Indeed, NO is sometimes best

Last email was all about how any relationship transforms when you give to it. When you give first, you create the very real possibility of enjoying a rich, alive, fun relationship. I said to give and give and give.

And yet! Sometimes the most giving thing you can do is say “NO” … is not give.

“Wha?!"

I don’t say this to annoy you, but done from a foundation of giving and appreciation, saying no to someone is sometimes the greatest thing you can do.

I used to say YES to everyone and everything. I wondered why there was zero time for me and what I wanted to do. I started to resent people asking for things or advice. Starting to say no was a revelation to me, it really was.

Saying no, also for example, means you can make the time to sit down and meditate. This in turn means you can recharge and refresh, gain a million and one physical, emotional, mental and spiritual benefits and therefore run closer to 100% than 0% (like so many people do).

When you’re running on 100% everyone wins. You can give so much more, and in ways that mean you don’t start to resent anyone.

So sometimes saying NO means you can say YES so much more.

Interesting huh?

Now, there’s no rule book for this. Get present and you’ll find out when and where you might like to say NO more.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. More awareness, more presence in your life? You gain a kind of wisdom, a kind of intuition which means you know the best thing to do in each and every moment.

It’s really pretty cool once you start to experience it.

Here's a simple, and free way of getting all of this and more:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

Amazing - Give this, and you get so much more

I think I’m getting pretty good at this relationship thing. I said that to Sumati the other day and a funny thing happened. She squarked and coffee came out her nose. Weird huh? I used to be terrible, but I wanted to get better because I was SO terrible, or at least, distinctly average. I always thought it was their fault, but then I woke up and realised it was mine. That wasn’t really a nice realisation, but it was a good one.

You see - All my relationships were based on waiting for her to give to me, because basically, “I deserve it”. My whole approach was “what can I get from her?” Gimme gimme gimme - it could have been my name. And quite often I was left wondering why my relationships didn’t sparkle, why they weren’t really alive, why they just failed.

“It must be her fault” I mused … wrongly. Here’s the thing: if you want a super alive, connected, loving, exciting relationship where arguments and disagreements seem to rarely happen … ?

Give. Give. Give and give. You first - give and then, you will get. It’s easy to get complacent in a busy relationship. It’s easy to take the other for granted. However, you have the key:

Give. The greatest thing you can give? Like I said the other day - first your presence, your complete attention. And second - easy peasy - your active appreciation and gratitude.

Praise and appreciate til the cows come home and watch what happens. Not only will your relationships light up, but your whole attitude to your life will.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Your habits around giving are probably all twisted up. Like many people you can be more free around giving, and indeed, receiving. The great news is these programmes can be refined, retuned, replaced.

Here’s the secret, I reckon: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

There she was, just lying on the floor

Yesterday I came in from my pedicure to find Sumati lying on the floor. “What are you doing down there?” I enquired. “Just hanging out”, she groaned, as Bubba crawled all over her, like a huge fly - undeniable, trying to poke wooden blocks in Sumati’s ears, as young ones are fond of doing. Sumati looked lifeless, a fraction of her usual self, so I packed her off to bed and sent Bubba to the work house.

(Part of that last sentence was untrue, and simply for dramatic effect).

Sickness - when you just want to crawl into a little ball and hide from the world. Yup, this morning I was infected as well. Never been so ill as with this little germ carrier in the house.

Someone had to look after Bubs so I stepped up. Sat her down with some toys and then grabbed a cup of tea and the newspaper to curl up in.

This wasn’t enough - Bubba wanted attention. ALL of my attention, not just a cursory “whats up?” and a brick thrown at her. So I gave up my plan. Instead of getting irritated, I sat down with her and played. And she was delighted. And all was well.

A nice reminder - all any one wants is your attention, your presence. It’s the single greatest thing you can give to your loved ones. For you to BE with them.

Sure, you need your “me” time, but your life becomes instantly easier (and fun too) when you’re there for those who you said you want to be with.

Chances are you’re not.

You’re on your phone, texting your buddy or on facebook, flicking through … or, you’re in your head, thinking about today, thinking about tomorrow, thinking about where you’d like to be instead …

Get present - give fully of your attention and watch all your relationships transform. Notice when you get irritated, when you don’t want to give your attention. That’s an excellent invitation to look at your priorities.

