If that is the case, and I believe it is, fear isn’t the opposite of love either.

Fear is actually more closely related to love than you know.

It is an emotional response to the unknown and the uncontrollable.

Some shut down in the face of fear. They try to grab and hold tight until the storm passes.

Others open up.

They know that fear only comes when something is important to you. If it’s not important you would be indifferent, you see?

Fear means it is important to you and therefore can be a reliable indicator to head in that direction, to investigate, to be aware.

When something requires courage to do, don’t delay, don’t dilly dally - therein lies your passion and your purpose. Therein lies what is important and where your love dwells.

Go that way. Don't let fear stop you.

_______________________________

ps. the top quote and the subject for this blog came from a cool book by Steven Pressfield which I just read:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/War-Art-Through-Creative-Battles/dp/1936891026/ref=sr_1_5?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1439380612&sr=1-5&keywords=steven+pressfield

The hidden danger of indifference

“The opposite of love isn't hate; it's indifference” - Steven Pressfield

Indifference is a very subtle beast, yet once fallen into leads a long way down a grey and winding path indeed.

Like a sleepwalker wandering deeper and deeper into the forest, life becomes lost not through deliberate choice but through not paying attention.

Its a truism that you don’t know how good you have it until its gone.

What you have to do today becomes more important than what is here, already. The lack takes our attention instead - what is missing.

This focus, continued for long enough, means life becomes one constant question: “Why?”

“Why is this happening to me?”, “why doesn’t life go the way I want it to?”, “why isn’t this working?”, “why does she have all the good luck?”.

Indifference directly leads to living life with the perspective of a victim, one long grey, whiney, blame and stress filled existence.

The solution lies not in the past or in some future time, but here, is this exact moment.

Pay attention, for what you focus on grows. Be not indifferent, or take things for granted. Base your life in the appreciation and gratitude for what you do have, right now.

Through continued nurturing and choice, the automatic - the natural - response and reaction to life becomes not one of “why?” but one of “wow”.

Richness and blessings lie solely in perspective. And now you know.

You may not be able to control the circumstances of your life, but you can control how you react to it. It’s not about the what, its all about the how.

Don’t allow life to unconsciously slip away.

Your life is your choice.

I am halfway through spending three months in a retreat centre in Spain, teaching yoga and The Bright Path Ishayas’ Ascension meditation. Life is pretty darn good, as you might expect. The weather is sensational and we are surrounded by mountains and forests in which I get to run and explore on my days off.

Best of all, I get to live with all kinds of amazing people. There are some seriously cool human beings here.

One is a young fella from Norway called Thomas. Thomas is blind from birth but has the greatest attitude to life. He doesn’t let anything stop him from doing what he wants.

Try walking around your house with your eyes closed. Try doing yoga - or simply stand on one foot - with your eyes closed. Try just eating with your eyes closed.

Now imagine what it would be like to get yourself downtown and find the shop you want. Or get yourself to an airport and fly to another country where you don’t speak the language.

And everything he does, he does it all laughing, all day long.

The effect on everyone else is huge.

First of all, no one can complain about their small problems any more. Thomas and his attitude puts everything in perspective. They drop their “stuff” and just get on with life, enjoying it, squeezing this moment for what it has.

Second of all, everyone wants to help him out. He’s such a joy to be around, everyone wants to be around him.

You see, life follows a series of fairly simple rules. One of these is that what you put your attention on, grows.

If you focus on what you don’t have, on what is missing, on things that you regret then you end up complaining and in misery.

If, on the other hand, if you focus on the good, on what is great about your life, about what you do have - no matter how small - you will have an amazing time.

Since you have choice, how do you want to live?

Thomas walks into plenty of walls, but he never stops exploring, and he never stops smiling.

You, and you alone, define your life.

When you take responsibility for defining your life, you shake the world. When you refuse to be a victim to circumstance and just play your cards as you have them, you not only live a great life, you inspire everyone.

All your heroes have done nothing but the same: “I’m not waiting for someone to give me life, I'm going to take it.”

Choose to be a hero.

The way to happiness, part 2.

Happiness. Why are so many people searching for happiness? Why doesn’t it come naturally to humans? Well, it does, actually. It is your true nature to be happy. It is very easy to be continually happy when you know how. Honestly, I speak the truth as one who has experienced unhappiness, stress, times of depression, anxiety, fear, all of those things that we don’t like. If I can find constant happiness, you can.

Life does not need to be ups and downs. That is not part of being human, it doesn’t have to be part of the deal. Suffering is not necessary, I promise.

If you like that idea, then you are in the right place. Just assuming it as a simple possibility is the first step to experiencing complete happiness and contentment, in every aspect of your life.