Just do it - give it a whirl and see what happens. I think you’ll like it.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Every part of your life gets smoother, easier, and more fun when you show up for it - not just your relationships.

If you’re ready for the greatest method of becoming effortlessly present, here is a 7 day challenge to become awesome at beating irritation and stress and getting to the one place you can live a life, now: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

The secret (not that secret, a better one!)

OK - so a semi-serious question for you: How do you want your life to be like? Here’s the secret to having the foundation for an amazing life, free of limitation and doubt and worry and flying off the handle ... beyond coffee and pork pies and tasty, salty, crunchy snacks (of course, those are your foundation, your must haves to a glorious life) …

So:

To create a wonderful future, all you need to do is stop and create a wonderful present. To get to where you want to go, start walking in the right direction. And the right direction for a foundation of freedom from struggle and overwhelm lies in this moment, this one … right here ... is it. Choose to take the half step back and be present.

Makes sense, right?

The choice that means you master any limiting habit such as anger or anxiety can only happen now. Do it now ... and enjoy it - for the path to heaven does not go through hell.

The very best question to get yourself back on an even keel, with perspective, calm and a smile on your face?

How can I enjoy this more?? ^^^ What a great question.

But in order to enjoy this more, you will have to sacrifice a few things. Worry is one. Anger is another. Going off into outrageous futures or clinging to pasts is another. Getting so wound up you can't see straight. Wanting to be right more than wanting to be happy.

Multi-tasking is probably another.

Think you're willing to give up those things for a glorious future? Super ... get going on that right now. Simply do your best to prioritise your peace in this here moment.

As best you can ... if you forget? No deal. Just remember once again.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. When you’re ready, come and join my free 7 day mindfulness "challenge". Most amazing thing ever, I think you'll love it:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

Your enrolment has been accepted

The most amazing thing (I personally think) is that you are enrolled and being educated in a very prestigious school ... and perhaps you don’t even realise it. If you are pay attention, if you are willing, the university of life is trying to teach you in the exact ways where you can be more free, have more fun and be more effective with less struggle and overwhelm and negativity:

Where and how you can truly be alive.

It’s trying to show you everything. It’s constantly pointing the finger, inviting you (sometimes in what may seem the strangest of ways) to really look and see how you can respond to life better. It’s constantly asking “how do you REALLY want to live?”

It’s a great question is it not?

How DO you want to live? At the end of the day, what do YOU want it to mean to be you?

With struggle and stress and overwhelm and negativity? Or fluidity and humility, confident and calm, content and with a sense of humour?

The great thing about this school is there are no failures. You always get another shot. There is always another lesson. Not to punish you - but to HELP you. All of this, no matter how it may seem, is indeed to help you! If you have the right attitude you will see this.

Isn't that cool? You're being looked after - you just need to accept the invitation.

Go well!

Arjuna

PS.

Freely choosing your response IS a definite education. A skill that requires practice and persistence. It’s a kind of fitness, an ability that you CAN develop.

Here’s an excellent way to get really good, really quick: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

Can I sell you a book? (it’s not really about that)

Someone was teasing me about flogging my (soon to be finished) book in a recent blog. It was all good natured and tongue in cheek, but the reason I’ve been telling you and quite a few others ISN'T just to sell a few copies. The REAL reason for my blabbing away about it is that the more people know about it, the less I can procrastinate and mess around and delay and not finish the thing.

I’ve done that for far too long.

My reason for delaying is always perfectionism. I can work on it, and work on it, and work on it, but perfectionism says “It’s not yet done” … and so it never gets done. "It's not good enough yet" ... and so it never ever gets released out in the wild.

Do you have a project like that?

It could be something big, like a book or some studies. It could be something “small” like doing some daily exercise or closing your eyes to meditate.

Sometimes its just that you are "too tired, and you’ll start tomorrow", or "next weekend" ...

Often you don’t feel like it, so “what’s the point even starting?” … Or - it just isn’t going as well as you think it should, so you quit early and go home … Or like me - it just needs a little more work before anyone else can see it … Or - you need to learn a little bit more before you start actually even doing something … right?

There is such power in just doing it, no matter how confident or ready or educated or how you feel about something.

Its amazing to me how someone would rather clean their whole house than sit quietly for 10 or 15 minutes. The hardest thing about meditation is sitting down and staying down until your time is up. Actually, I only know how hard it is to start AND finish because I have that voice too.

The good thing is - honestly - that voice loses it’s juice, it’s power, the more you just ignore it.

Here’s what I have learnt - and there’s a fellow called Pat Flynn whose email the other morning said exactly what I was feeling about just doing it: _______

"It doesn't have to be perfect. It doesn't have to be good. But you do have to finish what you start." _______

If you have people who know what you’re embarking on, what your goal is, that helps you hugely. Because when that perfect voice and the quit voice comes in, you have that extra bit of outside accountability and help not to listen.

Because … it doesn’t have to be perfect, it doesn’t have to be good, you just have to start. And if you start, just finish.

Then you have the things you say you want in your life.

You can meet your goals, have amazing adventures, go new places, spend quality time with people - all with freedom from overwhelm and stress and struggle and negativity.

You get to decide how you live your life - and that is worth its weight in gold.

Alrighty?

So lose perfectionism, lose doing it tomorrow, lose waiting until the conditions are great, and just start - and then finish.

Go well, Arjuna

PS. You know what? I am really quite excited to finally be finishing this book. It’s been years in the writing. I feel like I have - almost - achieved something. And that is quite the motivation to get it done.

The interesting thing is I don’t really care how many people read it. Just having it out there is the main thing.

Perfectionism? Having people like it? Well - who cares when I can send my dad a book that I wrote? Ha!

PPS Oh - talking about accountability - I have a little 7 day challenge to become more mindful. We have a little facebook group so I can help you actually do the 7 days.

Here’s all the info - https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ Many many people have been saying they aim to do 7 days, and then keep going because the benefits are so good. Good reason to join in, no?

The one thing about worry that stops you dealing with it

I used to regularly wake in the early hours of the night, worrying and anxious … about something, anything. It was always something that my mind would present for me to solve. “Fix this, and then you can go back to sleep”, it would say. And that is the trouble about worry and anxiety, is that it often cannot be solved. Especially at 3am when you’re not thinking clearly, at all.

There is a problem that cannot be fixed right now, and worry means you attempt to fix it, over and over again simply because you believe that if you solve your problem in your head, then you can relax (and go back to sleep).

It doesn’t work like that, does it? You just stay worried.

To get peace and freedom from worry, you have to come to a point where you realise you can’t solve every problem, you can’t predict every outcome. You HAVE to let it float until it comes the time when you can.

To get peace and freedom from worry therefore you have to be prepared to be at peace, WITH a problem, WITH an unknown. Can you do this?

Yes you can, it gets easier with practice. However you have to be prepared to give up your worry. And that is the hard part. Learning to be ok with not knowing. Learning to be that little bit out of control. Learning to be present and not constantly trying to fix the future.

You can do this, if you WANT to, and you're prepared to practice until you nail it (it doesn't take long to get this, from personal experience, I promise.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Getting the clarity to know what you are in control of and what you are not is key too.

Being more mindful will show you this, and here’s my excellent programme for being more mindful: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ Jump in, it would be great to have you.

What you’re looking for is what you are

I used to have a sweet little fridge magnet, attached not as you’d expect to my fridge, but no - it was on my toaster, just because that’s the way I do things. How bohemian, you might say? Exactly. But it reminded me - when I took the trouble to pause and connect and put myself in the place to truly be reminded - to stop the struggle, stop the fight to become, to secure.

What did it say?

“You already are what you seek” If you’re like me there’s a bunch of things you would like to do. There’s also a particular way you want to live your life. Open, free, unchained, adventures, growth, discovery, kind, helpful, big smile on your face.

To be more focussed and effective and efficient and unswayed by the ups and downs of outrageous fortune? You already have it - you just need to stop and slow down and be that.

To be more free and fun, living a big fat happy bloated life? You already have the means right here, right now, right within you.

Stop looking and frantically searching to become that, and JUST BE IT. If you have an effective meditation tool like the Bright Path Ishayas Ascension it will simply remind you of that state of being so much so you’ll never forget.