Last blog (see here if you missed it) I talked about how people expect that people, things, possessions, careers etc., etc., will make them happy. It’s not true. Make happiness an inside job, make it about not getting but being. Happiness is an attitude. First be happy, make it a foundation, then live your life.

The second reason why you aren’t continuously happy is this:

• You don’t make it a priority.

What is the most important thing to you? If you could give your loved ones one thing, anything at all, what would you give them?

Everyone I ask this question tell me some version of happiness. When it comes down to it, happiness is the most important thing to everyone. Everyone just wants to be happy.

But they don’t prioritise it.

It is well down the list of things to do.

Their lists are full of things to get and to achieve and to do, and then, right at the bottom, last on the list, when they have time to get to it, is to be happy.

Only because we believe after I do x, y or z, then I can be happy. Work first, finish things to do, and then be happy.

Nope, doesn’t work, you never get there.

If you are interested in being happy you have to be like an Olympic athlete of happiness.

Focus.

Make happiness the core of everything you do. Make it first and the middle and last. Train to be happy. Make everything about internal happiness.

Then, and only then, it comes and gets you. You realise that you are happy for no reason at all. Nothing can give you happiness, you just choose it. Nothing can take it away either. You prefer things go a certain way, but either way you are happy.

Practice. You need to prioritise and practice. Close your eyes every day and meditate. Keep it simple and joyful. If you want it simple, and joyful then learn the Bright Path Ishayas’ Ascension. Fastest path to happiness ever. I promise.

Be happy!

The way to happiness, part 1.

Just watched a film called "Hector and the search for happiness". It was alright, not amazing but not awful. But... it involves a psychiatrist who realises he’s not happy and he can’t help his patients be happy so he takes a journey to see if he can find happiness.

Many adventures later and he comes back to his girlfriend and his home, where - surprise, surprise - happiness was all along. I’m sure there’s a moral in there somewhere.

There are so many films and books about happiness at the moment. But shouldn’t happiness be normal? Not only a human right, but a human reality?

Obviously happiness is being missed by so many. Why don’t a big chunk of the population consistently experience happiness? More importantly, the question is: Why don’t you experience happiness all of the time?

Here’s the first reason why (look for the second reason in the next blog):

• You don’t know where to find it.

Stop looking for something or someone to make you happy.

Happiness is an inside job, always and forever. Things don’t make you happy, you decide to be happy and go from there. Happiness is never given to you, happiness is an attitude that you choose, no matter your circumstances.

Remember Golden Rule of Existence #41: ”It is never the situation, only, always and forever it is your reaction to the situation” .

You aren’t so much in control of the circumstances (although you’ll try hard to be - stop controlling, by the way), you are totally 100% in control of your reaction.

If you are looking for happiness in a person, in possessions, in travel, in anything, you will miss out, always. These things are to be enjoyed, but happiness does not lie in them.

We have it backwards. “When I have x, y, or z, I will be happy”. Nope. Be happy first.

Consider happiness as being your base, your foundation. If you have a solid happy foundation, everything you add to it will only be more and more enjoyable and life affirming. If you have no foundation, nothing you throw on top will satisfy. Make sense?

It will require practice. To make happiness your foundation in the quickest amount of time the best practice I know is to meditate. Better still learn the Bright Path Ishayas’ Ascension. If you have already learnt, make sure you close your eyes every day. It’s important.

Okay?

Look within. Be happy, enjoy everything.

Part two soon.

Be the change...

“Be the change you wish to see in the world” - Gandhi It is a fascinating and inviolable certainty of this world:

What you give tends to be what you get.

If you are smart, and you are smart otherwise you wouldn’t be reading this, you may come to the following conclusion:

If you get what you give it would be a good idea to give what you want to receive.

It works at the most basic level: If you want more hugs, give more hugs. If you want happier people around you, be more happy. If you want more love, give more love.

But it even works at a more subtle and abstract level.

If you want more understanding, give more understanding.

If you want more honesty, be more honest.

More clarity? Be clearer.

More patience and tolerance and mutual respect? Be all of that.

It’s the coolest thing once you see it. Loving, open, happy people have a whole world that is loving and open and happy. They attract very similar people. Scared and anxious people tend to create events and people that make them scared and anxious, giving them more reason to be scared and anxious.

Now: If you find yourself pointing the finger at people and insisting that they are more x, y or z, for whatever reason, it's an excellent sign you need to look at yourself.

Be the change you wish to see in the world. That single act, bringing the focus of change to within yourself changes more than you can possibly imagine. It all starts with you.