Closing your eyes therefore isn’t about escaping the world but equipping you with the means to tackle all your challenges head on. Calm, clear, content. Alright?

Good work - go well, go to it, live well! Arjuna

PS. I am so excited about my new book - just putting finishing touches on it, finding a cover, working out how to make it into a real paper book, and so, if you desire, will have it very soon.

Until then there are a million ways of making sure you put yourself in the space of remembering. If you haven’t seen the Facebook group perhaps stop by and check it out:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/anhouradaymindful/ 

You always get to go again

The thing about a new year is making new commitments to do different stuff or indeed, do the same stuff differently. Right? Resolutions to get fit, learn that language, be a better mum or dad, wife or husband, try not to lose your temper or worry so much … The fact is you always are beginning again. No matter how great or how terrible you think you’re doing, you’re only as good as what you’re up to now.

Which is nice - you always get another chance. And this moment is the one place you can do anything about. You can have all the good intentions for the future, but this is it. This is where the rubber meets the road.

Forgiveness for past failings is a huge thing then. So many people cling to what they have done wrong, way past the event. The biggest thing you can do is learn and move on. So it went tits up? OK - so what next? Learn and move on.

The purpose of mindfulness and meditation then isn’t only to gain perfect peace and calm, one that is unruffled by challenge or stress.

It is to see where you can live bigger and be more free. It gives you the awareness to step into an even more expanded and chain free and content and effective life.

So you’re going to see places where you react or habits and negativity that you weren’t aware of before. You can be ashamed of these things, or you can use it as fuel to become bigger.

Thats a nice choice, isn’t it? Shame or a launch pad … what do you choose? Go again, always go again. Not only will you get there, you’ll keep going beyond what you thought life could be about. And that is very nice indeed.

I’m here to help too - let me know, I’d love to chat. Go well! Arjuna

PS. If you’re interested in getting really good at this stuff? Here's a free guide which will help you so much: https://arjunaishaya.leadpages.co/sane-fb

Goodbye!

There goes 2017. Where did it go huh? I’m starting to sound like my father, heh heh. You might be the sort of person to take this time to look at what you want to do differently. What you want to do more of, and less of, and even what you want to do the same of.

For me, I’d like to eat more apples. I’ve had some delicious ones lately and I think they’re probably a good thing. Much better than a pack of crisps - which I am a recovering addict of.

In your review of 2017, you might want to make sure you include more meditation or mindfulness in your day. Everyone, me included, is banging on about it - perhaps there is something in it? And how are you going to know unless you give it a try, regularly? Well that is right indeedy - you won’t know unless you do it.

If peace and calm is important to you - Why not practice it every day? Just a little bit, that’s a grand place to start.

Do it on your terms. If you like using an app, do that. If you like breathing, do that. If you like staring off into space, do that. If you like walking, do that. Just do something!

Do something! Life only gets better when you show up for it. And that is the problem with all lives - everyone thinks so much about living they rarely actually experience it.

So don’t be like that - learn to show up. If I can help with that? Let me know.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Here's the best place to start being more mindful, stress free and enjoying each and every moment of your life:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

And they’re all gone!

The guests have left, there’s nothing but silence in the house and crumbs in the fridge. Whew. What a great Christmas! And as nice as it was to have everyone here, it’s really nice when they go too. I sat down to do my Ascension meditation and ended up sleeping for 2 hours. Which goes to show - if you need to sleep, you will sleep; so don't resist the snooze. But the greatest thing was how good I felt afterwards. I wasn’t really aware that I was knackered, but seems like I was, huh?

It’s an intense season, even just having a couple of extra people around, so take time to rest up and see what happens from there. Everything is better after a rest - isn’t it?

Exhaustion is that kind of subtle yet unsubtle reminder to take some time to completely switch off and recharge. Take the time! No one else is going to do it for you.

Now I recommend closing your eyes and meditating, because that really is a turbo boost for your levels of rest and recuperation and perspective and mood. But even just taking regular mindfulness breaks in your day - where you give yourself permission to do as little as possible - can make a whole world of difference.

Instead of being busy ALL the time, you’re giving yourself the permission to do nothing - even while walking, or driving, or cooking, or sitting around with a cup of tea staring out the window.

Simple, but such an enjoyable little habit. Try this link which will give you all the how to info and other goodies. If I can do anything for you? Just ask - hit reply, I’d love to help!

Go well, Arjuna

PS. Want to be more calm? More present, mindful and aware? Perhaps just less frazzled, angry, anxious? Try my free mindfulness challenge, I think you'll like it:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

A very nice tale about fish

After Christmas - and its a lovely time to relax and perhaps take a little introspection. A little examination of how you doing at all of this. After all, New Years is coming and bringing with it all of the resoluteness of being inspired to do things different. So - Why do you do all the hard work you do?

There’s that classic story of the business guru chatting to the fisherman. You might have heard it?

The fisherman wakes early, catches a few fish for his family and friends and then heads back to eat and enjoy time with his family and friends and explore his world.

The business guru suggests that he can help the fisherman be more successful. If the fisherman works really hard for a period of time, expanding his operations and employing more people, he could be rich, really rich.

“What would be the point of being rich?” the fisherman asks of him.

“So you could retire, wake up early, catch a few fish, return home and enjoy your life at your leisure”, replies the business guru.

The fisherman is puzzled, “Isn’t that what I’m already doing?”

Sometimes we do stuff the long way around. I see it all the time, people struggle and push and try and strain … and all for what?

So in some future moment, you can relax and be happy? Why not relax and be happy NOW?

Have a little look at what it means to be successful - to you. Not to anyone else, but to you. What is success? What are real riches, in your eyes?

If it’s exactly what you’re doing right now, carry on. If not? Why not make some changes? Life is too short for anything else, right?

Let me know if I can help, with any of this.

Go well, Arjuna

PS. One thing I know for sure that will help you live the life you want to live, is this: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

Your Christmas blog

Hey! So I know, you’ve had enough company just for a moment, and you’re off in the loo catching up on facebook and your emails in the quiet. Whew! Christmas is a little hectic, is it not?

I’ll be doing that too.

The thing I love about Christmas - ironically - is the doing very little after the very busy build up.

Just eating and drinking and chatting and reading and hanging out. I think I am world class at hanging out, and Christmas is designed for me.

We all very much hang out in the kitchen. A glass of sherry, a spot of spud peeling, some stirring of this and that, some very bad jokes, but all in all just enjoying each other’s company.

I keep coming back to enjoying life - enjoying each and every moment to it’s fullest. That would seem to be my topic:

To enjoy life to the fullest.

And the way to get that is always, always, getting out of thinking and getting into experiencing this moment, exactly as it is. The mind filters and creates such a different moment with all it’s grumps and grizzles - when you step outside of the mind, the world is such a different place.

Hey! So here’s to you, and if there is ever anything I can help with, please just ask. I enjoy helping, so let me know.

Go well! Arjuna

The horror of first world problems

Imagine my horror this morning as I awoke and found the coffee machine not working! What is one to do? And what will Sumati say when she get no coffee handed to her in bed? Big trouble, I can tell you!

I know, I know, serious first world problem, so don't fly off the handle. And it’s ok, I managed to make the coffee and awake the Sumati the easy way. But it was a close call, I can tell you.

The trouble with life is the unexpected. When things don’t go according to your plan. Sheesh! And sometimes that is just no problem, right? “Oh shucks” you’ll say, quickly followed by “oh well” as you fully accept your plan will look a little different than you thought it would.

Other days? The smallest thing, the smallest first world problem can be just the latest in a long list of grievous attacks on your person. You don’t say “shucks” you say other, more “grown up" words. Maybe you kick and scream. Or at least you want to.

I think one the greatest things you can do to enjoy more calm and ease - even in the middle of hard work - is to monitor your internal state.

When things are winding you up, noticing this and realising it would be useful to back away, even for a minute or two, just to get stuff in perspective. It is just a coffee machine but it has potential - if you let it - to destroy everything you hold dear. I’m being dramatic - but perhaps it does have that potential. Anything does - to ruin your good mood and make you irritable and chuntering and full of anxiety about what your Sumati might say when there is no coffee.

And it all seems to work out, doesn’t it? But staying calm means you can at least chuckle about it all, rather than lose it completely.