Ever tried to actually change someone? In fact, do you realise you try and change all your loved ones? Stop, its futile. People dig their heels in deep when they feel someone is trying to change them. But they do respond to a) openness and b) change in others. It all points back to you.

But don’t take my word for it, do it. Even if you disagree, try it. Prove me (and Gandhi) wrong by putting your money where your mouth is.

Save the world starting with yourself. You are the one person you can change. Might as well get going.

Give yourself an "A"

What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail? How would you be if you knew the future was going to turn out perfectly? 

Keep the door of possibility wide open. Go beyond the voice that says you might fail, that something might go wrong, that you are not good enough.

The inner critic can only see limitation, it cannot see potential and possibility. Infinity is far too much for the mind to grasp, and that is why is focusses on the small: on Lack, what you don't have and what might go wrong.

Believe in this and the world gets squashed and grey, and you along with it.

What if you flipped this Lack thought? Do you ever focus on what might go right? That you are more than good enough?

Why not?

Why not embrace an attitude of vision and of possibility? Instead of listening to the "you should" or the "you need to", why not go with the "what if?" and the "how about?"…?

Drop the limitations. They are only imagined, they only have power because you believe them. Instead, give yourself an “A”, in advance - focus on the possibility of the greatness of what could happen.

Assume an attitude that lights up your life, and in doing so lights up the life of all those around you.

Assume an attitude that everything will turn out just fine. Be supremely present in this knowing. How do you live in this knowing?

And why not? Wouldn't this one shift make your life amazing?

Attitude informs everything.

check out Benjamin Zander here in this video for more.

Take not a thing seriously.

The single greatest thing you can do to be more clear, calm and collected is to not take anything seriously. If you don't take anything seriously you won’t take anything personally.

If you don’t take anything personally you won’t get stuck in drama and blame and resentment and anger and all of that.

If you don’t get stuck in drama you can see clearly, you can see the big picture, you’ll have options.

If you have options you can do stuff easier and have more fun doing it. It’ll become an endless upward spirally loop of greater and greater joy.

Let me reassure you: The path to being the best version of yourself is through increasing amounts of joy. The enlightened beings I have met all laugh their arses off, constantly.

And here is the thing - a happy, joyful destination cannot be gained through a serious path. It is impossible.

This is good news. Awesome news actually. and its easy.

As my meditation teacher says, don’t worry about forever, just take nothing seriously today. Start small, but start now. If you like it, do it tomorrow. You may just find you keep doing it.

Find ways to laugh at everything, including yourself. Nothing need to be serious. Nothing benefits from seriousness. Even the most serious discussions benefit from levity.

Hang out with the happy people. Help others laugh at themselves, help them lighten their load. Don’t take anything seriously. Life is too short not to.

Gratitude - simple, powerful, but rarely done.

My computer died the other day. Completely kaput. Funny how I can use something everyday and not really notice how much a part of my life it had become until it was no longer there.

You ever notice that?

How something can be essential in your life and yet you only truly appreciate it when its gone?

One of the most inspiring stories I have ever heard was regarding a woman who lost her legs in a bomb attack on the London Underground. Years later she was interviewed and what struck me was her attitude. I can’t find the interview so I can’t directly quote what she had to say, but essentially she said the day she lost her legs was the day her life started.

You see before that day she was in survival mode, just getting by - alive but not really Living. A cycle of wake, work, sleep, repeat. Her overwhelming response when she came to in the hospital was one of gratitude for being given a chance to live. Her focus was not on the legs that she had lost but the fact that she was still alive.

The bomb was her wake up call - it shifted her attention from merely surviving to truly living. It shifted her focus from what she didn’t have to what she did have. It showed her she didn't have any time to take anything for granted, that life itself is an incredible gift.

I see so many people who don’t realise how truly rich they are. They have so much, and yet they don't realise it simply because they take big chunks of their life for granted.

I had an ear infection the other day meaning I had no balance. Even the act of sitting up in bed and getting to the bathroom was a major achievement. As the infection left, how sweet was it to walk freely? Very.

I can’t tell you how powerful the simple act of being grateful is. Going out of your way to be thankful transforms your attitude to life. The simple fact that you are alive becomes a source of richness and wonder.

If you decide to be actively grateful, even for the small things, the following will happen:

You will become very present

Your life will come truly alive. It will become a continuing source of satisfaction.

Your relationships will grow and become deeper - simply because you are nurturing them.

You will complain less and less.

You will be less able to stay self absorbed, in worry or guilt or doubt.

You will realise how the world transforms according to your attitude.

You will realise that your happiness is your choice.

You will become someone who others want to be around. Your happiness will inspire others to be happy.

There’s probably a hundred more, but try it, live it for yourself.

You want more from life? Start by being grateful.