So - monitor, stay calm, enjoy being awesome. Thats me!

Go well - Arjuna

PS.

Perspective, clarity, calm - all wonderful things. Here’s how to get more and make sure you look after your own mood

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

The Rock for President?

Long time readers will know with how much affection I hold the Rock. I know he’s going by his more grown up name, now he’s a proper actor and all - but he’ll always be the Rock to me. The thing I love is that he looks like he’s having the time of his life. A real rags to riches story, now it seems like he takes nothing seriously, obviously working hard but enjoying all of it. He knows he’s not doing any fine acting, he’s just an entertainer, wanting to make people happy, helping them forget their troubles for a time or two.

Now - imagine my pleasure when I see that he is considering running for President of the US of A? If Reagan and Trump can do it, why not the Rock? Now wouldn’t that be fun? Perhaps.

Anyhow, the only point in this email is to remind you to have fun. Regardless of your goals and ambitions, whether life makes sense to you or not, whether you are struggling with something right now or not, see if you can’t enjoy what you have a little more. And why not?

No one else is going to do it for you. But all the worry and the struggle and the pushing and the drama … none of it is useful to get what you want. Survive the tough times you may have to, but at least stay reminded about what is most important to you. To you.

Ultimately happiness is not about what happens to you, but how you decide to respond to it. That, I believe, is the secret to a good life. Go well! Arjuna

PS. The more present and aware you are of this moment in time, the more able you are to create your own responses. This is very different from blindly reacting to life.

To get more present and aware, here’s a excellent little “training programme” for you. Super simple, super supportive, just super: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

The 2 things that cause more trouble than anything else

Money and relationships are the two things that will cause most people the most grief. Worries and anxieties about money. Worries and anger and resentment at other people. Grrrr … And this time of year they collide in spectacular ways - what with Christmas and various celebrations going on, don’t they?

I kind of understand why some spiritual traditions totally give up money and relationships - perhaps because they’re seen as too hard work.

But they are so valuable, extremely valuable, and not to be avoided at all. They will show you so much about yourself and as such can be an excellent source of evolution …

If you are willing - and that is the key part - if you are willing they will show you …

Your fears, your prejudices, your past experiences, when you hold tightly to something or someone, your jealousies and comparisons …

Where you’re not being present to this moment, where you’re blaming someone else for your reactions … and so much. Where you fly off the handle in outrageous ways …

Where you can claim back more choice for you - freedom of personal choice - and not let your mood be dictated by anyone or anything.

So look carefully at these things. What can you learn from them? Perhaps it’s simply to be more present, worry less about the things you have no control over? Perhaps it’s to ask for what you want from someone else, and not hold back so you get angry and resentful? Perhaps its to make sure you look after yourself, take even a few moments just for you, to regroup, to get present, to get calm?

Welcome these things, don’t hide from them. This is the university of life - it will help you master your mind so you can end all stress and suffering, and have the most amazing of lives.

Isn’t that wonderful? I think so. Questions? Lemme have them!

Go well, Arjuna

PS. If you want to make your next 7 days spectacular, amid the chaos and busy-ness of the season? Try this little mindfulness challenge:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

Swimming in pies

I found out today that there is ONE factory in the UK that puts out 2.3 million Christmas mince pies A DAY! Good news indeed!

I don’t know where they all go, but I certainly do help find a home for a few of them. I’m not fussy with pies - my family insists on homemade, but I will take any pie, anywhere, anytime.

So - Christmas is coming, if you celebrate it. Perhaps you don’t. Perhaps you get out, take off to somewhere warm and beachy for a quiet time?

Not a bad idea at all.

But there is stuff you do. Traditions, rituals - every year the same. Why? Why do you hold this stuff personally sacred? I don’t know, I’m asking the questions here. But YOU need to know why.

Hold it sacred indeed, it’s important. Find out what sacred is for you, and celebrate those times. It’s worth it, it’s necessary.

What about those more regular traditions? Like weekly or daily? The things you do differently, the things you do to stop, rest and remember … ?

When you’re busy they’re the first to go, aren’t they? They are negotiable and expendable. Because they provide no obvious benefit.

And yet they are the most important things you do. Because they connect you with what makes sense in your life. And that is your foundation - that sense of space, of rightness, of “this is what it means to be me”.

That there is crucial.

You gotta celebrate those traditions, keep to those rituals - until at least you find better ones to replace them. So don’t give them up, don’t let them slip. Alright?

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Here’s a good ritual you might like to start including in every day - it’ll help you end that stress and enjoy each and every moment so much more

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

You don’t need to understand

Henry David Thoreau once wrote: “As if you could kill time without injuring eternity.” If you’re like me, you have no idea what he is talking about. I saw it quoted somewhere and I was scratching my head for some time … before I gave up.

It sounded like it could be profound, but really I have no idea in which way.

I could guess, but I really need to sit down and chat with the fella about what he really means. Which is tricky since he’s nothing but dust and ashes, being dead for some time now.

Yah know, sometimes “experts” say stuff. Us uneducated peasants sagely nod our heads, while internally we’re going “What the …? I have no idea what she is talking about”

And that is okay. You don’t need to understand or even like any expert. You are you, and what is important is what inspires you. That may be an author, someone of TED, some long dead philosopher, may be it’s your partner and daughter.

The best advice is the simplest. If it’s not simple, it’s not true. If it requires excessive brain power to get it, then it’s likely to be unnecessary. Or poorly explained. Or both.

Really, all the philosophy you need is the reminder to return to this moment. Make the most of now, be filled with presence. Enjoy this fully.

Your true nature is nothing but goodness. Sit there and you will live the best life possible. Without needing to be taught the hows.

Taught? In this game, you need nothing - you have everything, it’s just you forgot.

Remember, remember now. Here you are complete, all is well, all is taken care of.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Remembering - here’s a little programme to help you remember more: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/

Don’t do a single thing!

I assume you’re reading these little whitterings of mine because you want to live the fullest, richest life. You want to be a better person - to enjoy your life, to help your loved ones, to make your community and your world a better place too.

The fact is you are already this better person that you seek.

This whole path is knowing that better happens just through the means of being present - because there, when each of us stops trying to improve, defend and correct ourselves, there is a space of presence and goodness. It already exists within, by just resting you are it.

That is the whole purpose of meditation and mindfulness. It is to relax into what is already there. It is dropping the insistences and demands and prejudices of your mind and being what you have always been.

You can’t think about this - you have to be it. The thought about it is nothing, the experience of it is everything.

There you are, rest, let go, just be right now.

Job done!

Need help? Just ask, I'd be happy to.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. A great practice for remembering just to stop and be this true nature of yours?

Right here: https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/ 

Feel like you’re out of control? Join the club

So I’m writing a book. You may have heard me say that before, perhaps years ago - and yes, it’s the same book. However, it’s finally on the final leg to completion. The editors will have it before Christmas, which is exciting.

However - the curious thing about writing a book is finding that it’s all been said before, by other people, and better.

Really what I’m doing is collating the right stuff from the right people - really I’m not writing, but doing a compendium of genius that I approve of. Perhaps you might approve of it too, or a least cause you to think differently, and approve of different things. I’ll let you know when it’s ready.

But I came across a quote yesterday, and a beauty is is: ________

“Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control, and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can't control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible”. Epictetus ________

What ARE you in control of? Can you even control your own mind? The answer is (and here’s a big tip for you meditators) - no, no you can’t. You can learn to ignore it, be indifferent to it, but you cannot stop it.

You can shape your thoughts in many ways. You can strengthen certain brain pathways meaning you’re more likely to respond to life with appreciation, gratitude, love and compassion rather than judgement, anxiety, anger, negativity.

This is nice, indeed.

The real key to life begins in becoming aware of what is beyond your thoughts. Becoming aware of the ocean that your fishy thoughts swim in. And that the ocean and your awareness, your consciousness is the same thing.

You can focus on the fish, or you can focus on the ocean.

Now that really is a thing.

So I’m done - see what you can control, stop fighting what you can’t. Be at peace, be effective, be joyful.

Easy life.

Go well! Arjuna

PS. Interested in nicer thoughts and/or this ocean of presence?

Here’s a thing for you:

https://arjunaishaya.lpages.co/houradaymindful/